


(not) the one for me

by klaineanummel



Category: Glee
Genre: Age Difference, Bisexual Kurt, Emotional Infidelity, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-20
Updated: 2014-11-20
Packaged: 2018-02-26 09:58:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 42,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2647733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/klaineanummel/pseuds/klaineanummel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There were a few things Blaine Anderson was looking forward to about the college experience. Falling in love with his new best friend’s boyfriend was definitely not one of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story was written for the Blaine Anderson Big Bang. It's the first bang I've ever managed to finish and I'm super proud of myself for that.
> 
> I really want to thank my beta, Carly, who helped me out tons :) as well, thanks go to my awesome artist loveheartlover :) She drew one of my favourite scenes exactly the way I picture it and I sort of love her for it. 
> 
> Alrighty, so the warnings: bi!kurt, bottom!blaine, a scene with explicit blaine/elliott and a scene with minor explicit kurt/tina, emotional infidelity, dirty talk, and possessiveness. I think that's it??
> 
> Based on [this prompt](http://glee-kink-meme.livejournal.com/50716.html?thread=63711772) on the GKM
> 
> I hope you enjoy :)

There's already a small crowd assembled around a picnic table when Blaine arrives at the assigned meeting place for the Musical Theater frosh group. Most people are already interacting with each other, upperclassmen standing apart only thanks to the bright pink handkerchiefs on their heads, but Blaine notices a few stragglers standing around.

He feels beyond overdressed in his jean capri's and purple polo, everyone around him milling about in swim trunks and t-shirts or bikini tops and short shorts. Some girls wear tank tops over their tops, but many have opted out. He tugs at the plastic wrist band that's wrapped a smidge too tight around his left wrist. If they're going to the beach, he didn't get the memo.

“Hey!” A small asian girl approaches him, waving enthusiastically, pink handkerchief announcing her upperclassman status proudly, “You here for Musical Theater?”

Blaine nods, glancing around, “Yeah, I'm Blaine.”

“Wonderful to meet you Blaine. My name is Tina and I can't help but notice that you aren't wearing a swimsuit.”

Blaine glances down at his feet. So they _are_ going to the beach. “Um, I didn't realize we were supposed to wear one. Sorry.”

She rolls her eyes, “Don't apologize, oh my God, you're not the only one. We're waiting on like, seven different people who ran back to their dorms to get theirs.” She smiles, wide and friendly, “If you want to go back and change I'll make sure we don't leave without you.”

Blaine shakes his head, “I live off campus. It would take me about an hour to go back home, get changed, and come back. Not worth it.” Tina's shoulders slump, “But it's fine, really. I'll just, I don't know, sit on the sand and take in the view. Play some Fruit Ninja.”

Tina clucks her tongue, shaking her head, “No good. As a Musical Theater Frosh Leader it is my duty to ensure that every Frosh participant have as much fun as humanly possible, and I can't imagine you'd have much fun sitting on the sand while everyone else splashes around in the water.”

“It's fine, really,” he tries to assure, but she's already grabbing him by the hand and dragging him away from the group.

“Come on,” she insists, “My boyfriend lives like, five minutes away. You look like you guys would be about the same pant size.”

“Girl Chang!” a voice calls out, “Where the fuck do you think you're going?”

“No swimsuit,” she points to Blaine, “Going to Kurt's to get one.”

“We're not waiting for you.”

Tina shrugs, “Don't worry, I know my way there.”

The voice seems appeased after that since it doesn't say anything more. Tina grins at Blaine and says, “Come on, I swear it won't take long,” before starting to tug on his hand again. Blaine lets himself be led away, already having far more fun than he was expecting to.

**

Just like Tina promised, her boyfriend's apartment is only a five minute walk from where the frosh group had met up. Tina marches right up to the intercom and presses the button next to the number 206 four times in a row.

Crackles come to life over the speaker and voice that sounds thick with sleep says, “Shouldn't you be at your frosh thing?”

Tina winks at Blaine, “I am. Let me in.”

“No. I'm sleeping and Kurt isn't even here. I have no obligation to you.”

She rolls her eyes and crosses her arms over her chest, huffing, “Elliott, come on. I have a frosh with me who forgot his swimsuit and we're going to the beach. Let me the fuck in.”

For a moment it's nothing but crackles, then, “I'm leaving the door unlocked and going back to sleep. Don't wake me up again.”

The door buzzes to let them in and Tina pushes forward, holding it open for Blaine to follow. “He seems friendly,” Blaine can't help but say, feeling entirely out of place as he follows Tina in the direction of the elevators. He's never really known how to act in spaces he's not used to.

“Who, Elliott?” she scoffs, “Idiot's just hungover. Normally he's so friendly it's almost annoying.”

“Oh,” is all Blaine seems to be able to say. Tina nudges him with her elbow.

“Would you relax? Loosen up. It's frosh week, it's fun.”

Blaine lets out a deep exhale and the elevator doors ding open in front of him. “I know,” he says, allowing his lips to curve upwards, “I am having fun. You're... you're being really nice to me. I appreciate it.”

Tina grins at him, smile splitting her face in half, “Well, I would love to tell you that I'm just doing my job, but that would probably be a lie.” She bumps her shoulder against his, “Honestly, I saw the way you were looking at everyone like your dog had just been run over, and you've got those giant Bambi eyes going.” She sighs, pressing the button for floor two, “What can I say, I'm a sucker for those eyes.”

Blaine smiles to himself, “That's good to know.”

She laughs, loud and wonderful. It makes Blaine feel at home for the first time since he's arrived, “What a rookie mistake,” she groans, “Shouldn't have revealed my weaknesses so soon. Dammit.”

Blaine chuckles quietly, “Seriously though,” he whispers, “Thanks. I didn't really know what to expect and you've just been so nice. I really appreciate you doing this.”

“Hey, I was a frosh too once upon a time,” she shrugs, “I remember showing up for frosh week with no clue what to do, not knowing anyone, practically shitting myself. It sucks,” the elevator stops and the doors slide open, “Plus, the whole point of frosh week is to make friends, right?”

“Right,” Blaine manages a full grin. His first friend in Los Angeles.

“There you go. Now, come on, let's go make Elliott regret drinking that entire bottle of vodka last night.”

**

They're only in the apartment for about five minutes, as long as it takes for Tina to run into her boyfriends room and find a swimsuit she thinks will suit Blaine. He doesn't see the mysterious Elliott, but he does see a picture of two ridiculously gorgeous guys standing side by side, both in wet suits, both with wet hair, both with surfboards standing up right beside them.

He wonders whether Tina's boyfriend is the tan, tall one with highlights in his hair and a tattoo running up his neck or the shorter pale one with chestnut hair and eyes so blue Blaine feels like he's staring into the most beautiful ocean he's ever seen. Both are gorgeous, there's no doubt about it, but there's something about the shorter one, the way the skin around his eyes crinkles with his smile and his wet suit clings to him like a second skin. Blaine wants to know him.

Before he can talk himself into sneaking a peak into the tightly shut door across the hall, just to see, Tina is back with a pair of light maroon swim trunks clutched in one hand and a bright blue towel in the other.

“Alright, let's get out of here. We're leaving now Elliott,” she shouts as loud as she can.

“Go fuck yourself Tina,” is the response.

“That's Kurt's job,” Tina bites back, then links her arm with Blaine's and grins, “Come on. Let's go hit the beach.”

**

As expected, the group had left without them, but that just made Tina laugh, throw her arm around Blaine's shoulder and exclaim happily that it just gave them more time to talk.

So, as they walk towards the beach, Tina with her ponytail swinging back and forth behind her, Blaine with his borrowed swim trunks draped over his shoulder, they talk. Blaine learns that Tina is a junior musical theater major originally from Iowa who came to Los Angeles to be with her high school boyfriend. The way she rolls her eyes as she tells him this is enough for Blaine to know that Kurt is not her high school boyfriend.

She has so far been in two school productions, in freshman year as a member of the ensemble and her sophomore year as a minor character with two lines in a song and ten lines overall. She hasn't minded being in the background really, except for the fact that, “The lead last year was Kurt's ex, and she just wouldn't let me hear the end of it.”

“How did you meet Kurt?” he asks, even though what he really wants to know is if her boyfriend has a tattoo up the side of his neck or eyes that shine brighter than a thousand suns. She grins at the mention of him. Blaine remembers the last time he grinned at nothing more than a name. He hopes her grin doesn't fade the way his did.

“His work, actually,” she twirls the end of her ponytail around one finger, sighing, “I went in to apply and he was wiping tables. We got to talking,” she shrugs, “I know it's not super romantic or whatever.”

Blaine smiles down at his feet, “It sounds lovely.”

“And what about you? I feel like all I've done is talk about me, me, me. Where are you from? Why'd you come to LA? Do you have a girlfriend, or a boyfriend? Come on, tell me everything.”

He doesn't really like talking about himself, but Cooper said that college was about stretching yourself beyond your limits, so he tell her everything. He tells her about Ohio and Dalton, about the Warblers and how they won Nationals his senior year. He tells her about how his dad recently lost his job, which meant he couldn't afford to pay for housing, which brought him to LA to live with his brother instead of sending him to the other side of the country. He tells her about his boyfriend since he was sixteen, the one he thought was the love of his life, the one who'd been his first everything, the one who'd broken up with him on the day he left for Los Angeles and told him he'd wanted to break up at the end of the school year but, “I figured you wouldn't let me fuck you if we ended then, and I sort of wanted a sure thing over the summer.”

She doesn't say anything as he tells her, just listens which is more than any of his friends back home ever did. When he's done she slips an arm around his waist and pulls him close to say, “Well, fuck him. You're here now, and let me tell you, there are much hotter guys here than in bumblefuck Ohio.”

Blaine thinks of the picture of her boyfriend and his roommate and agrees.

**

The beach is booming with activity when they arrive, brightly colored handkerchiefs interspersed sporadically throughout the crowd. There doesn't look to be anyone other than students there. “People tend to avoid this beach today,” Tina explains at his bewildered look, “I don't think I need to explain why.”

They find their group fast enough. Many of them have already broken off to go swimming, but there are a couple of frosh as well as two leaders sitting on by a large pile of backpacks and towels.

“Fucking finally,” a tall girl stands up as soon as she sees them, “Kurt literally lives two minutes from campus what the hell took so long?”

Tina rolls her eyes, “It's called making conversation, Santana. Blaine and I were getting to know each other.”

“Yeah, I'm sure you were. Alright, well, time for you to take over. Rach's been bounding around in that pink bikini of hers for ten minutes now and I don't want any of those scrawny ass freshmen to get any ideas.”

Tina plops down on the sand, “Why not? She's not technically taken.”

“Don't be a bitch Girl Chang,” is all Santana says before walking away, shaking her head as she goes. Blaine watches her leave, then asks Tina what that was all about.

“Her roommate, Rachel. They have this weird friends with benefits thing going. Santana wants it to be more, but she's worried that Rachel doesn't because Rach has never really been with a girl before. I keep telling her that Rach is crazy about her, but does she listen? No, of course not.”

Everything here seems far more complicated than it did back in Ohio. Blaine wants nothing more than to immerse himself into this group of people, to dive in headfirst and become part of their complicated. He wonders if that's what Tina wants too.

“I'm going to go change,” Blaine tells her, receiving a smile in response. As he walks to the change rooms, he tells himself that he shouldn't get his hopes up. It's only his first day on campus, after all, and Tina is the only person who's spoken to him. He can't let himself get so deep so fast.

He probably will anyway, but at least he can tell himself that he shouldn't.

He changes fast, the bathroom smelling like stale piss (and, vaguely, like come). It doesn't take him long to find the bright pink among the sea of colors, though he notices that a young man with a neon green handkerchief wrapped around his neck has joined them and is sitting close to Tina.

He feels his heart plummet. That has to be Kurt, there's no way he's anyone else, and the closer Blaine gets the more clearly he can make out the chestnut brown coif, the soft pale skin, the long lean body.

So Elliott is the one with the tattoo up the side of his neck. That's good to know.

“Blaine,” Tina waves at him, as if he can't see her. The young man beside her turns and Blaine is almost blinded by his eyes. They put the ocean to shame, those eyes.

He doesn't speed up, even though all he wants is to get as close to that man, to Kurt, to Tina's _boyfriend,_ as soon as he possibly can. He feels as if all the air has been stolen from his lungs as he approaches, but it all returns in a rush as he steps onto the towel beside Tina.

So much for not getting in too deep too soon.

“See, I told you it would fit,” she beams.

Beside her, the guy narrows his eyes as he looks at Blaine's swimsuit, then confirms what Blaine already knows by asking, “Isn't that mine?”

Tina turns to stare at him, “Maybe Blaine just owns the same one.” Kurt says nothing, only raises an eyebrow at her. She stares back for a good twenty seconds before she breaks into giggles, “Yeah, it's yours. He forgot his swimsuit and you guys looked about the same size.”

Kurt scoffs, glancing back at Blaine, “I think I'm a bit... bigger, don't you.”

Blaine's cheeks burn as Tina smack's Kurt's shoulder, “Shut up, you're making a bad first impression. Blaine, this is my boyfriend, Kurt.”

“Hi,” Blaine breathes, eyes finally locking with Kurt's for the first time. He wonders if this is how it feels to breathe for the first time. “Thanks for unknowingly letting me borrow your swimsuit.”

Kurt stares, blinks, smiles, “Any time. It's nice to meet you Blaine.”

“So you're a frosh leader too?” he asks. Kurt's voice is just about as beautiful as the rest of him, and Blaine is quite sure at this point he would do anything to hear him keep saying things forever. “What major are you?”

Kurt sighs dramatically, “I'm a double major, so I'm in musical theater as well, but I'm also doing fashion. I decided to go for the fashion frosh week after I saw the pink atrocities they wanted the musical theater leaders to wear, but low and behold,” he points to the handkerchief wrapped neatly around his neck, “You'd think fashion students could come up with something a little more fashionable.”

Tina smacks his shoulder again, “Stop finding new people to complain about this to.”

He leans forward and presses a soft kiss to her cheek. Unthinking, Blaine raises a hand to his own cheek. He wonders if falling in love with your first college friends boyfriend warrants a one way ticket to hell. It probably does.

“Hey, you're the one who keeps bringing me new people to complain to. It's your own fault, really.”

Tina sticks her tongue out at him, then turns back to Blaine. “Swimming?”

Blaine nods, forcing himself not to look at Kurt, “Please.”

**

Kurt spends about half an hour swimming with them before he's called over by another girl with a green handkerchief wrapped around her neck. Blaine watches him go with so much longing he's surprised Kurt can't feel it enveloping him. The muscles in his back shift so perfectly as he moves. Blaine wonders how smooth the curve of his spine is.

“God,” Tina lowers herself into the water, “Sometimes I forget he's mine,” she lets out a love struck sigh that sounds about exactly the way Blaine feels, “Sometimes I just watch him and think, shit whoever is with that guy is the luckiest person in the world. And then I remember it's me,” she giggles.

“He's really gorgeous,” Blaine admits, though gorgeous doesn't seem to cover even a tenth of Kurt.

“I know, right?” Tina pokes him in the stomach, “But don't worry, we'll find you someone equally as gorgeous and then the four of us can go on double dates. Maybe triple dates, if Santana ever pulls her head out of her ass.”

Blaine doesn't think there's anybody in the world that holds a candle to Kurt, but he nods anyway. Tina's his first friend here, after all, and he barely knows Kurt. He's not going to risk a possibly wonderful friendship because he wants nothing more than to drop to one knee at that very moment and promise himself to Kurt forever.

“That sounds perfect,” he tells her, eyes still on Kurt's retreating back.

**

“I'm in trouble,” he tells Cooper that night over dinner.

“Why?”

Blaine sighs, “I think I'm in love.”

“After just one day? Damn, you move fast. Who's the lucky guy?”

“My friend Tina's boyfriend.”

Cooper stares at him from across the table, a bite of lasagna halfway to his mouth, “Oh. That's where the trouble part comes in, huh?”

“What do I do?”

Cooper shrugs. “I don't know. Don't fuck him?”

“He's straight.”

“Still.”

Blaine nods. He doesn't think there's anything else he can do.

**

“Hey, Blaine right?”

Blaine turns at the sound of the voice, heart flying into his throat when he sees Kurt approaching him. “Yeah. Hey, Kurt.”

“Oh, thank God, you remember me,” Kurt wipes his forehead, as if relieved, as if there was even one millionth of a possibility of Blaine forgetting him, “How was the rest of your beach day?”

“Good,” Blaine tightens his grip on his backpack straps. “Tina's really taken me under her wing. She's really great.”

Kurt laughs, loud and clear and wonderful, “You don't have to tell me twice. Actually, I'm on my way to meet her for lunch before our next frosh thing. Wanna tag along?”

As if Blaine could say anything but yes.

**

Tina, Santana, and Elliott are already sitting at a table when they get there, Tina and Elliott listening intently to something Santana's saying.

“Hey guys, look who I found,” Kurt announces. Blaine waves awkwardly when all three turn to look at him.

Elliott frowns, “Sorry, I don't think we've met.”

“He's swimsuit boy,” Santana drawls, “Also, you just interrupted my wonderful pussy story Hummel, so thanks a lot.”

Blaine drops into the chair next to Elliott, flushing when the man gives him an interested one over. “I'm Blaine,” he says, extending his hand. Elliott shakes it firmly, grinning and telling Blaine his name in return.

“Well, Santana,” Kurt replies, placing his backpack on the chair next to Tina, “As much as I would love to hear about all the wonderful sex you're currently having with my ex, I think I'm going to get some food. Blaine, join me?”

Blaine stands back up in an instant, following Kurt to the food court entrance. He briefly glances back at Elliott, who is watching him curiously. Blaine flushes and continues to move forward.

“So, you used to date the girl Santana's seeing?” Blaine asks, unable to think of anything else to say. Kurt shrugs.

“Briefly,” Kurt shrugs, “It wasn't really that big a deal, but it's still weird to hear about.”

“Yeah,” Blaine tries to think about how he'd feel if he had to listen in explicit detail to stories about Sebastian's sex life. He doesn't even want to think about it. “So, you and Tina, Rachel and Santana... is Elliott seeing anyone?”

Kurt's smile could light up a room. “I knew you were checking him out,” he smirks, moving into the line for a pizza store. “He isn't,” he winks and Blaine feels warmth spread all the way down to his toes.

“I don't- I wasn't-”

“Don't worry, I won't tell,” Kurt promises, “You're secret's safe with me.”

Blaine doesn't say anything else. It's probably better this way, he guesses. He'd rather be the dorky freshman crushing on Tina's single friend than the dorky freshman crushing on Tina's boyfriend.

Santana's just finishing up her story by the time they get back, scowl etched across her face, arms crossed over her chest, “Like what the fuck ever,” she spits out, “She knows I dated Britt, so it's not like I have anything against her liking guys too. She needs to get the fuck over herself.”

“So stop sleeping with her,” Tina says, tilting her cheek up to accept the kiss Kurt presses to it before sitting down beside her, slinging an arm over her shoulders. Blaine sits back down beside Elliott, giving him a small smile, if only to cement the idea in Kurt's mind that he's crushing hard. Elliott smiles back.

“It's not that simple,” Santana growls.

“No, it really is,” Elliott rolls his eyes, “Just tell her honestly that you want to date her, and if that's not what she wants, find someone else. It's not as big a drama as you're making it out to be.”

Santana grumbles under her breath but lets it go. Blaine wonders how often they've had this discussion.

“Oh, I almost forgot,” Tina perks up, “Sam's having a bonfire at the cove tonight. He says we're all invited,” she specifically looks at Blaine, smiling, letting Blaine know he's included. It makes him feel like the worst person in the world.

“Can't,” Santana sighs, “I told Gunther I'd pick up a couple extra shifts this week. Fucking figures he gives me no hours over the summer but as soon as school starts back up he wants me there twenty four hours a day.”

Tina pouts, “Elliott?”

“You know I'm always down for a good bonfire. Is it BYOB, or is Sam providing?”

Tina raises an eyebrow, “What do you think?”

Elliott shrugs, “I'll bring vodka.”

“What about you, babe,” Tina turns so she's facing Kurt. Kurt shrugs, taking a bite out of his pizza.

“You're going, right?” Tina nods, “Then I'll be there.”

“Gross,” Santana mumbles.

Tina sticks her tongue out at her before leaning up to kiss the corner of Kurt's lips. She then turns to Blaine who is trying incredibly hard not to blush. “You'll come, right?”

Blaine nods, “Yeah. I've never been to a bonfire before. Should be fun.”

“Awesome,” Tina claps her hands together, “I'll let Sam know.”

“This is exciting,” Kurt says, lips curling into a smirk as he stares at Blaine, “Blaine's first California bonfire.”

Blaine can feel the air leaving his lungs as he looks into Kurt's eyes. Tina pinches Kurt's arm, “Stop it, you're scaring him.”

“What? I'm just excited to be around to experience one of Blaine's firsts.”

The look he gives Blaine sends shivers down to his toes. “Christ,” Santana stands up, “I can't deal with your weirdness today Hummel. I'll see you guys later.”

Dealing with Kurt's weirdness sounds like something Blaine wants to do on a daily basis. He takes a bite of his pizza instead, ignoring the way Tina picks up Kurt's slice and holds it up to his mouth as if nothing happened. As if Kurt hadn't just eye fucked her newest friend right in front of her.

Blaine looks up to see Kurt licking at a glob of sauce stuck to the corner of his mouth, laughing as Tina tries to dab it away with a napkin instead. No, he's reading into things. Kurt hadn't just eye fucked him across the table. Of course not. Look at him, teasing Tina, pushing the pizza in her face, laughing like he couldn't be happier.

“I hope you guys realize that you're disgusting,” Elliott says, pushing his rice around on his plate.

“Please, you're just jealous,” Kurt shoots back, “But fear not. We'll find you someone soon, my woefully single friend.” He then very deliberately winks at Blaine, making the tips of Blaine's ear turn red.

Elliott doesn't reply beyond throwing a pea at Kurt before eating a forkful of rice. Blaine buries himself in his pizza. He needs to get over this thing with Kurt, and fast.

 


	2. Chapter 2

It's nine o'clock when the doorbell to Cooper and Blaine's house rings. He rushes to answer it, heart pounding in his chest in excitement. Cooper's been bugging him about his first bonfire all day while at the same time shooting him congratulatory glances at finding a group of friends so soon.

“ If you're back late just try and be quiet okay?” Is all his brother says as Blaine sprints past him. Blaine rolls his eyes and stops in front of the door, taking a moment to catch his breath before opening it as gracefully as he can.

Elliott is standing on the other side, sunglasses perched on top of his head, deep v-neck showing his tattoo disappearing down his chest. He smiles at Blaine, gives him a once over, and, “Hey Major Overdressed,” he fakes a salute. Blaine looks down at his khakis and polo, unsure of what's wrong. Elliott seems to notice his concern and quickly says, “Not that you don't look cute, because you do. Just, you know, bonfire. You don't want to get sand in all your nice clothes, do you?”

Blaine sucks on his bottom lip for a moment before admitting, “These are kind of the only kind of clothes I have.”

Elliott blinks, “Oh. Well, in that case, you look fantastic. Come on, your chariot awaits.”

Blaine calls back a goodbye to his brother and then follows Elliott to the a convertible sitting in front of his house. He hates the way his eyes are immediately drawn to where Kurt is sitting in the back listening to whatever the tiny brunette sitting in the passenger's seat is saying. Tina is in the back as well and she waves at Blaine enthusiastically.

“ Rach, back seat,” Elliott calls out. The brunette turns to look at them and scowls.

“ What the hell Elliott, I never get to sit in the front.”

“ Sorry, freshman privilege,” Elliott winks at Blaine over his shoulder, “Plus, he's ten times hotter than you, so. Scoot.”

The girl, Rachel Blaine assumes, scoffs at him and then crawls into the back of the car. “This happens every time,” she grumbles to Tina as Blaine and Elliott get in the car, “Whenever it's my turn to ride up front some new piece of man candy shows up and steals my spot.”

“ It's not your spot Rach,” Kurt chuckles, “It's the spot of whomever Elliott is trying to get into bed.”

Blaine looks over his shoulder, eyes wide and alarmed, heartbeat skyrocketing. “Wh-What?”

“ Ignore those assholes,” Elliott says, starting the car up, “They like to shoot their mouths.”

“ Keep telling yourself that Elliott,” Tina jeers, “But you know they're right. I don't think I can remember a single time when you've made one of us move to the back for a guy and then haven't fucked him.”

Blaine doesn't know what to say, so he just keeps his mouth shut and looks down at his lap. “Whatever,” comes Elliott's voice, “Let's get going, they're probably starting without us.”

Rachel starts talking as soon as the car takes off, and soon enough all four friends are engaged in a deep conversation about a movie that Blaine hasn't gone to see yet. He wishes he could join in, say something, anything, do something to make him feel less lame than he currently does. Instead, he keeps his mouth shut and his eyes on his lap, spending the entire ride wondering if Kurt has glanced his way.

**

They arrive at what looks like a dead end and everyone jumps out of the car, shouting at Elliott to pop the trunk. Elliott does so, and then puts his hand on Blaine's arm to stop him from getting out of the car, “Look,” he speaks quietly so the others don't hear, “I'm really sorry about what they said. You know, about you sitting in the front.”

“ It's okay,” Blaine tries, forcing a smile, “My ex, his friends used to say shit like that all the time. It's no big deal.”

Elliott shakes his head, “Yeah, it is. I don't want you thinking I'm just trying to get into your pants or something.”

“ Don't worry, I don't.”

“ No, it's-” Elliott runs a hand through his hair, “I like you. You're cute, and you seem nice from the twenty minutes I've spent with you,” Blaine smiles again, for real this time, “I don't want you thinking I'm some sleazeball that's just trying to get you into bed. Not that I would object, if you wanted to,” he adds, grinning to show Blaine he's teasing. Blaine laughs too.

“ I don't think you're a sleazeball,” he assures, “And I like you too. I'm just... My boyfriend – or, ex I guess – just broke up with me a week ago. I'm still getting over it.”

“ Oh, totally. I get that. Don't worry, I'm not trying to pressure you. Just wanted to make sure you didn't get the wrong impression.”

“ I didn't,” Blaine, feeling bold, reaches over to where Elliott's hand is still resting on his forearm and squeezes it, “Thanks.”

Elliott smiles at him for a second before sitting up straight, “Alright, enough serious talk. Come on, we've got a bonfire to attend!”

**

Soon enough Blaine finds himself sitting on the sand next to Elliott, a can of Coke in hand, watching everyone around him interact and wondering what exactly he's doing here. There's maybe one other freshman in attendance, an already drunk blonde who is clinging desperately to Asian man and giggling at everything he says. Blaine looks down at his Coke with a heavy sigh.

“ What's wrong, man?” Elliott asks, shuffling closer. Blaine glances at him and then back at the blonde.

“ I used to be like that,” he says, quiet enough for nobody else to hear but loud enough for Elliott to make out what he's saying, “Like that girl.”

“ An alcoholic in the making?”

Blaine chuckles, “No,” he's still smiling, even as his heart bangs almost painfully against his ribs, “I used to hang all over the guys I liked like that. You know, fluttering my eyelashes, laughing at all their stupid jokes, desperately hoping they'd like me enough to give me even a second of their time.”

Elliott hummed around the neck of his beer bottle, “Did they?”

“ Did they what?”

“ Did they give you a second of their time.”

Blaine snorts, “One did. He gave me two years of his time, actually.”

Elliott whistles quietly, “Damn. This the guy who just broke up with you?”

“ Yeah,” Blaine shrugs, “It's whatever. I knew it was coming but I sort of clung to it either way. Tried to make a bad thing work.”

“ We've all done it,” Elliott pats him on the shoulder, “Don't beat yourself up about it too much.”

Blaine looks down at his feet, “I'm not,” he tells the sand, “At least, it doesn't feel like I am. I mostly just feel super lame for holding on so tight for so long.”

“ Like I said, don't worry about it,” Elliott takes a swig of his beer, “You're in LA now. Do you have any idea how many hot, single gay guys live in this city?” His eyes widen, “Tons. So many.”

_ And yet the one who catches my eye is a taken straight guy. Just my luck _ . “Really? 'Cause so far I've only met one.”

Elliott laughs, “Smooth,” he shakes his head, “Come on, I'll get you a drink. It'll cheer you up a little.”

Blaine barely spares a glance to his lukewarm Coke, nodding and letting Elliott help him to his feet. They walk around the circle of people gathered around the fire, Elliott's hand hanging at his side. Blaine wonders if he expects Blaine to take it. What would happen if he did take it? He's not too sure if he wants to find out.

“ Alright, here we go,” Elliott holds up a bottle of rum, “Give me your Coke.”

Blaine does, glancing around as Elliott mixes his drink. There's not actually that many people sitting around the bonfire, somewhere between twenty or thirty tops. Blaine can see Rachel talking to Sam, whom he was introduced to briefly when they arrived, waving her hands around, drops of her drink spilling out every now and then. A guy he doesn't know is listening in on the conversation and looks like he's trying to find a way to integrate himself.

A little to their left he sees Kurt and Tina. Tina is sitting in Kurt's lap with Kurt's arms wrapped tightly around her, her head resting on Kurt's shoulder. His nice, perfect, oh so broad shoulder. Blaine can see himself in her place so easily. He'd fit so perfectly in Kurt's arms.

“ He's hot, right?” Elliott says, snapping him out of his reverie, holding a red solo cup out to him. Blaine takes it, glad for a distraction.

“ Who?” he asks as he sips the drink. It's not the strongest he's had and he's thankful. Sebastian used to make him incredibly strong drinks. He said it was because Blaine got horny when he was drunk.

“ Kurt,” Elliott rolls his eyes, as if it's obvious, “You know, tall-ish, brown hair, blue eyes, my roommate, Tina's boyfriend?”

Blaine blushes, “I know who Kurt is.”

“ Obviously,” Elliott teases, “You can't keep your eyes off him.”

Blaine blushes some more. “I'm just not used to people like him.”

Elliott laughs, “What, ridiculously good looking people?” He takes a swallow of his beer, “It's okay, you get used to being blinded by his looks after a while.”

“ I'm not-”

“ It's okay, I'm just teasing you. Trust me, I've been in your shoes. Just a heads up, there really is nobody else like him out there. Sorry.”

Blaine shrugs, “It's nothing.”  _ It's everything _ .

“ Alright,” Elliott drapes his arm over Blaine's shoulder, “I'm going to believe you, mostly because I want you to myself and if you don't have a crush on Kurt then there's a higher chance you'll go out with me,” Blaine opens his mouth to respond, but Elliott cuts him off, “When you're over your ex and shit. I'm a patient guy, you'll see.”

“ Elliott!” Tina calls out, and Blaine can see she's turned around so she's practically straddling Kurt, “Stop hogging my Blaine.”

“ _ Your  _ Blaine?” Kurt asks, pinching her side. She giggles and folds herself into him. Elliott fakes a gag.

“ Disgusting,” he says, leading Blaine their way, arm staying firmly around his shoulders. It feels nice, but not the way that it had felt when Sebastian had his arm around Blaine's shoulders. Not how he knows it would feel to have Kurt's arm around his shoulders.

“ Look who's talking,” Tina throws back, “You two haven't been apart all night.”

“ Yeah, it's called making friends,” Elliott says, though the way he squeezes Blaine's shoulder tells a different story. Blaine just knows he's going to be up incredibly late thinking about the gesture, as well as the way Kurt's eyes linger on Elliott's arm around Blaine and how he pulls Tina closer to him when he looks away.

“ Elliott's been letting me cry on his shoulder,” Blaine says, trying to distract himself, “I'm being kind of boring, to be honest. I haven't stopped talking about my ex.”

“ Hey, I don't mind,” Elliott squeezes him closer, “Like I said, making friends. You can talk to me about that stuff whenever.”

“ Or me,” Tina squeals, pushing herself a bit closer to Blaine and slightly out of Kurt's grasp, “I was his friend first Elliott, stop trying to steal him.”

“ I'm not trying to steal him. It's called sharing, Tina, ever heard of it?”

Tina sticks her tongue out, “It's called I introduced you so be more grateful, Elliott.”

“ I think it's called shut the fuck up before I take Blaine myself,” Kurt interrupts, pulling Tina up against his chest. Blaine's heart skips a beat. He wishes it wouldn't.

“ You wouldn't!” Tina says, “Kurt, tell me you wouldn't.”

Kurt shrugs coyly. Tina pouts, which makes Kurt laugh and pull her in for a kiss, “Don't be that way.”

“ You started it asshole.”

“ Technically Elliott did.”

“ Okay, now you two need to shut up,” Elliott grumbles. Kurt and Tina glance at him and then, much to Blaine's dismay, begin to eat each others face. Elliott's face scrunches up in disgust, “That is not what I meant and you know it.”

Tina shrugs her shoulders without separating her mouth from Kurt's. Blaine watches them, almost mesmerized by the ebb and flow of their lips, the way they move together almost seamlessly. They've clearly been doing this for a while. He can't help but wonder how long.

“ Get a room,” Rachel shouts from where she's sitting. Several people around the fire cackle, and Blaine forces himself to do so as well, even when his heart lurches painfully when Tina whispers, “Now there's a thought,” into Kurt's mouth. They separate after that and stare at each other for a couple of seconds before Tina is scrambling off of Kurt's lap and standing up, Kurt hurrying to follow her.

“ We're out of here,” Kurt announces, causing hoots and hollers to erupt amongst the group.

“ And how exactly do you intend to get back?” Elliott asks, smirking, “I drove, remember?”

Kurt and Tina exchange a glance. “And you're totally ready to go home now, right?”

Elliott shrugs, “I don't know. I'm kind of liking it here. It's peaceful.”

Tina kicks him gently in the side, “Elliott, come on.”

“ No,” Elliott crosses his arms over his chest, “What?” he asks when Tina kicks him again, “You think I'm leaving early just to drive you guys home only to be kicked out for at least an hour? No thanks.”

“ Elliott, come on,” Kurt hisses.

Blaine clears his throat, “You can crash at mine if you want, Elliott,” he blushes when just about everyone around turns to look at him, “I mean... I have a couch in my room. If you want.”

“ Get it!” someone shouts. Blaine looks down at his lap, feeling Elliott's eyes on him.

There's silence for a bit, then Elliott sighs, “Fine,” he finally says, “But you two better behave on the ride back or I swear to god-”

“ We'll be angels,” Tina squeals, “Thank you, thank you Elliott!”

Elliott grumbles under his breath and stands up. Blaine stands up as well. “Rachel, you'll find your own way back?”

“ Yeah, yeah, get out of here you horny bastards.”

Kurt and Tina rush ahead of them, hands clasped together. Elliott pulls Blaine aside as soon as their out of hearing distance from the rest of the group. “You don't have to do this you know. I'll just go to the diner Santana works at and hang out there for an hour. I'm sure it's dead by now anyway. She can keep me company.”

Blaine shakes his head, “It's fine. I'm sure my brother will be ecstatic that I'm bringing a guy home so soon.”

Elliott laughs, “Alright, well, if you say so,” he then stands up straighter and points at Blaine accusingly, “But don't think I'm some kind of floozy, Anderson. I won't put out until you buy me dinner.”

Blaine blushes. “I'll keep that in mind,” he says quietly. Elliott laughs again and then starts to pull Blaine towards the car.

**

That night Blaine tosses and turns, listening to Elliott's heavy breathing across the room. He thinks about what might have happened if he'd told Elliott that he could sleep in his bed, there was no need to make up the couch. Would Elliott have accepted? Would he have insisted on sleeping on the couch? If he'd accepted, what next? Lying next to each other awkwardly until one fell asleep? Would Elliott have made a move, leaned over and kissed Blaine to thank him for letting him crash there? Would Blaine have kissed back?

He wonders and wonders until he finally drifts off, having successfully convinced himself that he's wondering because he might like Elliott and not because it keeps his mind off of what Kurt is doing at this exact moment.

 


	3. Chapter 3

The next week passes in a blur of frosh activities and Tina begging for the details of what happened between Blaine and Elliott after the bonfire. Blaine demures every time, assuring her nothing happened, but no matter how many times he tells her she doesn't believe him.

“ Come on!” she bursts the Saturday before his first semester of college begins, “You've been killing me all week. I  _ have  _ to know. Please, you've tortured me long enough.”

“ Tina,” Blaine reaches forward and takes her hands between his, squeezing them over the table in the cafeteria, “Look me in the eye when I tell you this.” She does, “Absolutely nothing happened between Elliot and I.”

“ Bull!” she pulls her hands away, “He's been wearing his stupid 'I got laid' grin for the past week. Come on, you guys must have kissed at least, right?”

“ Scout's honor.” Blaine chuckles, “If anything ever happens between Elliott and I, I swear you'll be the first to know.”

Tina huffs and leans back in her chair, sticking her nose in the air and says, “Yeah, I better.”

**

Blaine's first day of university is long and tiring. He has three classes on Monday, each one right after the other, and even though he's explored campus and made sure he knows where all his classes are ahead of time he still finds himself sprinting in the wrong direction for five minutes before he realizes he has Introduction to Theater History next and not Dance 101. He arrives ten minutes late and is forced to sit right at the front of the class, sweat rolling down the side of his face, wincing every time the professor makes eye contact with him and raises his eyebrow ever so slightly.

By the time he's done at 2pm he's dead on his feet and wants nothing more than to catch the bus home and sleep until his next class on Tuesday. He drags himself to the bus stop, trying not to look as exhausted as he feels and making a mental note to bring a water bottle the next day. How could he have forgotten how hot Los Angeles is?

A loud honk draws his attention and he looks up to find the source of the noise. Nothing can stop the grin that splits his face when he realizes it's Kurt, sunglasses perched on the bridge of his nose, freckled forearm resting jauntily on top of the drivers door of Elliott's car, his other hand still poised over the horn.

“ Need a ride?” Blaine blushes and glances around, making sure that Kurt is referring to him. Kurt notices and rolls his eyes, “Yes you, who else would I be talking to. Get in.”

Blaine hurries over to the passenger side of the car, climbing in as quickly as he can so as to not obstruct traffic. Or, at least that's what he tells himself. “Thanks,” he breathes, legs like jelly the moment he sits down, “You know I'm way out of the way though, right?”

Kurt shrugs, “Yeah, I know. Stop shooting a gift horse in the mouth, weirdo.”

Blaine chuckles as Kurt speeds up, waving at a tall blonde girl on the sidewalk next to them. “Why do you have Elliott's car?”

“ Lucky bastard doesn't have class Mondays,” Kurt shakes his head, glancing around before turning right, officially exiting campus. “He's been rubbing it in my face all summer, so in order to get back at him I'm stealing his car every Monday even though it actually takes less time to walk,” Blaine can't be too sure with Kurt's sunglasses covering his eyes, but he thinks Kurt glances over at him, “It's good to know you're done now though. He'll hate knowing I'm using his car to drive you home every Monday.”

“ Because of gas?” Blaine asks, knowing how naïve that sounds. Kurt raises an eyebrow and chuckles.

“ Sure. Let's go with that.”

They're silent as Kurt navigates the busy area around campus, Blaine's heart pounding wildly in his chest. He didn't expect to see any of his friends (they are his friends, right?) today seeing as they're all juniors and probably have classes in totally different buildings than Blaine does, and he especially didn't expect to get a ride home from  _ Kurt. _

Not that he's complaining of course.

He chances a glance at his friend, trying not to be too obvious as he takes him in. He's wearing a blue and purple plaid button up t-shirt, unbuttoned over a white undershirt with a set of dog tags hanging from his neck. Blaine can't help but wonder what they say. He forces himself not to look at what sort of pants or shorts Kurt is wearing, worried he'll be caught looking at his business.

“ So,” Kurt breaks the silence, fingers tapping the steering wheel, “First day of college. Anything like you expected?”

Blaine laughs, “Not at all,” he shakes his head, sighing, “Don't get me wrong, my classes are great, but they're sort of all over the place,” he shrugs, looking out into the LA traffic, “I didn't expect to spend half the day running around in circles trying to remember where everything is.”

Kurt nods, “Yeah, been there. Don't worry, within a week you'll have your bearings straight and you'll be arriving at each class like, ten minutes early.”

“ I hope so,” Blaine sighs, “I'm pretty sure my Theater History professor hates me, and don't even get me started on the spiel I got from Cassie July for coming in two minutes late.”

Kurt winces, “Bummer on the Cassie July front. Pray she finds some other hopeless soul to torture, there's one every year.”

“ Don't tell me it was you your freshman year,” Blaine can't help but tease, unable to imagine Kurt at the end of the horrific verbal assault he was forced to endure.

Kurt barks out a laugh, “No way,” he glances over at Blaine, lips curling up into a smile, “I'm way too good for her to hate,” Blaine isn't quite sure, but he thinks Kurt winks at him from behind his sunglasses, “No, it was Rach. She almost dropped out and everything.”

“ Wow,” Blaine whistles, then fidgets in his seat before taking the plunge, “So you and Rachel.”

“ What about us?” Kurt asks eyes now entirely focused on the road ahead.

Blaine shrugs, “You guys just... don't seem like exes, that's all.”

“ What do you mean?”

“ I- I mean that I don't know what I would do if Sebastian started hooking up with one of my female best friends is all. I'm not sure I'd be able to stick around, even if I had a new boyfriend myself.”

Kurt purses his lips, taking a right to finally get them out of the downtown traffic, “Sebastian is your ex? The one who broke up with you a couple weeks ago?”

Blaine nods. “Tina told you?”

“ She's really enamored with you. You're not bi, are you?” Kurt teases, poking him in the side without looking away from the road. Blaine squirms, heat rising to his cheeks.

“ One hundred percent gay over here,” he states, wiggling away from Kurt's finger. “Only ever liked guys, only ever been with guys. Well, you know. A guy.”

Kurt chuckles, “Good to clear that one up. Can't have you stealing my girl.” Blaine forces a smile and thinks  _ trust me, she's not the one I want to steal _ , “Right or left?”

Blaine glances at the intersection they're at, “Right.” Kurt turns his blinker on and turns, “You didn't answer my question about Rachel.”

“ I don't know,” Kurt sighs, bringing a hand up to push his sunglasses up his nose, even though they haven't moved throughout the entire drive, “I already told you we didn't date long. We hooked up drunk and then we basically slut shamed each other into dating for like, three months before we realized that we really were better off as friends.”

“ That's... good, I guess?”

Kurt shrugs, “It's pretty whatever. Don't get me wrong, I still find it weird that she and Santana are hooking up, but yeah. Overall it was really amicable.”

Blaine purses his lips, a question mulling over in his mind. He thinks, and thinks, then blurts, “Do you think you and Tina could break up amicably?”

Kurt slams on the breaks, causing Blaine's seat belt to dig deep into his chest. “What?” Kurt asks, turning to stare at Blaine with wide eyes. Blaine turns around, making sure there's nobody behind them. There isn't.

“ I just mean – I'm not saying you guys should break up. You're clearly really happy together,”  _ which really, really sucks for me _ , “I was just wondering if, you know, a potential break up were to occur, do you think it would be as amicable as yours and Rachel's? Like would you two still hang out with everyone?”

Kurt stares at him for a few seconds, then a smile begins to lick at the corner of his lips. “You're so weird, Anderson,” he shakes his head and starts the car back up, still smiling. “I've never thought about it honestly,” he continues, turning the blinker on and turning left. Blaine is surprised he remembers how to get to his place so well after only being there once. “I think it would depend on how it went down. Like, if she cheated on me and then expected me to hang out with her and the other guy I don't think I could do that,” he shrugs, “But if we just drift apart or something, who knows. Can't really see that happening but hey, like I said, who knows.”

Blaine nods. If he wasn't sure before, now he definitely is. He really, really needs to get over this creepy crush on Kurt. “You really love her, don't you?”

Kurt grins, and it makes Blaine's heart melt. “Yeah, yeah I do. She's amazing.”

Blaine nods again. “Um, that's me, right up there.”

Within seconds Kurt's pulled up in front of the house, idling the car and turning on the spot so he's facing Blaine, “Well Anderson, it's been a wild ride. I'll see you soon?”

“ Yeah, definitely. I'll be on campus every day, so. Yeah.”

“ Awesome. Oh,” he snaps his fingers, “Just remembered. Pizza party and mine and Elliott's, Friday. All the cool kids will be there.”

“ So, you, Tina, Elliott, Rachel, and Santana?” Blaine teases. Kurt smacks his shoulder.

“ Plus Sam and whoever his flavor of the week is.”

Blaine ducks his head and smiles, “I'd love to come. Thanks for inviting me.”

“ No problem, weirdo. Now come on, get out of the car, I need to get back before Elliott has a conniption. My phone's been buzzing non-stop for the past ten minutes.”

Blaine jumps out of the car, waving goodbye as Kurt begins to drive away. He can't help the sigh that emerges from deep in his lungs as he watches him leave.

**

“ Hey Squirt,” Cooper greets him, still in his pajamas, the bastard, “How'd you get back so early? I thought you had class till two.”

Blaine doesn't answer, instead says, “I thought once I got a boyfriend I was supposed to be done crushing on straight guys.”

Cooper claps him on the back, “Want me to make you some 'Happy First Day of School Sorry The First Guy You Like After Your Douche Ex is Straight' pancakes?”

Blaine groans, “Yes please.”

Cooper salutes him, “Coming right up.”

**

Just as Kurt promised, it does get easier. On Tuesday he arrives on campus half an hour early and calmly makes his way to his first class, sipping at his coffee as he goes. On Wednesday he has an hour gap between his only two classes of the day and he uses that time to begin studying the first play they've been assigned in his Intro to Acting course. Thursday he sees Tina as he's rushing to class and finds her waiting for him after the class is done and walks him to the bus stop, talking his ear off the entire way about how glad she is that she no longer has to suffer under Cassie July and how excited for the next day she is.

Blaine is excited too, in a way. He's excited to spend more time with his new friends, but he's not so excited at the prospect of being in the same room as Kurt and Kurt's girlfriend for more than half an hour. He promises Tina he'll be there as he gets on the bus, sighing as he slumps into an empty seat.

He has to get over Kurt sometime. Might as well start now.

**

“ You came!” Tina squeals in excitement when she answers the door. Blaine extends his arms in a gesture of 'here I am', and Tina rushes into him for a hug.

“ I said I would,” Blaine says, not entirely sure what to do with the armful of girl he has. He glances around the room to see everyone already present and hiding their laughter behind their hands, “Okay,” he whispers, gently pushing Tina away when she stays a tad too long.

“ Tell us all about your first week,” she takes his hand and drags him over to the couch, dropping him in the seat next to Kurt, much to Blaine's chagrin. It's only worse when Tina sits on Kurt's lap, smiling at him encouragingly. Kurt's arms wrap around her waist. They look so strong.

Blaine looks away and turns his eyes to Elliott, sitting across from him, sipping a can of beer, smirk firmly in place. Blaine shyly waves in his direction, to which Elliott replies with a wink.

He tells them about his first week, about how worried he'd been that he'd be Cassie July's pick of the semester and how thankful he was when she shifted her focus to a slightly smaller, thinner guy. Rachel latches on to that, beginning to wax poetic about how being Cassie July's most hated student only made her stronger, talking a mile a minute until Santana literally shoves a slice of cheese free pizza in her mouth. Rachel pouts but eats the slice anyway, glaring at Santana as she takes the floor.

Blaine snags a slice of pepperoni as Santana starts talking about her required statistics class and how she just knows it's going to be hell. He nibbles on it silently, forcing his eyes to travel to Elliott every time he feels the urge to glance at Kurt.

He needs a mantra. A chant. Something to remind him at all times. Kurt. Straight. Taken. Elliott. Gay. Available.

He sighs. Thank god he's not majoring in chanting.

**

“ No, you can't leave,” Tina begs, holding on to Blaine's arm as he tries to exit the building, “We're having so much fun, don't go.”

Blaine gives her his most apologetic look, “I'm sorry, the last bus to my place leaves in twenty minutes and I don't want to miss it.”

“ Elliott can drive you home,” Tina says, spinning on her heel and glaring at Elliott, “Can't you?”

Elliott shrugs, taking a lazy gulp of his third beer of the night, “If you don't mind someone who's drunk three beers over the course of four hours driving you.”

“ Thanks, but it's fine guys. You've wasted enough gas on me as it is.”

“ Then  _ stay _ ,” Tina tries again, “Please? The couch is super comfy, I swear.”

“ And so is Elliott's bed,” Kurt teases, waggling his eyebrows from where he's splayed out on the couch. Blaine masks the air getting stuck in his throat with a cough.

“ I want to, but. My brother. I don't know.”

“ Come on, stay,” Elliott says, casual as ever, “It'll be fun. Like a sleepover.”

Blaine glances between them. Santana and Rachel have already left, and Sam is passed out on the recliner closest to the TV. It  _ is _ getting pretty late; plus the bus ride is quite long.

“ Fine,” he relents, raising his hands in defeat, “But I'm sleeping on the couch.”

“ Nonsense,” Kurt speaks up, “Tina lied, the couch is shit. You can sleep with Elliott.”

Blaine stares at him, right into those eyes that contain the ocean, and begs to see something, anything. There's nothing but earnestness and teasing. He turns to look at Elliott who looks nonplussed by the development.

“ Whatever,” he says, setting his beer on the table, “I usually sleep on the right.”

Blaine nods, heart skipping a beat. He tells himself it's because of sleeping in the same bed as Elliott, and not from the way that Kurt is casually draped over the couch, smirk on his lips, teasing eyes still stuck on Blaine.

**

The few times that Sebastian slept over, Blaine spent the entire night tossing and turning, attempting to fall asleep but only managing it for half an hour intervals. He told himself back then that it had nothing to do with sharing a bed with who he then thought was the love of his life and everything to do with the possibility of Sebastian sneaking out in the middle of the night.

This time though, he has no excuse. He simply can't seem to fall asleep, and he's trying his damnedest not to move too much lest he wake Elliott, who'd flopped onto the bed minutes after Blaine cautiously crawled in and fallen asleep within seconds.

_ It's just because you're not used to the bed _ he tells himself, wriggling a little in place, trying to find a comfortable position.  _ Though you might be soon _ .

He glances over at Elliott. His back is turned to Blaine, and Blaine can see the beginning of his neck tattoo – a star, right behind his right ear. He's... he's a good looking guy. Objectively speaking. A bit tall for Blaine's taste, but Sebastian had been tall too. Granted, the height difference had always done it far more for Sebastian than it had for Blaine.

He doesn't mind the tattoos, not really. They're... interesting. Fun. He's never liked a guy with tattoos before. Always a first for everything he supposes.

He wonders what Sebastian would think if he knew that Blaine was already sharing a bed with a new guy. Purely platonically, of course, but still. Would he fly off in a rage of jealousy and realize what a grave mistake it was to let him go? Beg for him to return to him, to go back to the way things were?

Blaine doubts it. Even if he did, he knows he'd never take him back. Not after how they ended things.

He sighs. Carefully he pulls himself out from under the covers and begins to tip-toe his way into the kitchen. Maybe a glass of water will help him settle down.

“ Can't sleep?”

He jumps about five feet in the air at the sound of Kurt's voice coming from behind him. He turns around, face instantly burning red at the sight of Kurt in nothing but a pair of loose boxer briefs. He's holding a cup of milk and his lips are curved in that teasing smile that Blaine is growing so frustratingly fond of.

“ Sorry,” he whispers, “I didn't think anyone else was awake.”

Kurt chuckles, “I have a bad tendency of waking up in the middle of the night and not being able to fall back asleep for about half an hour. Milk tends to speed the process up a bit. Want some?”

Blaine nods, “I was just getting some water.”

“ Well, milk is better.”

Blaine doesn't think he's coherent enough to argue.

“ It's always weird, isn't it,” Kurt says, voice quiet, “Sleeping in a new place for the first time.”

“ Yeah,” Blaine agrees, watching the naked expanse of Kurt's back as he shuffles around in the fridge. It's so smooth and pink and looks so warm. Blaine wants to rub his hands all over it.

“ Hopefully not a new place for long though, right?” Kurt asks, glancing over his shoulder. Blaine makes himself look up, look him in the eye. He forces a smile, which Kurt notices, “Don't worry, I'm not trying to pressure you guys or anything,” he stands up, carton of milk in hand, “I know you just broke up with that gross ex of yours. I'm just saying, I see the way you look at each other.”

Blaine thinks of the slight twinge of attraction he feels towards Elliott and tries to compare it to the feeling of seeing the sun rise for the first time every time he looks at Kurt. He can't.

“ He's a good guy,” Blaine admits quietly, “Funny, nice, handsome. I'm just... not ready.”

He's not. Or, at least he thinks he's not. He can't be. This latching on to the first hot straight guy he meets – yes, that's it. It's his way of stopping himself from being hurt again. Kurt will never love him, so Kurt will never hurt hum. It makes perfect sense.

When he gets over Kurt, then he'll be ready. Then the tingles will start, the butterflies will return to their rightful place in his stomach, and he'll start to see Elliott as the cute, nice, amazing,  _ single _ , guy that Blaine already knows he is. He just knows it.

“ I get that,” Kurt nods, handing Blaine his glass, “Come on, drink your milk and go back to bed. Can't leave our bed partners alone for too long. They might get cold.” Kurt winks at him, finishing up the last of his milk and lapping at his top lip to catch any remnants. Blaine watches the action avidly, hands tightening around his own cup.

Even if it is just a rebound crush, it still hurts like hell to watch Kurt's almost naked, amazingly stunning, totally perfect form disappear into his room where Blaine knows Kurt's almost naked, amazingly stunning, totally perfect girlfriend is waiting for him.

**

“ That's stupid,” Cooper tells him the next day as they snack on a bowl of Cheetos, “If you were really on the rebound you'd have jumped this Elliott guy's bones the second you were alone together.”

“ It's not about sex,” Blaine tries. He doesn't know why he tells his brother anything.

“ Squirt, when you're on the rebound, everything is about sex.”

Blaine huffs and shoves a handful of Cheetos in his mouth. Last time he shares one of his theories with Cooper, that's for sure.

 


	4. Chapter 4

It isn't until three weeks into the semester that Blaine realizes he has perhaps been spending too much time with his new friends and not enough time with his studies. He starts getting behind on readings, and there's not a single class where Miss July doesn't call him out for not having prepared the dance in advance.

The problem is that even though it's becoming a problem he still doesn't want to stop hanging out with them. They're the only friends he's made thus far, and if he stops spending time with them on a regular basis he's worried they'll write him off, forget about him, and he couldn't stand that. Seeing them walking around campus and knowing he could have been their friend but he let his studies get in the way? Forget about it.

Still, he really is starting to get behind, so as a compromise he starts bringing school work with him whenever he is asked to hang out.

“ What are those?” Kurt asks, sitting down next to Blaine and handing him a Coke. Blaine flushes, the heat of Kurt's body warming him to his core. Before he can get too comfortable with their closeness he shifts a couple of inches over on the couch and hopes Kurt doesn't notice.

“ We're doing Faustus,” he explains, holding the book up so Kurt can see, “Not sure what it has to do with musical theater, but you know. Maybe my final will be turn it into a musical.”

Kurt laughs, bumping their shoulders together, “You're such a nerd Anderson. Put that away for now, we're hanging out.”

Blaine chews on his bottom lip, “I want to, but I'm already pretty far behind on this stuff.”

“ Come on,” Kurt wheedles, poking him in the side, “Santana and Rachel look like their five seconds away from either tearing each others throats out or tearing each others clothes off, both of which will be equally amusing. You really don't want to miss out.”

Blaine sighs, then closes his book, “I will never understand the obsession straight people have with watching gays and lesbians make out.”

Kurt laughs out loud at that one. “Who knows,” is all he replies, slinging an arm over Blaine's shoulder as they stand up, “Ladies, hold your fire! Nerd Anderson has decided to grace us with his presence.”

“ Finally,” comes Tina's reply from where everyone is huddled in Kurt and Elliott's kitchen. Santana rolls her eyes as soon as they enter the room.

“ Well, now all my desire to fight and to make out is gone. Look at those puppy dog eyes,” she points at Blaine with her entire hand, “I can't deal with those. Hummel, get him out of here.”

Blaine pouts, “I wasn't even doing the puppy dog eyes. I'm just really behind on my school work, so I-”

“ Would you put those things away,” Santana waves her arm in his direction, “I can't focus, you're adorable is distracting. Whose idea was it to befriend a freshman?”

“ Technically Tina's, but I'm totally willing to take the fall for it,” Elliott says, winking at Blaine. Blaine feels himself flush. It's been weeks and he still doesn't know how to handle Elliott's obvious attraction to him, especially since his rebound feelings for Kurt don't seem to be going anywhere any time soon.

“ Nope, this one was all me,” Tina claims proudly, walking over and draping herself over Blaine, “Give credit where credit is due, jackass.”

“ You wound me, Tina,” Elliott simpers, holding a hand to his chest.

“ Whatever,” Santana sighs, “Either way I don't feel like arguing any more. Come on Berry, shows over, time to get our lady kisses on.”

“ _ Santana _ ,” Rachel screeches as Santana pushes her way past Blaine and Tina, “What she means is we really do need to get going, lot's of homework, lot's of reading, you know how it is.”

She scurries out of the room after her, whispering furiously as they exit together. Kurt sighs.

“ I get that she's trying to be sensitive because of me, but seriously, who does she think she's kidding?”

Tina chuckles, “I think she's embarrassed by the casual aspect of it more than anything,” she shakes her head, “She told me back in freshman year that she could never see herself in a casual relationship.”

“ Not that it would be casual if either of them pulled their heads out of their asses,” Elliott clucks his tongue, “Whatever, I'm bored with this. Blaine, you said you were behind on school work. Need a hand?”

Blaine nods and lets Elliott lead him out of the kitchen, where Tina, Sam, and Kurt remain to discuss their friends antics. “Thanks,” Blaine says, quietly. Elliott smiles at him and shrugs, as if to say 'don't mention it'.

The thing is, Blaine wants more than anything to like Elliott. He wants to feel a flutter at the base of his stomach whenever he sees him, wants shivers to run up his spine every time they accidentally touch, wants to feel a pleased embarrassment whenever he catches Elliott watching him. It would certainly beat feeling all those things for a straight guy with a girlfriend.

One day, he tells himself as he and Elliott sit on the couch and pick up Dr. Faustus. One day he will

feel all those things for Elliott; and when that day comes he and Elliott and Kurt and Tina will double date and Blaine won't feel a thing when Kurt and Tina kiss or cuddle in front of him. He's sure of it.

**

“ Have you ever been surfing?” Elliott asks him one day, breaking the silence that has been surrounding their study session.

“ No,” he admits, “Why?”

Elliott shrugs, “Kurt and I are going on Saturday, maybe Rachel too. Would you want to come?”

Blaine chuckles, “You just want to get me in one of those wet suits.”

“ Guilty,” Elliott raises his hands above his head, “But no, really, you wouldn't even have to come in the water. Tina normally comes just to watch, so you two could hang out. What do you say?”

Blaine sighs, “I  _ have  _ always wanted to go to the beach in the autumn...”

“ Nice,” Elliott pulls out his phone, “I'll just make sure Tina is going. Can't have you ogling me too much; I might get distracted.”

Blaine sputters when Elliott winks and lowers his eyes down to his readings, cheeks dark pink. He doesn't have the heart to tell Elliott that it probably won't be him he'll be ogling.

**

Saturday is cool, a strong breeze chilling Blaine the moment he steps foot outside and causing him to run back in and grab a cardigan. Elliott has the top up on his car and it looks totally different from every other time Blaine's ever seen it. Tina, Kurt, and Rachel are already in the back seat.

“ You need to stop letting him sit in the front,” Kurt teases when Blaine gets in, a towel under one arm, “He'll get spoiled.”

“ That's the point,” Elliott shoots back, giving Blaine a warm smile and then heading off.

Most of the car ride is spent listening to Rachel talk about the upcoming auditions for the school musical and how she's absolutely perfect for whoever the lead role is. Blaine isn't entirely sure that Rachel knows who the lead is, but she still seems to be under the impression that she's perfect for it. About halfway through the ride, Blaine becomes seriously concerned about the amount of times that Tina rolls her eyes.

When they arrive at the beach it takes all of two seconds for Elliott, Kurt, and Rachel to rush out of the car and towards the back, grabbing their things as fast as possible. Blaine isn't entirely sure how they managed to fit three full size surfboards in the trunk, but he decides not to ask.

“ I guess it's just you and me, huh?” Tina teases, climbing out of the backseat with far more finesse than her friends. Blaine chuckles and gets out of the car himself, taking his towel with him and heading down to the beach with Tina.

**

Kurt, Elliott, and Rachel have been surfing for about half an hour when Tina gets a mischievous look in her eye that Blaine doesn't like one bit, “Okay, so,” she begins, “I know you keep telling me that nothing's going on between you and Elliott-”

“ Because there isn't.”

“ But let's be real for a minute, okay? Elliott's like, big. Right?”

Blaine glances over at her, raising an eyebrow in question, “Excuse me?”

“ You know.  _ Big _ .”

Blaine looks out into the water. Yes, Elliott is clearly the biggest of the three. He's pretty sure that if he wanted to he could swallow Rachel whole without it having any effect on his physique. “Why are you asking me that? Yeah, obviously he's big. He's like super tall and muscular.”

Tina's eyes gleam, “No, I mean, like, is he  _ big _ .”

“ I'm not quite sure I follow.”

She rolls her eyes and smacks his shoulder, “His cock, dumbass. Is he big?”

“ _ What _ ?” Blaine shrieks, “Wh- How the hell would I know that?”

“ Look, your whole 'nothing happened' thing is super cute and all, but come on Blaine, we all know you and Elliott hooked up. Nothing to be embarrassed about, Lord knows I hooked up with some pretty embarrassing people when I was on the rebound. It's no big deal.”

“ Tina, nothing happened. Nothing is happening. If something does happen it won't be for a long time.”

“ Blaine, come on, you really expect me to believe-”

“ _ Yes _ ,” he exclaims. “Yes, I do, because it's the truth. I would have told you if I had hooked up with him.”

Tina eyes him, “Really?”

“ Of course,” he smiles shyly, “We're friends, right?”

Tina smiles as well, “Of course,” she scoots closer to him on the towel, “Fine. So you guys didn't hook up. But when you do, because we all know it's going to happen sooner or later, you'll tell me if he's big, right?”

Blaine flushes to the roots of his hair, “Why are you so interested in his dick?”

She shrugs, “I'm interested in all dick,” she teases, “But really, it's mostly curiosity. He's so big everywhere else, I just want to know if he measures up where it counts.”

“ Oh.”

“ Because you never know,” Tina continues, eyes going to the water where their friends are paddling out once again, “Like, my high school boyfriend, Mike? He was really tall and buff, but dick-wise he was sort of meh,” she waves her hand back and forth. “But Kurt, he's got basically the same build as Mike, except he's shorter, but hot damn son.”

Blaine feels his heart jump right out of his chest, “ _ Tina.” _

“ What?” she smiles, clearly enjoying his discomfort, “I'm just saying. I never really believed someone could be hung like a horse, but Kurt is seriously hung like a-”

“ I get it,” he buries his face in his knees, “Please stop talking.”

“ Aw,” she coos, wrapping her arm around him, “No need to be embarrassed, Blaine-y bear. I'm just stating facts.”

“ Facts that I don't need to know,” he mumbles. He really,  _ really _ , didn't need to know.

“ Oh come on,” she leans her head against his shoulder, “We're friends now, right? Friends talk about these things!”

“ I never talked about Sebastian's dick with any of my friends,” he tells her. She cackles.

“ Well then you had lame friends. If you want you can talk to me about Sebastian's dick.”

He lifts his head and gapes at her, “You want me to tell you about my ex-boyfriend's dick?”

“ I told you about mine!”

“ We are not having this conversation,” he decides, “Man, it sure is cold for September. Do you think it'll warm up again in October?”

“ Fine, I get it,” she scoots back over to her side of the blanket, “Just promise me that when you sleep with Elliott you'll tell me if he's as big down there as he is everywhere else.”

“ Yeah, okay,” he says, just to get her off his back.

“ Pinky promise,” she insists, holding her pinky finger out to him. He sighs but wraps his own pinky around hers and they shake once. “Good. Now, tell me about that play you're doing for theater history. Something about a doctor?”

Blaine sighs in relief. A conversation that isn't about Kurt's cock. He can handle this a little better.

**

Blaine hates himself for every second that he spends thinking about Kurt's cock that night. He hates how clearly he can see it, how easy it is to paste the image that Tina had provided on to Kurt's naked body. He hates how badly he wants it, how hard it makes him, how quickly he comes once he gives in and starts palming himself roughly through his pants. He hates it.

 


	5. Chapter 5

It's Friday night, Blaine's just finished his first ever university midterm and he is well on his way to getting drunk with his friends. Both Kurt and Elliott seemed against the idea of letting Blaine have alcohol, but what Santana wants Santana gets, and apparently what she wants is to see Blaine drunk.

It's not happening as fast as she wants it to, Blaine can tell that much by the way she keeps glancing in his direction and scowling when she sees him with the same drink for longer than ten minutes. He doesn't quite know why she seems so insistent on getting him drunk, but she's offering him free alcohol, so he really isn't in a place to complain.

“ You guys are not getting drunk fast enough,” Santana complains loudly, making Blaine snort to himself. “Come on, let's play never have I ever.”

“ Why?” Tina asks from her spot on Kurt's lap, “We already know basically everything about each other.”

Santana's eyes gleam, “Exactly,” she then points at Blaine, “Except for this little nugget. He's been hanging out with us for over a month and I have yet to hear a word about his personal life from him.”

Elliott scoffs, “He's private. Leave him be.”

“ No,” Rachel sits up on the couch, “I want to get to know Blaine better too! Never have I ever, come on!”

Blaine shrugs, “Why not?” he hasn't been properly drunk since he and Sebastian broke up anyway. He's pretty sure he needs this.

Soon enough they're all in a circle, Blaine ironically squished between Kurt and Elliott on the couch, with Tina sitting on the arm of the couch next to Kurt, his arm wrapped around her waist. Blaine sort of wishes they weren't constantly touching. If they weren't constantly touching it would probably make everything a little easier on him, emotionally.

“ Okay, let's start things off with an easy one,” Santana leans forward, smirking at everyone, “Never have I ever had sex.”

“ You can't say something you  _ have _ done, Santana,” Rachel says, glaring, “That's totally against the rules.”

“ Not if I drink too,” Santana lifts her red solo cup to her lips and takes a long swig, then glances around the circle, “Come on, drink up, stop acting like a bunch of fucking virgins.”

Blaine sighs and drinks, glancing around the room to watch as everyone else does as well. He makes eye contact with Rachel and sees her face drop.

“ Dammit!” She shouts. Everyone stares at her, eyes wide in shock.

“ Ha!” Santana points at her, a far too smug grin on her face, “I told you the shy thing was just an act. Pay up Berry.”

“ Wait,” Blaine frowns, “What?”

“ Isn't it obvious?” Sam speaks up from his spot across from Blaine, “Rachel and Santana bet on whether or not you were a virgin.”

Blaine's jaw drops, “Seriously?”

“ What?” Rachel crosses her arms over her chest, “You don't talk much and you blush basically any time a guy makes eye contact with you. Plus you majorly geeked out when Kurt suggested Elliott was trying to fuck you. It all sort of adds up.”

Blaine pouts, “Maybe I'm just shy.”

“ It's always the innocent ones,” Santana says, extending a hand out to Rachel, “You'd know better than anyone. Now come on, pay up.”

Rachel grumbles but hands Santana a ten dollar bill. Santana takes it happily and stuffs it in her bra, “Thank you very much. Now, who’s next?”

Elliott sits up, “I'll go,” he glances around the room and smirks, “Never have I ever fingered a girl.”

Blaine watches as Sam, Santana, Kurt, and Rachel all drink, Rachel looking like she wants the earth to swallow her whole. Blaine keeps his eyes away from Kurt, not needing the mental image of Kurt fingering him into oblivion that threatens to enter his mind.

“ Um,” Blaine thinks for a moment, “Never have I ever gone skinny dipping.”

“ Seriously?” Kurt asks, lifting the drink to his lips, “Well, that just won't do.” Blaine catches his eye and sees – something. A flash. Something familiar, something he's only ever seen directed at him from two people. It's gone in a moment though, and Kurt is tapping his fingers against his drink before saying, “Never have I ever worn boat shoes at the beach.”

Blaine blushes in embarrassment and drinks, much to the delight of his friends. “That wasn't fair,” he pouts. Kurt chuckles, bumping their shoulders together.

“ Whoever said I played fair?”

Blaine looks away the second he feels his heart leap. No, this is supposed to be done. It's been a month, he's supposed to be over this by now. Why isn't he over this by now?

“ Never been skinny dipping, huh?” Elliott whispers in his ear, breath warm and pleasant, “We'll have to change that, now won't we?”

Blaine doesn't respond, just takes a swallow of his drink when Tina declares she's never gone more than a month without sex since losing her virginity. Kurt drinks as well, along with Rachel and Elliott. Sam and Santana high five each other and then high five Tina.

“ Okay,” Rachel takes a deep breath, “Never have I ever fantasized about anybody in this room.”

Blaine wonders if this is what being punched feels like. He takes a slow swallow of his drink, unable to avoid the quick glance he sends Kurt's way. He's pretty sure his heart stops working when his glance is met with an ice blue stare. Kurt doesn't look away as quickly as Blaine does, and Blaine can still feel him staring even after he's taken his drink.

He can feel Elliott staring too, and wishes more than anything that he could feel the same joy at Elliott's stare that he does at Kurt's.

_ It might not mean that _ he tells himself as Santana accuses Rachel of cheating by not drinking,  _ he just looked because he knows you've gotten yourself off thinking about him. He knows you're a pervert and he wants you to know that he knows _ .

The game ends soon after, Sam complaining that he never even got a turn before he downs the rest of his drink and passes out in the recliner he's sitting in. Santana announces that there's no way she's spending the night on the floor and hauls a tipsy Rachel out of the apartment, promising to call a cab and come back for her car in the morning.

“ You can sleep in my room again,” Elliott offers, “If you want to.”

Blaine nods, “Sure. Thanks.”

Tina wolf whistles and Elliott flips her off. Blaine announces that he's turning in and asks Elliott if he can borrow a pair of pajama pants and a shirt. Elliott agrees and bids Kurt and Tina goodnight. Blaine follows him into his room quickly, not quite sure if he can handle watching Kurt and Tina disappear into Kurt's room together.

**

It's late, Blaine knows that much, but he still can't sleep. He's been lying as still as possible in order not to wake Elliott, but his legs are growing restless and he's sure he's going to have to make a bathroom run soon.

He tries to keep his thoughts away from the moment when he and Kurt had looked at each other, not wanting to think about what that might mean. He can't give himself hope, not in this case. His hope is Tina's heartbreak, and even if Kurt were secretly in the closet he's not sure he could do that to his friend. Tina has been nothing but kind to him since they met. She's been a true fairy godmother. Blaine is sure there are far better ways to repay her than by stealing her boyfriend.

“ I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

Blaine's entire body flinches in surprise when Elliott speaks, his heart jumping into his throat, “Oh my god,” he whispers, “Jesus Christ, way to scare me half to death, holy shit.”

“ Sorry,” Elliott sounds sheepish and Blaine feels him shifting so he's on his side. “I thought you knew I was still awake.”

“ I didn't,” Blaine admits.

“ Well, then, I'm sorry for scaring you too.”

“ Don't be sorry,” Blaine whispers, shifting so he's on his side as well, facing Elliott. Their faces are close, almost too close. “You didn't make me feel uncomfortable.”

Through the dark he can see the corner of Elliott's lip turn up, “You sure?”

“ Promise. It's... kind of flattering.”

“ What is?” Elliott asks, innocence dripping from his voice.

“ You know,” Blaine can feel himself blush and hopes it's too dark for Elliott to see, “You thinking about me that way. It's flattering. I don't mind.”

Elliott frowns, “You? I was totally thinking about Sam when I drank.”

Blaine laughs, the sound far louder than he expected, and claps a hand over his mouth to stop the noise. “Sorry,” he whispers, still giggling.

“ Don't be,” Elliott whispers back, “I love hearing you laugh.”

Blaine blinks at him in the dark and wonders. It would be so easy. The easiest thing he'd ever done. He'd just have to extend his neck, close his eyes, and -

Elliott makes the decision for him. One moment they're staring at each other through the darkness and the next Elliott has shifted forward and his lips are pressed gently against Blaine's in the sweetest first kiss Blaine has ever experienced.

It doesn't last long, maybe five seconds at most, not long enough for Blaine to kiss back. Elliott pulls away, a soft squelch sounding when their lips separate.

“ Sorry,” Elliott whispers. “I shouldn't have done that.”

“ It's fine,” Blaine replies, slightly breathless. Because it is. It's fine. It was a good kiss. As good a kiss as any.

And yet.

“ I like you,” he tells Elliott honestly, “But, I'm-”

“ Still not ready?” Elliott asks. Blaine nods, unsure if Elliott can see him. “I figured. I should have asked. I really am sorry. I can go sleep on the couch, if you want.”

“ No, stay. It's okay, really.”

“ Are you sure?”

“ Yeah,” Blaine promises, reaching a hand out to tangle his fingers with Elliott, “I'm sure. And, for what it's worth, I'm sorry too.” Sorry he can't seem to feel even a tenth of what he feels for Kurt for Elliott. It would be so much easier if he did. How he wished he did.

“ Nothing to be sorry about.” Elliott squeezes his hand, “Let me know when you're ready, okay? I'll wait.”

Blaine nods, the only thought running through his mind being  _ you shouldn't _ .

**

“ You keep spending the night at that friend of yours' house I'm going to start thinking something's up.”

Blaine sighs, “Why can't I just like Elliott?” he asks, stabbing at his meatloaf with his fork, “Why can't I just get over my stupid rebound crush on Kurt and start liking Elliott? Elliott's actually gay, and he likes me. Kurt just sees me as this loser pet freshman his girlfriend decided to keep.”

Cooper rolls his eyes, “You don't get to choose who you like, Squirt.”

“ I know,” he frowns, pushing his food around on his plate, “It'd be so much easier if you did.”

Cooper laughs, shakes his head, “Ain't that the truth.”

 


	6. Chapter 6

Blaine's first set of midterms begin the last week of September and run until halfway through October, three weeks which he spends almost exclusively at the library. Tina and Santana drop by sometimes to keep him company, and Elliott brings him coffee every now and then (“As a sorry for kissing you and a good luck,” he says, every time). Kurt texts him once and asks him if he wants a study buddy, to which Blaine replies that he's already on the bus heading home and then quickly packs up to do just that in case Kurt comes to the library anyway.

The thing with midterms is that they provide a perfect distraction from his insufferable crush on Kurt. In fact, he rarely thinks about Kurt during the three weeks he hides away in the library under an endless pile of textbooks, and the few times he does are simply to contemplate on how little he's been thinking about Kurt lately.

It feels good, like a burden has been lifted. No more awkwardly avoiding eye contact with Kurt, no more looking away whenever he and Tina display any sort of affection, no more desperately trying to feel a flutter in his stomach whenever he sees Elliott. Being over Kurt means he's just one step closer to finally being able to return Elliott's feelings and starting up a happy and healthy relationship with him.

Of course, the minute he's done with his final midterm he walks out of the class and right into Kurt, the only other member of their little group who is done with midterms already, who's been waiting for him outside the door with a grin as big as his face and a congratulatory hug that sends Blaine right up to the moon. And just like that he's back to square one.

**

“ Okay, best sex you've ever had. Go.”

Blaine groans, Rachel blushes, and Elliott rolls his eyes, stretches his foot out and kicks Santana in the shin, “Why is everything about sex with you?”

Santana shrugs, entirely unapologetic, “I've got it on my mind,” she says, “Plus, you  _ never _ tell me about your private life, and Blainers never tells me anything at all, so there we go.”

“ I think I'm going to go make some more popcorn,” Rachel squeaks, standing up, only to be pulled right back down by Santana moments later.

“ Oh no you don't. I answered your stupid ass favorite flower question, now you have to admit to everyone that I'm the best sex you've ever had.”

“ _ Santana _ ,” Rachel screeches.

“ I'll go first,” Santana says, as if Rachel hadn't spoken, “The best sex I've ever had was last summer at that bonfire Sam held, you know, the one mid August? This blonde went down on me for literally an hour. Amazing.”

Her confession is met with silence, Blaine glancing awkwardly between Rachel and Santana, Elliott looking at his feet and Tina pursing her lips together tightly. Rachel's jaw sets as she stares at Santana, who raises a challenging eyebrow in her direction.

“ I knew it,” Rachel says, shaking her head, standing up, and walking out of Tina's living room with her hands clenched tightly at her side. Blaine watches her go, unsure of how to react. He's not very close with neither Rachel nor Santana, not the way he is with Tina, Elliott and – sometimes – Kurt, and he's not entirely sure what to do in this situation.

“ What the hell is wrong with you?” Tina says, leaning forward and smacking Santana's leg. Santana shrugs.

“ What? I was just-”

“ I don't care,” Tina hisses, “You know Rachel doesn't like this casual thing you've got going, why did you have to rub it in her face like that?”

Santana crosses her arms over her chest, “I wasn't. She just takes everything too personally.”

Elliott scoffs, “You just told her you had the best sex of your life with someone else at the same time that you were hooking up with her.” He shakes his head, “That's just cruel.”

Santana purses her lips and looks down at the ground. Blaine doesn't think he's ever seen someone look so guilty in his entire life. It's scary to see that sort of look on Santana. “I didn't,” she says, harsh but quiet.

“ What does that mean?”

“ It means I didn't do that, with the blonde. I mean, yeah, it happened, but it was three summers ago, while I was getting over Britt.” She sighs, “I haven't been with anyone but Rachel since we started hooking up.”

“ Then go fucking tell her that,” Tina screeches, “Before she starts to think you really don't give a shit about her.”

Elliott nods, taking a bite of pizza, “You sure have a knack for fucking things up, San.”

Santana rolls her eyes, but stands up, “Fine. I'll go talk to her, or whatever. But if things get fucked up I'm blaming you guys.”

Tina shrugs, “Whatever gets you through the night. Go, get out of here, Christ.”

Santana leaves the way Rachel did and Blaine, Tina, and Elliott watch her go. “Those girls are giving me a migraine,” Elliott says, “They're worse than you and Kurt.”

Blaine looks up, eyes wide, blush already spreading over his cheeks, only to find Elliott looking at Tina. Tina takes a bite of her own pizza, a blush on her own cheeks.

“ That wasn't my fault,” she says, pointing her nose in the air, “He was doing that weird 'am I aren't I' thing, the fucker,” she shakes her head and Elliott nods accordingly, as if what she just said makes any sense whatsoever. Blaine doesn't ask though, just nods along as well, as if he knows what they're talking about, “Plus we were dealing with the whole Rachel aspect of it all, and the fact that he was dating...” she snaps her fingers, “God, who was he dating?”

“ Blonde,” is all Elliott replies to that, “Really fit. British, I think.”

“ Yep, he was dating the blonde. So really, all things considered, they have it much easier than Kurt and I did. They're just being assholes.”

Elliott shrugs, “I guess. Anyway,” he rubs his hands together and points at Blaine, “Best sex you've ever had.”

Blaine's jaw drops, “Um,” he glances between them, “Santana left, can't we just go back to talking about how Tina and Kurt got together?”

“ No, he's right, enough gossip. Come on, don't go all virginal on us now.”

Blaine flushes, “Santana was the one who wanted to know,” he pouts, crossing his arms.

“ Ugh, whatever, fine, I'll go,” Elliott sits up straighter, “The best sex I've ever had was with that Japanese exchange student last year.”

“ I knew you hooked up with him!” Tina exclaims, “Oh my god, what happened?! I can't believe you've held out on me for this long.”

“ He was just-” Elliott exhales, a smile spreading across his face. “I don't even know how to explain it. It was good though. Like, really good. Like, three times in one night good.”

He should feel jealous. Sitting here, listening to Elliott talk about the best sex he's ever had, Blaine knows he should feel jealousy creeping its way up his spine. He should want to find whoever this exchange student was and rip him limb from limb for sleeping with Elliott. He should be pushing Elliott into the bathroom and showing him just how much better he is.

He doesn't. He feels... indifferent. So Elliott had amazing sex with a Japanese exchange student. Who cares? Good for him.

“ Damn,” Tina whistles, “ _ But _ ,” she singsongs, “I've got one better.”

“ Oh really?” Elliott asks, raising both eyebrows, “Better than three times in one night?”

“ Five times,” Tina says, smiling proudly, “Five times, in one night.”

“ Shit,” Elliott's jaw drops, “Both of you?”

“ Yep,” she raises her arms over her head, “We basically did everything there is to do, it was  _ so good _ .”

Blaine clears his throat, “With Kurt?” he asks, voice quiet and shy.

“ Obviously,” Tina says, “God, when I think back on the sex I had before I was with Kurt I wonder how I ever thought it was good.”

There it is. There's the jealousy.

“ Don't tell Kurt that,” Elliott warns, picking up another slice of pizza, “His ego's big enough already, I'm pretty sure if you tell him he's the best you've ever had his head will explode.”

Tina grins, “Oh, he already knows. It's kind of hard to keep something like that a secret when you're so fucked out your brain is melting out of your ear.”

Blaine coughs, “Okay, I think I'm ready to go now.”

Tina and Elliott clap their hands together in excitement, but before Blaine can start Santana's voice drifts into the living room from the hallway, “Hold on,” she says, hurrying into the living room, Rachel behind her, hands clasped tightly together, “I missed Elliott's but there's absolutely no way I'm missing this one.”

Blaine smiles at them, “Did you two-”

“ Doesn't matter, come on, best sex you've ever had, I need to know. Be as explicit as possible.”

Rachel rolls her eyes as they sit back down on the couch, leaning her head against Santana's shoulder. Blaine shares a smile with her before steeling himself, “Um, okay. Best sex I've ever had,” he thinks back to his two years with Sebastian, to all the times that have just blurred into one. He tries to think, really think, but the only memorable time he can come up with is- “Okay, well, I don't know if this counts as the best sex I've ever had, but it's the most memorable one,” he takes a deep breath, “The one time my ex, Sebastian, and I, went to this club and he got really drunk. When we got back to school he-” he hates this word, he hates it, but what other word is there, “-blew me for like, two hours. That was pretty great.”

Elliott's jaw drops, “Two  _ hours _ ?! What the hell, and you lasted that long?!”

Blaine blushes, “Well, no, obviously, but every time I, you know,” he makes a vague gesture with his hand, “He just stayed down there and kept at it until I was, um, hard. Again. Yeah.”

“ Shit,” Tina's mouth is hanging open as well, “Didn't he get lockjaw or something? How can someone have a dick in their mouth for two hours without it hurting like a bitch?”

Blaine shrugs, “He was really drunk. I guess it dulled the pain? The next day he said it hurt a bit, but he was really proud of himself, so.”

Santana stares at him, eyes wide, “How the hell did you manage to make a blowjob sound cute?” she asks, shaking her head, “Why the hell is everything so adorable with you? I actually don't think I can handle this much cuteness in my life, you're going to have to leave.”

“ Santana,” Rachel chides gently. Blaine frowns. He's not sure if that was a compliment or not.

“ Okay, whatever, we've wasted too much of girls night on this stupid ass question,” Tina says, “Come on, let's play charades or something.”

“ I missed Elliott's though,” Santana complains, “And yours, but we all know yours is that time you and Kurt fucked five times in a row.”

Tina huffs, “Maybe it was a different time.”

“ It wasn't,” Elliott says, and then he smirks at Santana, “And mine was Jay.”

Santana fist pumps, “I knew it! Evans owes me so much money.”

Blaine chuckles and reaches for a piece of pizza, trying to get the image of Kurt fucking him five times in a row out of his mind.

**

“ Hey there,” Kurt says the next morning, leaning on the doorway with a smirk on his face and sunglasses perched on the top of his head, “How was your first girls night?”

Blaine flushes, still in his pajamas, hair a mess, “Good. Santana and Rachel got together.”

“ Finally,” Kurt says, “Hey, is Tina up yet? She promised me crepes.”

Blaine glances back to the living room where Santana, Rachel, Elliott, and Tina are sprawled out across the floor, still deep in sleep, “Not yet, but I can make you some crepes, if you want? I was going to make everyone breakfast anyway.”

Kurt grins, “Sounds amazing. You going to let me in now?”

“ Right, yeah,” Blaine moves out of the way, letting Kurt through and then follows him to the kitchen. He tries not to notice the way Kurt's jeans mold perfectly to his ass, but it's a wasted effort. “You look way too put together for a Saturday morning.”

“ What can I say,” Kurt looks over his shoulders, “Every moment is an opportunity for fashion. Plus, it's not like it's seven AM.”

Blaine nods, “Spoken like a true fashion major,” he says, “Do you know where everything is here? Because I have no idea.”

“ Yeah,” Kurt starts rooting around in the cabinets, “We just need flour, milk, eggs, and butter, right?”

“ I think so, yeah,” Blaine nods, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Kurt looks so at home in this kitchen, of course he does. It's his girlfriend's kitchen. He's probably been here a thousand times.

They work in silence, Kurt handing Blaine ingredients and Blaine mixing them together in a bowl. Kurt goes to heat up the stove, watching Blaine quietly as he stirs.

“ Hey,” Kurt says, breaking the silence, “What's that on your nose?”

Blaine frowns, “What-” Kurt leans in close, scoops a little bit of batter onto his finger and dabs it onto Blaine's nose.

It's such a silly action, so trivial and dumb. A joke, but also a small show of intimacy. Blaine stares at Kurt, at his eyes filled with mirth and joy, lips full, the bottom one trapped under his teeth to keep him from smiling. He's perfect, he's beautiful, he's taken and his girlfriend is asleep not twenty feet away, but he's so amazing and all Blaine can think is  _ I love you _ .

_ I love you _ .

“ Blaine?” Kurt asks, “Hey, you okay?”

_ No _ , “Yeah, sorry. Just spaced out for a second.” He rubs the batter off his nose, “Sorry, it's still early.”

“ Okay,” Kurt says hesitantly, “You're sure-”

“ Can you start pouring these on the pan?”

Kurt nods, chewing on his bottom lip and taking the batter from Blaine. Blaine sighs quietly. This is definitely not the way his freshman year was supposed to go.

 


	7. Chapter 7

“ What are you doing exactly one month from today?”

Blaine looks up from the History of Theater paper he's working on to see Tina staring at him from across his table at the library, “Studying for exams, probably? Working on my final dance routine for Miss July? Why?”

“ Because,” she drawls, falling into the seat in front of him, “Kurt, Elliott, San, Rachel, Sam, and I always go skiing the weekend before exam season starts. One last hoorah before we bury ourselves in textbooks. You in?”

“ I- Really?” Blaine asks, lowering the lid on his laptop, “You guys wouldn't mind?”

“ Why the hell would we invite you if we'd mind?” she kicks his ankle under the table lightly, smiling, “We want you to come. It's going to be a blast.”

He purses his lips, “And it's not just going to be you and Kurt and Santana and Rachel being all lovey-dovey while Elliott, Sam, and I watch uncomfortably?”

She gasps, “I am appalled by the insinuation that we would exclude you,” her lips curve into a smirk, “Besides, you know it could be Kurt and I, Santana and Rachel, and you and Elliott excluding Sam, right?”

Blaine flushes, “I- yeah. I know. It's just-”

“ Yeah, yeah, I know, heard it a thousand times. I'm just saying,” her smirk fades into a soft smile, “Elliott really likes you. And I know you like him. Stop dragging your feet.”

He looks down at the lid of his laptop. How he wishes it were that simple.

“ I can count you in?” she asks, standing up, “Kurt and I are getting the train tickets and booking the resort tonight.”

Blaine nods, “Yeah, okay. Count me in.”

“ Awesome,” she reaches over the table and ruffles his hair, “I'm so excited! This is going to be so awesome.”

“ Yeah,” Blaine replies, watching her go. Spending an entire weekend watching Tina and Kurt make eyes at each other and make out in the snow, “So awesome.”

**

“ Hey,” Kurt drops into the chair across from Blaine in the library, grinning far too wide, “I have something for you.”

Blaine frowns, placing his highlighter in the middle of his copy of Othello and closing the book, “What is it?”

Kurt hands him an envelope, “Train ticket,” he explains happily, “And the confirmation for your hotel room is in there too. A single, for a boring single.”

“ God, you too?” Blaine huffs, taking the envelope. Kurt shrugs coyly.

“ What can I say? I want my best friend to be happy, and I know you'd make him happy,” his coy smile softens, “I want you to be happy too. I know you keep saying you're still getting over that asshole ex of yours, but...”

He's not, he wants to tell him. He's been over Sebastian for months. Honestly, he barely thinks about him anymore. Barely thought about him in the first place. “I'm just not ready,” he says instead, “I- I thought Sebastian was the love of my life, you know? I wanted him to be so badly. How romantic, to marry your high school sweetheart.”

Kurt snorts, “Thank god I won't be marrying mine,” he shakes his head, “Yikes, that one was a piece of work.”

“ Yeah,” he shakes his head, “It's okay though. Sebastian's... he's horrible. I'm glad I won't be marrying him either. It still hurts though.”

“ Got it. Won't mention it again.”

Blaine chuckles, “I appreciate it.”

“ Alright, I gotta dash. Tina's helping me with this dress I'm working on. I'll see you soon?”

Blaine nods, “Of course,” and holds in the deep exhale that threatens to escape as Kurt walks away, waving over his shoulder as he goes.

The love of his life. He can't believe he used to think that was Sebastian, with his drinking and all the other boys who came before. He can't believe how deeply his feelings for the boy used to run; although he isn't surprised at how quickly they disappeared when Sebastian broke up with him.

The thing is, Kurt can't be the love of his life either. Yes, he's a far better person that Sebastian will ever be (he's pretty sure Kurt would never string a girl along all summer only to break up with her right at the end by telling her he just wanted a sure thing), but that doesn't really matter. Kurt's straight. He's really straight. High school sweetheart, dated his best friend, rebounded with a blonde and then met his current girlfriend and soulmate straight. He's not the love of Blaine's life any more than Sebastian was.

Of course, that knowledge doesn't stop Blaine from hoping, nor does it stop his heart from jumping out of his chest when Kurt glances back at him one last time before exiting the library.

**

It's Monday and Kurt is waiting for him right outside his classroom, soft looking cardigan stretching his shoulders and tight, tight jeans clinging to his thighs. “Ready to head home?” Kurt asks, raising an eyebrow at him, smiling at a girl who walks past them with a blush across her face.

“ Yeah,” he nods, shifting his messenger bag further up his shoulder, “You know you don't have to-”

“ Keep doing this, yeah, I know,” Kurt rolls his eyes, “Keep saying that and I'm going to start thinking you don't want to spend time with me. I'll be really offended.”

“ That's not it,” Blaine assures quickly,  _ god, it's really not it _ , “It's just really out of the way.”

“ What it is is the only alone time I get to spend with you all week,” Kurt retorts, “I need my Blaine time, okay? Tina's always stealing you away, plus I know as soon as you and Elliott get your shit together you'll suddenly be busy all the time. I'm cashing in early.”

Blaine can't help but chuckle and blush at that. “I'd still hang out with you, you know. If Elliott and I...”

“ _ If?”  _ Kurt asks, shaking his head, hands digging deep into his pockets, “I think you mean  _ when _ mister. I'm not letting you break my best friend's heart with those 'if's' of yours.”

“ I'm sure Elliott could find someone twice as hot as me in, like, a day,” he says, rolling his eyes at the thought. Honestly, he's surprised he hasn't already.

“ Right,” Kurt says, chuckling and nudging Blaine with his elbow, “Blaine, I don't know if you realize this, but you're like, super hot. Like, really, really hot.”

“ Ha!” Blaine can't help but exclaim, “Means a lot coming from a straight guy.”

Kurt frowns, and opens his mouth as if about to say something, then frowns when he notices something up ahead, “Oh shit,” he whispers, grabbing onto Blaine's hand, “Shit, fuck, where can we hide, this is not good.”

“ What are you doing?” he asks, at the same time that someone calls out, “Kurt?” from ahead of them. Blaine looks up to see a blond man, brow furrowed, jogging up toward them. Kurt whispers another, “Fuck,” under his breath, clutching tightly at Blaine's arm and positioning himself slightly behind him, as if there were even a chance that Blaine's smaller stature could hide him. Blaine doesn't say anything, just purses his lips in confusion.

“ Hey, Adam,” Kurt says, his voice the very definition of awkward. “What are you doing here?”

The man, Adam, chuckles, “I go here,” he says, pointing to the messenger bag at his side, “I'm in my first year for my masters.”

“ I thought you were going to New York for that,” Kurt replies through gritted teeth. Adam shrugs.

“ That was the plan, but it fell through. I, um. Wow, I haven't seen you for a while.”

“ Yeah, well, I've been busy,” Kurt says, “Actually, I'm sort of late, Blaine and I really have to get going, but it was great to see you, really, it was.”

Adam narrows his eyes, “Blaine, huh?” he looks Blaine over, “So you're back on our side now, is it?”

Blaine frowns, glancing back at Kurt who is glaring daggers at Adam, “I never left.”

“ Oh, really? What about that girl you were so infatuated with?”

“ God, how many times do I have to explain-”

“ No, it's fine. I saw you with him and thought – but no, you're still confused. I should have known.”

Kurt sets his jaw and Blaine can feel him tensing behind him, “Listen, asshole-”

“ Okay,” Blaine says, feeling the tension rising far too quick for his liking, “We're going to be late to that movie we're catching,” he wraps a hand around Kurt's wrist and starts dragging him away, “Great meeting you Adam.”

“ Yeah, I'm sure it was,” Adam bites back, narrowed eyes never leaving Kurt's as Kurt and Blaine back away. Blaine makes sure to pull Kurt as far away from the blond as quickly as possible, not wanting things to get out of hand.

As soon as their out of hearing range of Adam he asks, “Who the hell was that and what the hell was he talking about?”

Kurt just shakes his head, “I can't believe that asshole,” he says instead of a reply, “Walking up to me like nothing fucking happened.” He's seething, and Blaine wants to make it go away but he doesn't know how, he doesn't understand  _ anything _ .

“ Maybe I should drive today,” he says carefully, “You're pretty shook up.”

Kurt sighs, and tosses him the keys to Elliott's car, “You're probably right,” he whispers, “I just can't –  _ god _ .”

“ It's okay,” Blaine reassures. Kurt sighs again.

“ You understand, right? I mean, what you said before – you get it, right? Why I'm so pissed?”

Blaine swallows thickly and nods even though he has absolutely no clue, “Of course. You have every right to be pissed,” he assures. Kurt smiles in thanks, then starts leading them in the direction of the school's parking garage. Blaine follows dutifully, thoughts turning over what had just happened in his mind over and over again, unable to make any sense of it.

_ Whatever _ he thinks as he climbs into the drivers seat of Elliott's car, waiting until Kurt is safely in the passenger's seat to start it up. It's not that big of a deal anyway.

**

“ Isn't it a bit cold for this?” Blaine can't help but ask as he helps Elliott unload his surfboard from the trunk. Elliott scoffs, as if Blaine has mortally offended him.

“ Bit cold? For surfing?” he shakes his head, “No, man, it's  _ never _ too cold for surfing. Surfing is a year long sport here.”

“ You're going to catch your death out there,” Blaine says, huffing and crossing his arms over his chest. Elliott smiles down at him, holding his surfboard close to his side.

“ Aw, are you worried about me?”

Is he? Blaine thinks about it for a moment and – yes. Yes, he is worried about Elliott. The thought makes him beam. He's worried about  _ Elliott _ . “Maybe I am.”

Elliott coos and boops him on the nose, “Well, no need. I've surfed in worse conditions.”

Blaine chews on his bottom lip, still reeling from this new revelation. This is amazing. It's fantastic. It's-

“ Get your ass moving loser or we'll miss all the big waves!”

-Nothing, absolutely nothing compared to how he feels about Kurt.  _ Dammit. _

“ Come back in one piece, okay?” Blaine asks, trying to regain the feeling he had before Kurt spoke. He's sure it's still there, barely, but there, he just has to reach out and take hold of it, let it grow until it overpowers the part of him that's in love with Kurt. He can do it. He knows he can.

“ I promise,” Elliott says, leaning down and for a moment Blaine is worried he's going to kiss him again and he doesn't know what to do, doesn't know how to act – but at the last moment Elliott changes course and presses his lips firmly to Blaine's cheek. Blaine can't help the soft exhale of relief that escapes his lips and he really hopes it sounds more like a happy sigh to Elliott. Elliott smiles at him as he moves away and starts his mad dash towards the waves

Blaine watches him go and raises a hand to his cheek where the sensation of Elliott's lips is rapidly fading. The first time Sebastian kissed him on the cheek he felt it for days.

“ Look at you two,” Tina says, hair flying wildly in the wind and holding her cardigan close to her body, “Getting your act together.”

Blaine shrugs, still watching Kurt and Elliott as they wade into the water with far too much enthusiasm considering it's nearing mid-November. “Maybe,” he says evasively, “I don't know. I guess we'll see.”

“ Oh!” Tina inks their arms together and pulls him close, “Do you think something will happen on the ski trip? It's coming up pretty quick.”

Blaine sighs. Yeah, the ski trip. He has to finish three assignments and begin plotting out his final dance routine for Cassie July's class before the trip. The ski trip where Kurt and Tina will spend the entire time huddled together under blankets and sipping hot cocoa while everyone side eyes Blaine and Elliott encouragingly and silently ask him why the hell he isn't getting on with it already.

“ Who knows,” Blaine replies, holding her closer, “This is ridiculous. It's November, why the hell are they in the water. They're going to catch pneumonia.”

Tina laughs and presses her face into Blaine's shoulder, “They're big boys. In more ways than one. Speaking of which-”

“ Tina, for the last time, even if I do sleep with Elliott I'm still not telling you the size of his penis.”

“ Come  _ on _ . I've told you about Kurt's!”

“ Yeah, and I never asked you to do that,” Blaine shakes his head. Tina huffs.

“ I'm just trying to bond here. Lately it feels like you're spending more time with Kurt than you are with me.”

Blaine turns to look at her and sees her pouting up at him. He chuckles and pulls her into a hug, “Don't worry,” he says, heart clenching, “You're still my number one girl.”

“ I better be,” she says, chin rising into the air, “Now come on, let's go get a better view of our boys getting their surf on.”

Blaine chuckles, and doesn't feel the need to correct her. What's the point? If all goes as he hopes (and he really, really hopes it does) it'll be true soon enough.

 


	8. Chapter 8

It's quite chilly the day that Elliott drives up to Blaine and Cooper's house to pick Blaine up for the ski trip. Not chilly enough to warrant Blaine wearing all his winter gear, but chilly enough that he can get away with it.

He waves goodbye to Cooper and places his suitcase in the trunk before slipping into the passenger's seat and being greeted by a far too happy Elliott.

“ Why are you smiling at me like that?”

“ You just look super cute in your parka, that's all,” Elliott says, still smiling like he's the most adorable thing he's ever seen. Blaine huffs.

“ Well, I didn't have enough room for it in my suitcase,” he replies, pouting and crossing his arms as well as he can in the coat. Elliott laughs at that, shaking his head and getting the car started. Blaine pouts for at least the first five minutes they're in the car.

It gets warm in the car pretty soon, but Blaine refuses to take everything off only to have to put everything back on again when they get to the train station. “I can turn the heat down, if you want,” Elliott offers.

Blaine shakes his head, “It's only a twenty minute drive. It's okay.”

Elliott shrugs and starts asking him about his final assignments and how he thinks he did. Blaine relishes the neutral topic and spends as much of the car ride as he can talking about how frustrating his final paper for History of Musical Theater had been and how much he's struggling with putting together his final dance for Miss July. Elliott listens attentively, commenting every now and then but mostly just nodding his head and smiling.

It isn't until they reach the train station that Elliott turns to look at Blaine with a slight grimace on his face, “Okay, so before we go in there, there's something you need to know.”

Blaine sighs heavily, already sure what he's going to say, “Let me guess. Kurt, Tina, and Rachel are trying to use this weekend as a way to get us together.”

Elliott winces, “I may or may not have told Kurt that I kissed you that one time.”

“ Oh,” Blaine says, pursing his lips together.

“ Yeah,” Elliott sighs, “I'm sorry if you didn't want anyone to know, I was drunk and he was bugging me about it, and it sort of slipped out.”

“ It's okay,” Blaine assures, even though he's not really sure it is, “It's stupid to pretend it didn't happen.”

Elliott pouts, “But we've been doing so well.”

Blaine chuckles, “Yeah,” he says quietly, “Elliott, I-”

“ Don't say it,” Elliott puts a hand up, “I know you're not ready, I don't need to hear it again,” he looks so serious that it breaks Blaine's heart a little, “I just thought I should warn you so you're not surprised if we end up stuck on the ski lift for half an hour, or locked in a closet together. That's all.”

“ Thanks,” Blaine whispers. He looks up at Elliott, stares at him for a bit, then wonders aloud, “Why are you being so patient with me?”

“ What do you mean?”

Blaine shrugs, “Just... you could have anyone. I'm sure you could have hooked up with like, ten different guys in the past few months.”

“ So? I don't want to hook up with those guys.”

“ But why not? What's so special about me? Why bother waiting for me? For all you know I could be terrible in bed.”

Elliott laughs out loud at that, “Okay, first of all, I highly doubt that. Have you seen your ass?” Blaine blushes at that, “Secondly, I'm waiting because I don't just want sex with you,” he turns more, so his entire body faces Blaine, “I've done the casual sex thing and as fun as it was it's not something I want forever. I want a boyfriend. I want commitment. Someone to come home to every night, to make breakfast for.”

Blaine purses his lips, heart banging in his chest as he whispers, “A sure thing.”

“ No,” Elliott says instantly, “An intimate thing. A sacred thing. Something to build a relationship on.”

“ How do you know I'm the one you want that with?” Blaine presses, “What if I say that I'll go out with you and we date for a week and then realize we're awful for each other and you resent me forever for wasting your time.”

“ That would really suck, but at the same time that's life. I'm not exactly expecting us to get married here, Blaine. I like you and you like me. That's all.”

“ But what if-”

Elliott leans forward and kisses him, hands cupping Blaine's face, lips chapped, the scent of his cologne invading Blaine's nose. Blaine's eyes clamp shut and he kisses back softly. Elliott breaks the kiss mere seconds after he initiates it, the soft sound of their lips parting filling the car.

“ Sorry,” Elliott whispers, “I keep doing that even though you – sorry.”

“ It's um,” Blaine clears his throat, eyes still shut, lips tingling, “It's okay.” He opens his eyes slowly, but keeps them on his lap, “I know this is really selfish but... can you let me think about this? For the weekend?”

“ Blaine, you can think about this for as long as you-”

“ No,” Blaine shakes his head, “This weekend. That's it. If by the end of the weekend I've realized I'm still not ready I want you to start dating other guys. It's not fair of me to keep leading you on like this. Promise me that if by the end of the weekend I say no you'll start seeing other people.”

Elliott sighs, “I don't know if I can.”

“ Fine, then at least promise you'll stop waiting for me. Promise you'll look around, that you'll say yes if a guy asks you out. Promise, okay?”

“ If, right? If.”

Blaine smiles at the hope in Elliott's voice and hates himself for it, “If.”

“ Alright,” Elliott claps his hands together, “One more weekend of uncertainty. I can't say I won't be glad to have a definitive answer.”

“ Elliott, I'm so-”

“ Don't, I'm just teasing you. Now, let's get out of here, you look like you're about to spontaneously combust.”

**

Kurt spots them first and, much to Blaine's embarrassment, promptly greets them by saying, “You look like a burnt marshmallow.”

“ It was hot in Elliott's car,” Blaine grumbles. Santana laughs at him while Tina rushes up to hug him and assure him that he looks like a very  _ cute _ burnt marshmallow. Kurt just grins at him, the way he tends to do, and Blaine knows he might as well just tell Elliott right here and now that it's never going to work out between them.

“ You're acting like you haven't seen him for months,” Santana says, rolling her eyes when Tina continues to cling to Blaine far longer than necessary, “Plus your boyfriend is right here, don't you think you should stop draping yourself all over another guy.”

“ What are you talking about,” Tina shoots back, “Blaine  _ is  _ my boyfriend. Didn't you know?”

Kurt scoffs, “Watch it missy,” he says, causing Tina to giggle against Blaine's shoulder. Blaine smiles thinly, prying Tina off him.

“ I'm sorry Tina, it's just not working between us,” he says, shaking his head, “I'm afraid you'll have to return to the boyfriend you had before I came around.”

Tina gasps and jumps away from him, “You're breaking up with me?!”

“ Damn right,” Kurt mutters, pulling her to his side and burying his face in her neck, “You better not have gotten up to any funny business during our thirty second break up.”

“ Cross my heart,” Tina assures, pushing herself up on her tip toes and kissing him gently. Blaine glances at Elliott and notices he's already looking his way. He looks away immediately.

**

The train ride is short, and the bus ride up to the ski lodge is even shorter. Soon enough all seven of them are piling out of the bus, suitcases dragging behind them, and checking in. Kurt and Tina have booked them all rooms on the same floor, five single rooms with king beds. Blaine takes his room key without looking up at Kurt, who he knows is sharing a room with Tina. With his luck it'll probably be the one right beside his, too.

It is the one beside his, and he also has the privilege of having Rachel and Santana on the opposite side. Sam and Elliott are both across the hall and Blaine only hates them a little bit for it.

Still, he convinces himself as he puts his suitcase on the floor next to his bed, he's determined to have a good time. He's here to relax right before his first ever college exams, and dammit he's going to relax no matter how loud the couples on either side of him have sex at night.

**

Santana knocks on his door about three minutes after he's taken all his winter gear off, letting him know that they're hitting the slopes in fifteen minutes so he better get ready. Blaine quickly re-dresses himself, grumbling as he does, and is ready within ten minutes.

He waits with Santana and Rachel outside, ignoring the sweet smiles they keep sharing and the kisses they exchange. He tries to picture himself and Elliott doing the same, but keeps chuckling at the image of him having to stretch to the very tip of his toes and still not being able to reach. It's such a ridiculous image that he keeps laughing quietly under his breath until the rest of their friends join them.

“ I think Blaine's gotten into his mini fridge already,” Kurt comments as they walk towards the slope, “What's so funny, giggle monster?”

Blaine just shakes his head, “It's nothing. Just thinking about a video I saw on youtube.”

“ What was it about?” Sam asks instantly, “I've probably seen it.”

Blaine shakes his head again, “It's stupid. It's about nothing. Just ignore me.”

“ Oh,” Sam shrugs, “Okay. Whatever.”

“ You're so weird Anderson,” Tina proclaims from her place under Kurt's arms, “It's a good thing we love you, huh?”

Blaine chuckles, “Thank god for that.”

**

Just as Elliott predicted, he and Blaine are stuck riding the lift with each other every time, and it doesn't take long for Santana to start 'accidentally' skiing too close to them and causing Blaine to fall right into Elliott's arms.

“ I warned you,” Elliott teases, making Blaine blush more than ever. Everyone else seems to find it hilarious and spend the rest of the evening weaving as close to Blaine and Elliott as possible without hitting them, causing both to stumble and end up in laughing heaps on the snow more often than is absolutely necessary.

Blaine's heart aches on their second to last run when Tina takes a tumble and Kurt is by her side in an instant, rubbing her back and whispering words of assurance in her ear. It doesn't surprise Blaine that she's up almost as quickly as she fell down. He'd be up in moments if he had Kurt whispering encouragements in his ear.

Overall it's far more enjoyable than Blaine expected it to be. He's almost disappointed when Santana calls it a day, announcing loudly that she can't feel her tits and is in some desperate need for some hot cocoa. Blaine lets Elliott carry his ski's back to the rental shop, ignoring the cat calls they get from their friends for it.

Not bad for the first day.

**

Blaine wakes up the next morning to someone banging incessantly on his door. He gets up reluctantly, rubbing his hands over his eyes in an effort to wake up before opening the door with an clipped, “What?”

It's Kurt on the other side, hand still formed into a fist, eyes dark as they travel down to Blaine's chest. Blaine crosses his arms over said chest, instantly regretting not taking a moment to put a shirt on.

“ Santana wanted me to wake you,” Kurt says, eyes on Blaine's naked chest, “She says she wants to get her ski on but doesn't want to leave you behind.”

“ That's sweet,” Blaine admits quietly, “Give me a few minutes to get dressed.”

“ Right,” Kurt nods, “Yeah, okay.” He continues to stare for a couple of moments, then shakes his head and walks away. Blaine watches him go, chewing on his bottom lip, then closes the door behind him and starts getting ready.

**

The day passes faster than Blaine expected it to. He loses himself to the thrill of skiing, something he hasn't indulged in for quite some time. He cuddles close to Elliott for warmth as they ride of the ski lift, laughs when Sam face plants for the third time, and races Rachel down the hill. It's the most fun he's had in far too long, and he isn't sure he's ready for it to end.

They call it a day at around eight, though this time it's Kurt who announces that he's done and ushers the rest of them off the slope and back to the lodge.

Blaine pouts the entire way, only to be teased relentlessly about it by Santana. Elliott carries his ski's again, even though this time Blaine puts up a fight, insisting that he should carry Elliott's this time around. Elliott looks at him like he's crazy and then calmly and very seriously tells him that it's no trouble at all, and besides, he's much bigger and stronger than Blaine anyway. It's true, and Blaine knows it, but he still pouts even harder than before.

He tells everyone he's going to change into something more comfortable and escapes to his room, letting his pout fade into a soft smile. He doesn't know what he deserved to be in this place with these people, but he's happy he did it.

He changes slowly, muscles aching in the best way after an entire day of strenuous activity. As he changes he thinks. Thinks about what he's going to tell Elliott the next day when he inevitably asks what decision he's reached. Thinks about the way his stomach flutters and his heart aches whenever he sees Kurt. Thinks about how little work he's done on Miss July's final dance presentation. Thinks about if he's going home for the holidays or if he should try and convince his parents to come up to LA. Thinks about Kurt a little more. Forces himself to think more about his dance presentation for Miss July.

He knows there's an empty ball room on the main floor, he's seen it every time he walks through the lobby on his way to the slopes. He'll just practice his routine for a little bit, just run through it once. Just long enough to get his mind off Kurt and Elliott and the mess that has become his heart.

**

Blaine is mid-spin when a familiar voice calls out, “There you are.” He finishes the spin and turns, cheeks heating up at the sight of Kurt leaning against the doorway of the ball room. He's wearing tight yoga pants and a comfy looking brown sweater that Blaine wants to bury himself in.

“ Hey,” he greets, trying to catch his breath. “What are you doing here?”

“ Looking for you, silly,” Kurt walks into the ballroom, his footsteps in perfect sync with Blaine's heartbeat. “Santana's whipping up some of her grandma's famous hot cocoa. Didn't want you to miss it.”

“ Right,” Blaine smiles, already feeling warmth bloom in his stomach, “Well, here I am. I'm just working on this move for my final dance performance.”

“ Blaine,” Kurt laughs, coming one step closer than Blaine expected him to, “The point of this vacation is to not worry about school stuff. Give it a rest, that move will wait.”

“ I know,” Blaine runs a hand through his hair, hoping Kurt doesn't notice how sweaty and disgusting he is, “I'll be there in a sec, alright?”

“ Nope,” Kurt takes his hands and for a moment everything stops. Nothing matters other than Kurt and Kurt's hands holding Blaine's, loose but still perfect. It's only a moment, before Kurt brings him back to reality by continuing with, “Tina would kill me if she knew I let you work on school stuff during ski time.”

“ Right. Sorry, I really want to get the move down by tonight so I don't have to worry about it later. I'm almost done and then I'll come meet you guys, I swear.”

Kurt sighs and drops Blaine's hands. They still feel warm. “Fine. But if you're doing this, then I'm helping you.”

“ What?”

“ I took this class two years ago; I'm in musical theater too, remember?” he chuckles, shaking his head, “Plus, I already know what's stumping you.”

He takes a step closer and Blaine's throat closes up, “What?” he rasps out. Kurt feels so much taller this close. The perfect height for Blaine to rest his face in the curve of his neck should they embrace.

“ It's your hips,” Kurt says, hands falling to Blaine's hips as if it were nothing, “You need to twist them more. Like this,” he moves Blaine's hips gently from side to side, “See? Smoother.”

“ Right,” Blaine breathes. He wants Kurt's hands on his hips forever.

“ Now you try.” And just like that they're gone, leaving their warmth behind them for a mere second. Blaine takes a step back and spins, imagining Kurt's hands on his hips again. “There. Perfect.”

“ Yeah,” Blaine feels as though he's just run a marathon, “Perfect.”

Kurt doesn't move, keeping his eyes locked on Blaine's, and there's that flicker again. That flicker that lights hope in Blaine's heart, that flicker that makes him wonder, makes him think that maybe, just maybe. But, as always, it's gone as soon as it comes, and Blaine is left breathless and alone.

“ Let's get going then,” Kurt says, sounding perfectly put together, completely unaware that he just tore Blaine's world apart and reconstructed it in a second, “Hot cocoa should be done by now.”

“ Kurt,” Blaine blurts, not wanting this to end. He hasn't gotten a moment alone with Kurt since they've arrived and he needs this to last at least two seconds longer more than he needs to breathe. Kurt raises his eyebrows, smiling that beautiful smile and all Blaine can think is  _ IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou _ , “Thanks,” he says instead, “For helping me out. You saved me a lot of time.”

Kurt chuckles, “I did it for purely selfish reasons,” he takes Blaine's hand again, like it's normal, like he does this all the time, “If you're in here practicing for your final, then I don't get to enjoy a nice hot cup of hot cocoa with my friend,” he squeezes Blaine's hand tight.

“ Still,” Blaine manages, wondering if Kurt can feel his heartbeat through his fingers, “Thanks.”

Kurt just grins and starts to pull Blaine out of the room, “Don't mention it.”

**

Blaine is staring up at the ceiling, trying to will himself to sleep when the noises start.

At first it's a low creaking sound, one he dismisses as the pipes. Somebody probably decided that midnight is the perfect time for a shower. He ignores it, instead thinking of how perfect his hands fit with Kurt's, how Kurt hadn't let it go the entire walk from the ballroom to Santana and Rachel's room.

Then there's a light bang on the wall. Blaine jumps up, eyes wide as he turns to stare at the wall behind his bed. It's only a couple of seconds later that he hears the bang again, this time accompanied by the low creaking sound. His heart starts pounding, eyes widening by the second. It's not- no. It can't be.

The bang again, and a voice, soft and female, whispering the word he dreads the most, “ _ Kurt _ .”

No. No, this is not happening. No, no, no, he is not listening to this. Hearing Tina brag about how amazing her sex with Kurt is, how big he is, how perfectly he fucks her, that's one thing. Actually  _ hearing _ it? No. He can't. He just can't.

He needs to leave. Needs to get out of this room. Needs to stop imagining the hands that mere hours ago directed his hips in soft swivels now gripping his girlfriend's hips as he pounds into her. How did it even get to this point so fast? Was their foreplay completely silent?

_ Stop _ he tells himself as another moan of “ _ Kurt, yes _ ,” floats through the walls like a ghost. Blaine's fingers tighten around his blankets. This is a four star resort; you'd think they'd have slightly thicker walls. “Gonna miss this.”

_ What _ Blaine wonders, though his thoughts are interrupted by  “ Shit,” That's Kurt, he knows that voice, though he's never heard it like this before. Low and gruff and wonderful, so wonderful, “Tight. Fuck, Tina.”

_ Tight _ . Blaine would be tight. He hasn't had sex since Sebastian, it's been months, he'd be so tight, so perfectly tight for Kurt.

Before he can stop himself he's bringing a hand down to push against the erection growing against his thigh. Pleasure rolls through him and he gasps at the same time Tina does.

It could be him. He could be behind that wall, getting fucked into oblivion by the love of his life. It could totally be him, Kurt's wide hands gripping his hips tighter than earlier as his cock plunges deep into his ass, praising him for being so tight

_ No _ . No, it couldn't, because tight ass or no tight ass Kurt is still straight and he's still dating Tina. Tina, whom he is fucking at this very instant while Blaine palms himself through his pants imagining it's him instead.

It's gone too far. Everything, all of this, it's gone way too far, and it needs to stop. It needs to stop now.

He doesn't give himself the time to think things over, just pushes his blankets aside, rearranges himself inside his pants, grabs the key card to his room, and walks down the hall with purpose.

Elliott answers with a yawn, shirtless and bleary-eyed, clearly having just been woken up. “Blaine?”

“ Hi,” Blaine breathes, heart pounding, cock still twitching in his pants, “Can I come in?”

Elliott nods and opens the door wider, allowing him entrance. “What's wrong? Did something happen?”

“ I've been thinking,” Blaine begins, “Like I promised.”

Elliott frowns, shutting the door behind them. “Okay,” he says cautiously.

“ And I like you,” Blaine continues, staring up at Elliott, hoping his eyes don't look as desperate as he feels, “I always have. You're cute, you're funny, you're nice, and I have the best time with you.”

“ But...” Elliott begins. Blaine shakes his head.

“ No buts this time,” he steps closer to Elliott, “I'm done with the 'buts'. Where have buts ever gotten anyone?” he wraps his arms around Elliott's neck, stretching on his tip-toes in order to do so, “I want you.”

Elliott's arms come around his waist and hold him tight. He's so much bigger than Blaine, practically pulling him off his feet in his embrace. “Don't tease me,” he whispers, so close. “Don't dangle this in front of me and then take it away. You know I don't want casual with you.”

“ I know,” Blaine replies, because he does. He doesn't want casual either. Casual doesn't stop him from jacking off to thoughts of Kurt fucking him into the mattress. “I don't want casual either.”

“ Fuck,” Elliott gasps, then seals his mouth over Blaine's. It's hot, it's sloppy and wet, and Elliott's tongue is right there, too soon, but Blaine lets him. He flicks his tongue lightly in return but overall lets Elliott take the lead, let's himself be kissed, be backed onto the bed, be undressed.

It doesn't feel real, being here with Elliott, kissing him, being naked around him. Like he's going to wake up from a strange dream any minute now and wonder what the hell happened.

“ Are you sure?” Elliott asks, and Blaine can feel his slick fingers tracing Blaine's hole.

Is he sure? He's sure he doesn't want to be in love with Kurt anymore. He's sure he's tired of watching Tina and Kurt fall further in love each day. He's sure he's tired of wasting the opportunity for a wonderful relationship that's been staring at him in the face for as long as he's been in California. He's sure he wants Elliott's hands to erase the feeling of Kurt's on his hips.

“ Yeah,” he replies, letting himself fall.

He's been holding on for too long anyhow.

 


	9. Chapter 9

Blaine wakes up with an arm wrapped around his waist and a foggy memory that doesn't seem quite real. He looks down at the arm holding him close to another body and hates himself for wishing it were someone else's.

_ No _ he tells himself resolutely  _ you're done with that. You're moving on. _

“ Morning,” Elliott rasps, kissing the back of Blaine's neck softly. He pulls Blaine in closer, his bare chest pressing against Blaine's bare back. It feels strange; Elliott is so much bigger than Blaine, it feels like he's encompassing him entirely, like Blaine could get lost in him. He's sure he'll get used to it.

“ Good morning,” he says quietly, voice hoarse from sleep. Elliott kisses the back of his neck again, then loosens his hold on him to stretch.

“ I'm going to take a shower,” Elliott announces, one hand dragging down Blaine's side, causing goosebumps to erupt all over his skin. “Do you want to join me?”

Blaine shakes his head without even thinking about it, “I think I'm going to take a shower back in my room, if that's okay with you. All my clothes are there anyway.”

Elliott nods, hand stopping on Blaine's hip, “Blaine.”

“ Yes?”

“ This wasn't a one night thing, right?” he sounds desperate in a way that Blaine doesn't know how to deal with, “You're going to let me take you out on dates and eventually call you my boyfriend. Right?”

Blaine sighs. “Yes,” he says, turning and smiling up at Elliott, “I'm going to let you take me on dates and call me your boyfriend. It wasn't a one night thing for me. I promise.”

“ Okay,” Elliott nods and leans forward to kiss Blaine on the lips, “Be careful out there. If Santana catches you leaving my room we'll never hear the end of it.”

Blaine chuckles and climbs out of the bed, a bit embarrassed by the fact that he's still totally naked. Of course, Elliott is too, and he doesn't seem to be experiencing the same desire for modesty Blaine is as he jumps out of bed and heads to the bathroom without looking a bit ashamed. Blaine blushes and starts getting dressed, having to pick up his clothes from all areas of Elliott's hotel room. He glances at the bathroom door, now closed, the shower running, and sighs.

He exits the room as quietly as possible, glancing around the hallway to make sure that none of their friends are around. Seeing no one, he closes the door behind him and sprints to his room, opening and closing the door as quickly as he can. He takes a deep breath once he's safely inside, then sheds his pajamas and hops into the shower.

It's only when he's gelling his hair down that he notices the giant purple hickey near his ear. He stares at it, wide eyed.  _ Oh no _ .

There's a knock on the door and Santana's voice shouts, “Get your ass up, Anderson, we need to check out in half an hour!”

“ Give me a second,” Blaine yells, hurrying out of the bathroom and throwing on the clothes he'd laid out the night before. He stuffs his pajamas into his suitcase and then puts on all his winter gear, making sure to wrap the scarf particularly tight.

“ Twenty minutes,” Santana drawls when he exits the room, suitcase dragging behind him, “Also, what the hell are you wearing.”

“ Doesn't fit in my suitcase,” Blaine grumbles, starting the walk down to the lobby. He passes Elliott's room and feels his cheeks heat up at the mere sight of it.

“ Okay, well, hurry the fuck up. Shuttle leaves in twenty.”

Blaine huffs in annoyance and continues to pull his too full suitcase down the hall, grumbling every time a wheel gets stuck on the carpet.

A door opens down the hall, and within seconds there's a hand on top of his and a voice whispering, “Here, let me take this,” in his ear. Blaine looks up and sees Elliott smiling at him as he takes Blaine's suitcase from him. Blaine nods, then looks away quickly, forcing himself not to raise a hand to the hickey on his neck.

Oh, god. He had sex with Elliott last night. He's seen Elliott naked and Elliott's seen him naked. He finally knows the answer to Tina's  _ how big is he _ question.

He glances back at Santana, sees the way both her eyebrows are raised high and groans.

He slept with Elliott and everyone is going to know.

**

Santana doesn't say anything until they're all tucked into their seats on the train and Blaine has decided that maybe, just maybe, they're safe.

“ So, you finally gave in, huh?” she says. Blaine looks up at her, eyes wide, and Elliott does the same from his spot next to Blaine. Rachel frowns at Santana.

“ What are you talking about?” she asks.

Tina's head pops up from behind Santana, “I think I'd like to know the same.”

Santana smirks, stands up, leans over Blaine and pulls his scarf off his neck, “I'm talking about  _ that _ .”

“ Holy shit,” that's Sam, though Blaine can't see him since Sam is sitting behind him, “Dude, that is a massive hickey.”

Tina whistles, “Nice job Elliott.”

Elliott gapes, “What makes you think it was me?” everyone stares at him, even Blaine, who raises an eyebrow in his direction. Elliott rolls his eyes, “Yeah, whatever, it was me.”

Tina squeals, “Oh my god, I'm so happy!”

“ Took you long enough,” Rachel says, even though she's smiling. Kurt pops up from behind her and smacks the back of her head lightly.

“ Like you can talk,” he scoffs, then looks to Blaine, eyes immediately falling to the hickey. “Wow,” he says, “That is. Yeah, wow, that is a hickey right there.”

“ A hickey that  _ Elliott _ left,” Tina says, looping her arm through Kurt's, “So are you guys boyfriend's now?”

Blaine crosses his arms over his chest as well as he can in his parka, “We haven't even been on a date yet.”

“ And yet you've already bumped nasties. Wanky.”

Blaine pouts, “You make it sound so dirty.”

Tina laughs, “Honey, it's sex. It's kind of supposed to be dirty.”

“ Whatever,” Blaine says, turning his head away from them, “I'm done talking about this.”

Elliott sneaks a hand into Blaine's and squeezes it tight, “You know they mean well, right?”

“ Look at that, they're holding hands,” Santana sneers, “How adorable.”

Blaine glares at Elliott, but doesn't let go of his hand. It's strangely grounding, “I hate you all. Why I even wanted to come on this trip is a mystery to me.”

“ So you could get down and dirty with our good friend Elliott,” Santana says, receiving a high five from Sam for it. Blaine huffs.

“ Alright guys,” Kurt says, “Blaine clearly doesn't want to talk about it. They got together after months of driving us all crazy, hurray, can I go back to my book now?”

Everyone grumbles, and Santana looks downright murderous for having her fun stopped, but eventually everyone sits back down in their seats. Tina is the last one to sit, gaze lingering on Blaine for a moment too long, eyebrows knitted together. She sits down after a few seconds, though she does so slowly, clearly thinking hard. Elliott squeezes Blaine's hand again, drawing his attention away from his friend. It still doesn't feel completely right, but it doesn't feel wrong and for now that's all Blaine can really ask for.

**

When they arrive in the train station Tina pulls Blaine aside, raises both eyebrows to the edge of her hairline and says, “Well?”

Blaine blushes and nods. Tina pinches his stomach and he yelps, “Yes, okay?” he says, batting her hand away, “He's big. Are you happy now?”

Tina squeals and hugs him tightly, “Yes,” she says, “Mostly for you guys. A little about knowing Elliott's big.”

Blaine pushes her away, “Weirdo,” he mutters, but still smiles when she slips her hand in his, links their fingers together, and drags him back to join the others.

**

It's a good thing Blaine agreed to go on that ski trip, because he's pretty sure if he hadn't exam period would have driven him crazy.

Two straight weeks of being buried in textbooks, only leaving his room to go to the bathroom and only leaving the house to take an exam. Elliott drives him to campus for his second exam since Elliott has an exam that day too, and they spend the ride telling each other everything they know about history of theater and the evolution of design. It's not exactly romantic, but it is the only time they see each other. It's the only time Blaine sees anyone during those two weeks, really.

By the time exams are finished Blaine never wants to look at another textbook again. He also never wants to do another spin in his life.

**

It's Friday and Rachel just finished her last exam, meaning they're all officially done. Blaine is cuddled under Elliott's arm on the couch in Kurt and Elliott's apartment, and Santana is trying to convince everyone to let her go out and get booze while Sam pays the delivery man for the pizza.

“ We  _ always  _ get drunk after exams,” Santana complains, “I've been looking forward to this for two weeks, dammit.”

“ Blaine's not legal,” Tina points out. Blaine shrinks into Elliott. He really doesn't want Santana's rage directed at him right now.

“ So fucking what? We've gotten drunk with him before.”

“ Tina,” Kurt says, putting his hand on her arm. “Just tell them.”

Sam sets the pizza's down on the coffee table and Tina heaves out a heavy sigh, “Fine,” she walks to the center of the room, “Okay, so, I wanted to wait a little bit longer to tell you guys this, but since it seems Santana is hellbent on getting shitfaced I might as well do it before we're all too drunk to remember.” She bites her lip then says, “I'm moving to France.”

Blaine sits up straight, “Wait,” he speaks up over the silence, “What?”

She shrugs, “Last summer I applied to this exchange program. I was supposed to go second semester of second year, but I got wait listed. They told me to get my grades up and... well, they're up. So I'm spending next semester and doing a summer semester in France.”

“ When do you leave?” Rachel asks quietly, arms wrapped around herself. Tina looks down at her feet.

“ I leave in a couple of days.”

“ What the hell,” Santana glares, “And you didn't think to tell us until now?!”

“ I didn't want to distract you guys from studying,” Tina slips her hand into Kurt's, “Kurt and I decided it would be best to wait to tell you guys.”

Kurt clears his throat, “We're also breaking up.”

Blaine feels his heart jump in his throat, “What?” Elliott asks, arm loosening its hold around Blaine's shoulders, “Are you serious?”

“ Yeah,” Tina nods, “We talked about it and decided that eight months is a long time. We love each other, but we don't want to hold each other back.”

Something about the way that Kurt lowers his eyes to the ground and the way Tina's cheeks flush red leads Blaine to believe there's more to it than that.

“ So that's it?” Santana asks, “Exams are done, surprise I'm leaving and when I get back things will be weird as fuck because Kurt and I have decided eight months is too much time to keep it in our pants?”

“ That's not fair Santana,” Rachel says quietly, taking Santana's hand and squeezing it, “They have their reasons.”

“ And things won't be weird,” Tina assures, “Just like things aren't weird between Kurt and Rachel.”

“ That's just one ex though,” Elliott says carefully, “You're telling me that Kurt's going to be fine with hanging out with two of his exes on a regular basis?”

“ Yeah, and Kurt and Rachel only dated for like, a second,” Sam adds, “You and Kurt have been together for over a year.”

“ And we have eight months to get over each other,” Tina says, eyes pleading, “Guys, this won't change anything.”

“ It'll change  _ everything _ ,” Rachel whispers.

Blaine purses his lips. He wishes he had something to add, but all he can think about is  _ Kurt's single _ . It runs through his mind over and over again, like a broken record.

_ No _ .  _ He's still straight. You're with Elliott now. Give it up _ .

“ I think now would be a good time to bring out the booze,” Elliott announces when the silence lasts a little too long. “Blaine, come help me?”

Blaine stands up and follows Elliott to the kitchen, taking a moment to glance back at Kurt, who catches his eye. That something he's seen before, it's there, briefly, and then it's gone. Blaine looks away and slips his hand into Elliott's as a reminder.

**

Santana's been drunk for at least half an hour and Blaine really needs to pee. He's had to pee for at least ten minutes, actually, but has been distracted by Elliott sloppily making out with his neck. It feels good in his slightly inebriated state, and he's pretty sure he'll have a hickey the next day, but in his defense Elliott is his boyfriend and he's totally allowed to have hickeys from his boyfriend.

"I just love everyone so much," Santana sobs from her place in between Rachel and Sam, hands covering her face as her shoulders heave, "I know I don't tell you guys, but I do, I love you. Even you Blaine."

Blaine gives her a lazy thumbs up.

"See? I shouldn't love you, you're such a nerd, but I do. I do love you guys, oh god." A fresh wave of sobs follow.

"It's okay San," Rachel whispers, pulling her girlfriend closer. "It's all going to be okay."

"No, it's  _ not  _ going to be okay, okay? It's not! Kurt and Tina ruined everything and when Tina gets back we're going to have to decide who we want to hang out with and I just can't handle that, I can't."

“ San, come on,” Sam pats her shoulder at the same time that Elliott sucks particularly hard on Blaine's neck.

“ Everything's going to change,” Santana cries out, arms akimbo. “They ruined everything, I hate them!”

Elliott laps at Blaine's neck. Blaine  _ really _ needs to use the washroom.

“ I have to pee,” he announces, burying his hand in Elliott's hair and using that as leverage to pull him up and press a sloppy kiss to his lips, “I'll be right back, okay?”

“ Don't go,” Elliott kisses him again. It feels  _ so _ nice, “Stay here and kiss me more.”

“ See?” Santana shouts, “They get it. They understand they have to stay together for all of us. Why can't Kurt and Tina be more like them?”

Blaine chuckles and pulls Elliott into one last kiss, “I'm seriously going to pee my pants,” he giggles against Elliott's lips, “I will be right back, okay?”

Elliott nods and pats Blaine's butt, which makes Sam wolf whistle and Santana cry even harder. Blaine winks at Elliott then stumbles his way down the hall to the bathroom. Apparently he's a bit more drunk than he thought he was.

It takes him way too long to get his business done, and he's feeling incredibly sleepy by the time he's done. He wonders if Elliott would be mad if he just went into his room and fell asleep. Yeah, that sounds like a really good idea right about now.

He stumbles out of the bathroom and towards Elliott's bedroom, stopping at Elliott's door when he hears Kurt and Tina's voices coming from Kurt's room.

“ This is not a normal conversation,” says Kurt's voice. It's so pretty. Blaine always forgets how pretty Kurt's voice is.

“ What? Why not?”

“ Tina, we literally just broke up. Like, half an hour ago.”

“ So?!”

“ So it's not normal for exes to be talking about getting together with other people half an hour after a breakup.”

Blaine presses himself up against the wall next to Kurt's door so he can listen better. He's pretty sure he'd never do this if he weren't drunk but... well, he's pretty drunk and he sort of just wants to keep listening to Kurt's voice.

“ Who says?” that's Tina's voice again and she sounds very exasperated, “You know we're not normal exes, Kurt. We always agreed we'd stay friends if we were to ever break up.”

“ Well, yeah, but-”

“ But nothing, come on. I know you've been crushing on-” muffled sounds. Blaine tip toes a bit closer to the door to hear better.

“ _ Tina _ .”

“ What? I know you have. I've seen you staring.”

“ I-”

“ I'm not mad, Kurt. It's okay. I'm trying to tell you to go for it.”

“ It's just weird,” Kurt's voice says, “We literally just broke up and you're telling me to go date someone else.”

“ Okay, well, maybe not right away. Give yourself some time to get over me. I know it'll be hard.”

“ Ha, ha.”

“ Are you saying it won't be?” Tina teases. Kurt doesn't respond, and Blaine inches closer to the door just in case he's missing what Kurt's saying. “Kurt?”

“ This just isn't what I expected,” he whispers, “When you applied to that program we agreed we'd make long distance work if it was necessary. But now...”

Tina sighs, “Things are different now.”

“ Is it bad that I don't want them to be?”

“ No,” Tina's voice exclaims, “Not at all.” They're both quiet, and Blaine's heart pounds so loud he's sure they can hear him, “You know, you can't help who you like.”

“ I like  _ you _ . I love you.”

“ I know, I know. But... not as much as you used to.”

“ I'm sorry.”

“ Kurt, it's fine. We both agreed this was for the best. For both of us.” More silence. Then, “You know I'm not mad, right? About you liking-”

“ Shut up,” Kurt hisses, “Tina, seriously, they're like, right over there.”

“ Oh, come on, they're all drunk off their asses, nobody's going to hear me saying you have a huge crush on-”

“ _ Tina.  _ I'm serious. Elliott would kill me if he knew.”

Blaine frowns at that. What does Elliott have to do with anything?

“ Fine,” Tina sighs, “I'll drop it.” She chuckles, “This is kind of a weird conversation, huh?”

“ Yeah,” Kurt laughs as well. “I'm really going to miss you.”

“ I'll miss you more,” Tina replies, and there's a smacking sound. Blaine listens closer and – yeah, they're kissing.

Blaine separates from the wall and tip toes his way back to Elliott's room. He flops on the bed instantly, blinking back tears. It doesn't matter. None of it matters. Kurt's single, but he's still straight, and there's some other girl he already likes. Some girl Elliott knows. A friend? A sister? God, who cares. It doesn't matter.

“ There you are,” Elliott is suddenly beside him, arms wrapping around his body and holding him close, “I've been wondering where you went.”

“ Just here,” Blaine whispers. “In your bed.”

“ I like you in my bed,” Elliott whispers, kissing the back of Blaine's neck.

“ Yeah,” Blaine says, cuddling closer and shutting his eyes, “Me too.

 


	10. Chapter 10

It doesn't really feel like Christmas in Cooper and Blaine's house until their parents arrive, hauling a truck load of presents , a giant Christmas tree in the trunk, and enough Christmas spirit to put the North Pole out of business. Blaine greets them both with giant hugs and squeals, more than a little excited to see them for the first time since he moved to Los Angeles.

“ I missed you guys so much,” he whispers against each of their necks as he holds them close.

“ Oh, we've missed you too Bumble Bee,” his mom coos, hugging him tighter, “We're so glad it worked out for us to come up here. It's been too long since we've seen you and your brother.”

“ Why you boys insisted on living so far away from us we still don't understand,” his dad jokes, pressing a kiss to his forehead, “Missed you, Bee.”

“ Alright, come on, get out of the hall,” Cooper calls, “Let's get this place Christmas-fied.”

Blaine laughs, holds his parents close for a couple seconds longer then pulls them down the hall and into the living room, already blushing as each parent links an arm through his and, at the same time, they say, “So, tell us about Elliott.”

**

Elliott arrives promptly at five pm on the twenty second of December, a bottle of wine under one arm and a grin on his face. “Hey,” he greets Blaine, leaning down to peck him on the lips. Blaine accepts the kiss and ushers him inside, taking his jacket after closing the door.

“ Thanks for coming over.”

“ No problem,” Elliott says, “I'm excited to meet your parents.”

Blaine ducks his head, “I know it's a little soon, but-”

“ Maybe,” Elliott shrugs, then wraps an arm around Blaine's shoulder, “But I'm still glad you thought to invite me over.”

Blaine chuckles. “Mom, dad!” he calls out, “Elliott's here.”

His parents' heads pop out of the kitchen doorway, smiling far too wide for Blaine's liking, “Elliott,” Blaine's father drawls, “We've heard so much about you.”

“ No they haven't,” Blaine says quickly, eyes widening.

“ All good things, I hope,” Elliott says, extending a hand, “Elliott Gilbert. Pleasure to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Anderson.”

“ Oh, so polite,” Blaine's mom shakes his hand, her other hand coming up to her chest, “Blaine, you didn't tell us he was such a gentleman.”

Blaine blushes, “I just-”

“ Hush,” his mom tuts, “Come, Elliott, we're making peppermint hot chocolate. Would you like some?”

“ Most definitely Mrs. Anderson.”

Blaine's mom squeezes his arm and turns to grin at her son, “I love him already, darling.”

Blaine smiles, “Good.”

**

_ Hey, is Elliott still at your house? - K _

Blaine glances away from his phone up to where Elliott is attempting to decipher whatever Cooper's acting out. Blaine chuckles at the absolute bewildered look on his boyfriend's face. He probably should have warned him about being on Cooper's team for charades.

_ Yeah, why? - B _

The evening has gone far better than Blaine thought it would. Elliott's charmed his way right into both his parents hearts, and Cooper hasn't said anything about the amount of times Blaine's slept over at Elliott's (although he did mention Elliott sleeping over the first night of frosh week. Blaine's already decided to keep his Christmas present from him for as long as he can manage in exchange for that one). Elliott fits in with his family like a long lost son. Blaine still isn't sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

_ Bonfire tonight. Got San's car, so I can give you guys a ride – K. _

Blaine chews on his bottom lip then calls out, “Elliott.” His boyfriend stops guessing whatever Cooper is doing and looks over at him, “Kurt just texted me about a bonfire tonight. He said he got Santana's car, so he can give us a ride.”

“ Where is it?” Elliott replies, “I can just drive us.”

Blaine shrugs and texts back  _ Where is it? Elliott said he can drive – B. _

Kurt texts back within seconds.  _ Hard to explain. I'll just get you guys. Be there in fifteen – K. _

Blaine stares at the phone in confusion, then shakes his head, “He said he's coming because it's too complicated to explain, or something.”

“ Who's coming?” Blaine's dad asks.

“ Elliott's roommate, Kurt. There's a bonfire or something tonight.” He catches the glance that his parents exchange, “I don't have to go if you don't want. I know you guys are only here for a few more days.”

Blaine's mom smiles softly, “No, go. Have fun with your friends. Just be home before midnight, alright?”

Cooper laughs, “Ah, ye olde reinstated curfew.”

“ It's fine,” Blaine assures, “I don't mind being home by midnight.”

“ Will you be staying over tonight Elliott?” Blaine's dad asks, and Elliott, who has been sipping his hot chocolate with a smile that says he's enjoying this far too much, chokes on his hot chocolate.

“ Um, what?”

“ _ Dad _ ,” Blaine hisses.

“ What?” his dad asks innocently, “Sebastian slept over every time he came for dinner.”

“ Yeah, but-” Blaine feels himself blushing bright red.

“ But what, Bumble Bee?” his mom asks, her face just as innocent as his dad's, “Are you telling us that you and Elliott haven't-”

“ _ Mom _ ,” Blaine shouts.

Elliott, whose face, Blaine is proud to report, is just as red as Blaine's, clears his throat and says, “I would love to stay over Mrs. Anderson, but unfortunately I have an early flight to New Jersey tomorrow morning and I haven't finished packing quite yet.”

Blaine buries his face in his hands as his mom replies, “That's perfectly understandable darling. You're originally from New Jersey then?”

His parents are the  _ worst _ .

**

The doorbell rings half an hour later as Blaine's mom is finishing tucking Blaine's scarf into the collar of his jacket. Blaine, Cooper, and Elliott have all assured her that it won't be that cold out, but she insisted. “It'll make me feel better.”

“ Come in,” Blaine calls, glaring at his mom, who pats his scarf down, smiling brightly at him. The door opens and Kurt's there, wearing a pair of incredibly tight jeans and a light jacket that accents his shoulders a little bit too well. Blaine looks away when Kurt catches his eye and smiles at him, a blush creeping up his neck.

“ Hey,” Kurt greets, “You guys ready to go?”

“ Yeah, if my mom decides I'm bundled up enough,” Blaine scowls at his mom, who raises an eyebrow at him.

“ You're good,” she says, glancing over at his dad, then pats his chest, “Are you going to introduce us?”

“ Oh, right,” Blaine gestures at Kurt, “This is Kurt, he's Elliott's roommate.”

Kurt scoffs, “And Blaine's very best friend,” he slings an arm over Blaine's shoulder, “Right Blainey-bear?”

“ Hey,” Elliott glares at them playfully, “Keep your paws to yourself, Hummel. Only I can call him Blainey-bear.”

Blaine chuckles and gently extracts himself from Kurt's hold, “Nobody can call me Blainey-bear, thanks.” He looks back to his parents, who are sharing what looks like a concerned look, “Are you sure you don't mind me going? I can stay and hang out with you guys.”

Blaine's dad shakes his head, “No, go, have fun. Spend some time with your boyfriend,” he raises both eyebrows at that, “It's his last night in town, after all.”

“ Okay,” Blaine nods, “Well, I'll see you guys tomorrow, probably?”

“ Maybe,” Blaine's mom says, “You know how I get when I drink more than one cup of hot chocolate, wired all night,” she chuckles, then leans forward to press a kiss to Blaine's cheek, “Have a good time Bumble Bee.”

“ We'll make sure he does,” Kurt assures, putting his arm around Blaine again. Blaine really wishes he'd stop doing that. “It was a pleasure to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Anderson.”

“ You as well Kurt,” Blaine's dad answers, lips pursed tight. Blaine frowns. Do his parents... not like Kurt?

“ Alright, Hummel, what did I say,” Elliott forcefully removes Kurt's arm from Blaine's shoulders and replaces it with his own, “We'll make sure to have Blaine back by midnight,” he says, turning to Blaine's parents with a smile. They nod and smile back at him. Blaine's frown deepens.

“ Have a good time, darling,” Blaine's mom says, blowing him a kiss. Blaine nods, still frowning, and lets Elliott lead him out of the door.

As soon as the door closes Kurt stretches his arms over his head and says, “Your folks are super nice, Bumble Bee.”

Blaine groans, “Yeah, yeah,” he mumbles, “Are we going to a bonfire or what?”

**

The bonfire is at the exact place all the previous bonfire's Blaine's attended have been, something Elliott doesn't seem to notice, too busy going over the thing he needs to pack with Kurt. Kurt keeps glancing up at the rear-view mirror and smirking at Blaine. Every time he does Blaine's heart jumps and he looks away. He shouldn't still have these feelings. He's been dating Elliott for almost a month. They should be gone by now.

He barely talks to anyone during the bonfire, just sits tucked into Elliott's side sipping a bottle of Coke all night, listening to Elliott and Kurt talk about last Christmas, watching Sam across the bonfire text someone non-stop, barely looking up from his phone, wondering where Rachel and Santana are tonight. He manages to keep his eyes away from Kurt for almost the entirety of the evening, only slipping up every now and then when Kurt laughs at something particularly hard, or when he hears his own name from Kurt's lips.

At 11:30pm, Blaine pokes Elliott's stomach and says, “I have to head home soon.”

Elliott looks away from whoever he is talking to, “Already? Party's just getting started.”

Blaine shrugs, “Promised my mom I'd be home by midnight.”

“ Right, yeah.” Elliott nods, “Um,” he glances around, “I may be a little bit drunk?”

Blaine drops his head back on Elliott's shoulder, “Really?”

“ Sorry, babe,” Elliott shrugs, jostling Blaine, “Maybe Kurt can give you a ride?”

_ Nope. Bad idea. Worst idea. _

“ Who said my name?” Kurt calls out from where he's sitting next to Sam on the other side of the fire.

“ Elliott said your name,” Elliott shouts back, “Please take Blaine home so his mom doesn't hate me.”

“ Of course,” Kurt scrambles to his feet, “Good thing I only had one beer at the beginning of the night, huh?” he chuckles and, suddenly in front of Blaine, holds two hands out to help him up. Blaine flushes and takes Kurt's hands, letting himself be pulled up.

“ Hey, hey, before you go,” Elliott takes the hands that Kurt just held and pulls Blaine into a deep, warm kiss, tongue pushing its way into Blaine's mouth and painting the inside of Blaine's mouth with the taste of rum and Coke. “I'll miss you,” he says quietly, “Merry Christmas.”

“ Merry Christmas,” Blaine replies, kissing him again, pulling Elliott's face close. Elliott moans into it.

“ Alright, come on,” Kurt flicks Blaine's shoulder, “Let's get this show on the road.”

Blaine nods, “Have a good time with your parents,” he tells Elliott, “text me when you land so I know you made it safe.”

Elliott rolls his eyes and shoos him away, “Yeah, yeah. See you soon, babe.”

Kurt scoffs, grabs Blaine's hand and starts pulling him towards the car. “You two are sickening.”

Blaine chuckles, “Like you and Tina were any better,” he replies, eyes widening as soon as he says it. “Shit. I mean-”

“ Hey, it's fine,” Kurt says, shaking his head and smiling, “I'm not going to, like, burst into tears at the mention of her.”

Blaine remembers the conversation between Kurt and Tina he overheard, about the new girl Kurt has a crush on, “Right. Of course.”

They get into Santana's car and start on their way. Blaine stares out the window. Last year around this time he'd been driving himself home from Sebastian's and there'd been snow as far as the eye could see. He wonders what past him would say if present Blaine told him where he'd be next Christmas – dating a hot older guy, trying to get over a hopeless crush on a straight hot older guy, in a car with said hot older straight guy, not even a hint of snow. He'd probably laugh and remind himself that he's deeply and passionately in love with Sebastian.

“ Hey,” Kurt's voice snaps him out of his thoughts, “You okay? You're thinking pretty loud over there.”

Blaine nods, “Fine.” He worries his bottom lip between his teeth, “Kurt?”

“ Yeah?”

“ Why did you insist on picking me and Elliott up?” he asks, glancing at Kurt briefly and then looking away, “I mean, you said the location of the bonfire was too complicated to explain, but it was at the same place Sam always has bonfire's.”

Kurt smiled and looked over at Blaine, “You got me,” he says, voice low and teasing, “I wanted to go to your house tonight.”

“ But why?” Blaine stresses, “Elliott and I could have easily picked you up.”

Kurt shrugs, “Yeah, I guess,” he turns back to the road, “But then I wouldn't have been able to meet your parents.”

Blaine stares, unsure if he's heard correctly, “My-”

Spots of red are spreading over Kurt's cheeks and he clears his throat, “Maybe a part of me knew I'd get to witness the wonder that is your childhood nickname, Bumble Bee.”

Blaine smiles at the blush on Kurt's cheeks. He's not sure if he's ever seen Kurt blush before. It's... kind of adorable. “Right,” he rolls his eyes and flicks Kurt on the shoulder, “Whatever you say, weirdo.”

“ Did you say something?” Kurt replies, “I can't get rid of this buzzing in my ear. I think a bumble bee got into my car.”

“ Got it, jerk,” Blaine laughs, “Last time you're ever allowed near my house or my parents.”

Kurt snaps his fingers, eyes sparkling as they stare at the road ahead, “But I was getting along so well with them.”

Blaine purses his lips at the memory of his parents concerned looks in regards to Kurt. “Yeah,” he whispers, “You three would have a blast and a half.”

**

He's quiet as he walks into the house, but his efforts are wasted as he instantly notes the lights still on in the living room. His mom is sitting on the couch, leafing through one of the novel's Cooper likes to keep lying around. “Hey,” he greets quietly, “Dad and Coop in bed?”

His mom nods, “I wanted to talk to you about Elliott. And Kurt.”

Blaine sits down next to her, unraveling his scarf from around his neck, “Okay?”

She takes a deep breath, then says, “Are you cheating on Elliott?”

“ What?!” Blaine shouts, then claps his hands over his mouth, “I mean. What?”

Blaine's mom sighs, “That Kurt boy. You two seem... close.”

Blaine blushes, “Kurt's straight mom.”

She looks him over, eyes narrowed, “That doesn't always stop boys.”

“ I'm not cheating on Elliott with Kurt. I promise.”

She purses her lips, thinking. “You know,” she starts slowly, “Cheating isn't always physical. Emotional cheating is just as real, and just as devastating.”

“ Mom, Kurt and I aren't-”

“ I'm not talking about Kurt anymore, Bumble Bee.”

Blaine blushes, the memory of Kurt teasing him with the nickname the entire ride home filling him with warmth, “What are you trying to say?”

She shrugs, “I know you,” she says quietly, “I remember how you were when you liked that boy from the GAP,” Blaine scoffs at the memory, “and I remember how you acted when you first started dating Sebastian.” She sighs, “I know what you're like when you're in love, Blaine.”

“ So?”

“ So you didn't act like that around Elliott.”

“ Mom, Elliott and I have only been dating for like, a month. I'm not in love with him yet.”

“ Of course not, seeing as you're clearly in love with Kurt.”

His jaw drops, “Wha- No! I'm not in love with- Why would you even think-”

“ Shyness,” she ticks a finger off, “Loss of words. Tons of blushing,” she strokes a bright red cheek briefly, “Honey, I know you.”

Blaine looks down at his knees. “I'm not...” he sighs, “I'm trying not to be.”

His mom nods, “That's what I thought. Look, I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life. However, I do think that Elliott boy is a little too nice to be strung along like this. He deserves someone who can really love him the way he deserves.”

“ I know,” Blaine whispers, “I'm getting there, though. I swear.”

“ No, you aren't,” she replies, shaking her head. “I understand what you're trying to do, and it's not going to work. Especially with Kurt being Elliott's roommate.”

“ It might-”

“ It won't,” she insists, “But, like I said, I'm not going to tell you how to live your life.” She tips his chin up with a finger so he's looking at her, “Elliott really is a nice boy. Much better than Sebastian.” She scowls a little at the mention of her son's ex. Blaine chuckles. She leans forward and presses a gentle kiss to his forehead, then starts to leave, pausing only when she reaches the doorway. “Kurt seems nice too,” she says quietly. Blaine's heart thumps wildly in his chest as he watches her go, mulling her words over in his head.

_ She's wrong _ he tells himself, pulling himself off the couch and dragging himself to bed,  _ I will get over Kurt. It may take a little longer than I expected, but I  _ _** will ** _ _ get over him _ .

He lies in bed and stares at the ceiling, reassuring himself at the same time that the phantom feeling of Kurt's arm around his shoulder sends sparks through him, the memory of Kurt's smile, his sparkling eyes, his blush at admitting he wanted to meet Blaine's parents shoot up his spine.

He  _ will  _ get over Kurt. He will.

 


	11. Chapter 11

It's strange, spending time with everyone without Tina there. He keeps looking over his shoulder trying to find her, heart clenching in anticipation for the moment she will appear and drape herself all over Kurt, steal a quick kiss, and call Blaine a weirdo when he blushes and looks away.

He can't imagine what it must be like for everyone else. They've known Tina for almost three years. Blaine's only known her for a few months.

It's not even that Tina's cut off all contact from everyone. She texts them almost non-stop, to the point where Blaine once had to ask her to please stop texting as it was three in the morning his time and he really needed to get some sleep.

She keeps asking how things are with Elliott. There are really only so many times that Blaine can say 'fine'.

They are fine, he and Elliott. They texted quite a bit when Elliott was in New Jersey, and got together to exchange Christmas presents the day he got back. Since school's started up again it's been a bit harder to get together since they're both so busy, but they still text and call almost every day.

Of course, he also texts Kurt and Tina almost every day, but that doesn't mean anything.

So, yeah. He and Elliott are fine.

**

“You need to get over here right now,” are the words that greet Blaine when he answers the phone. He frowns.

“Kurt?”

“I am so bored I might actually pass out. I need human interaction. ASAP.”

“I literally just got out of class,” Blaine says, walking over to the side of the sidewalk so as to get out of people's way.

“Good, that means you're close. Hey, bring some takeout a pizza, will you? I'll call the place, the one like two buildings away from ours? Thanks, I owe you huge.”

“Kurt-”

“See you soon!”

Blaine stares at his phone, wondering what just happened, then shakes his head and starts heading in the direction of Kurt and Elliott's apartment. It's not like he had anything to do anyway.

**

Kurt greets him by snatching the pizza out of his hands and shouting, “Thank the lord, I thought you'd died, what took so long?!”

Blaine chuckles and drops his messenger bag by the door, then toes out of his shoes, “It took me the normal amount of time to get here. The pizza wasn't ready when I got there, so-”

“There's cash on the table to pay you back,” Kurt says through a mouthful of pizza, “I really hope you weren't expecting a slice of this because I haven't eaten all day and I'm basically starving, so if you want pizza you're going to have to order another one.”

Blaine rolls his eyes and sits down across from Kurt, “You're such a _guy_.”

Kurt raises an eyebrow, “Um, duh? So are you, weirdo.”

“No, I mean. Such a stereotypical guy. With the surfing and the eating an entire pizza, and the hot girlfriend.”

Kurt snorts, “Hot ex-girlfriends. Plural. Nah, I think I'm done with hot girls for a while.”

Blaine's heart jumps in his chest, “Going to try dating ugly girls for a while?” he jokes. Kurt kicks him in the leg.

“Don't be an asshole,” he says, “You know, I was reconsidering sharing my pizza with you, but now you've shown your true colors and I don't think it's going to happen.”

“Darn,” Blaine snaps his fingers, “It has olives on it, too. Those are my favorite.”

“Liar,” Kurt replies, “You only eat Hawaiian.”

“Huh?”

Kurt looks up at him, “What?”

“How did you know that? That I only like Hawaiian?”

Kurt shrugs, “Just an observation I've made.”

“Been watching me, Hummel?”

Kurt chuckles, “Always,” he replies, but it doesn't sound like teasing. Blaine stares at Kurt and Kurt stares back, that gleam in his eye back. It looks like attraction, it really looks like attraction, and Blaine doesn't want to get his hopes up, but Kurt keeps staring at him. He wants to say something, do something, maybe lean across the table and-

The door jiggles open and Elliott appears, a tray with two coffees in one hand and a little baggy in his mouth. Blaine jumps up, face instantly flushing. Jesus Christ.

“Blaine?” Elliott asks, dropping the little bag into his other hand, “What are you doing here?”

“Kurt, um. He said he was bored, and I was on campus anyway, so I thought why not?” he walks over to Elliott and stands on his tip toes to give him a kiss, “How are you?”

“Great, wonderful. I wish I'd known you were here, I would have gotten you a coffee.”

“Oh, don't worry about it.” Blaine says, smiling at the thought.

“Give him mine,” Kurt says, “Medium drip, right?” he asks Blaine. Blaine nods, “See, we have the same order. Just give him mine, it's fine. I have my pizza.”

Elliott narrows his eyes at his roommate, then shrugs and says, “Works for me. Hey, since Kurt already got a pizza, do you want to order one together? We can watch a movie?”

Blaine smiles and nods, even though that sounds like a terrible idea given he almost kissed Kurt not five minutes ago, “Yeah, works for me.”

“Awesome. What kind of pizza do you like again?” Elliott asks, already pulling out his cell phone.

Blaine starts to speak but is interrupted by Kurt saying, “Hawaiian,” then inhaling a slice of his own pizza. When he looks up to see Blaine and Elliott staring at him he shrugs and says, “What? So I pay attention to what kind of pizza people like. Fucking sue me.”

Elliott shrugs, and Blaine looks away. Nothing about this day is helping him get over Kurt, that's for sure.

**

At around seven Kurt receives a mysterious text and excuses himself to the kitchen. Elliott takes the opportunity to pull Blaine into his lap and suck his tongue into his mouth. Blaine responds in kind, happy for the distraction. He's even more happy when Elliott yells out, “Kurt, Blaine and I are going to fuck now, so if you don't want to hear it you should probably leave,” before pulling Blaine along to his room.

Kurt doesn't reply, and Blaine doesn't hear the door to the apartment opening or closing, but that might have more to do with Elliott's mouth wrapped tight around his dick and Elliott's fingers fingering him open.

**

“Have you heard from Tina?” Blaine asks Kurt a couple of weeks later, sitting across from him at a local diner. They're waiting for their cheeseburgers and Kurt's foot keeps bumping against Blaine's under the table. Blaine is pretending he doesn't notice.

“Yeah,” Kurt chuckles, “She keeps bugging me about this thing we talked about,” he stares at Blaine, smiling, “I told her I'm working on it.”

 _The other girl_ , Blaine remembers, “Right,” he nods, “Well, it's good you guys are talking. That there's no hard feelings.”

Kurt rolls his eyes, “Yeah, thank god for that, because Santana's already rubbing it in my face that Tina's already moved on.”

Blaine blushes. He'd received Tina's _GUESS WHO JUST GOT LAID BY A HOT FRENCH GUY_ text as well. Of course, he'd had the decency to not mention it to Tina's ex. Granted, seeing as Santana was dating Kurt's ex it doesn't surprise him that she didn't grant him that reprieve.

“What about you?” Blaine asks, going for casual.

“What about me.”

“Have you, you know, moved on?” he's pretty sure Kurt would have told him if he were dating some other girl by now, but Kurt hasn't even mentioned a new girl around him, so who knows.

Kurt shrugs, “I guess,” he licks his lips, “It doesn't really matter.”

“Why?” Blaine asks, grinning when he notices their food coming their way.

“They're with someone.”

“Huh? Sorry, our food's here,” Blaine says, sitting up straight in anticipation. Kurt chuckles, thanking the waitress as she leaves. Blaine takes a giant bite of his burger the instant she's gone, then a giant slurp of his milkshake, then, “What were you saying?”

“Hungry?” Kurt teases.

“Starved,” Blaine groans, “I feel like I haven't had a good burger in ages.”

Kurt smirks, kicks Blaine gently under the table and simpers, “You're such a _guy_.”

Blaine kicks back, “Shut up,” he shakes his head, then takes another bite of his burger. It really is delicious.

“I should warn Elliott that you're cheating on him with that burger.”

Blaine gasps, “Don't you dare!” he holds the burger tighter, “I'll just make sure the three of us are never in the same place.”

Kurt chuckles and finally starts digging into his own burger. Blaine watches him, happiness settling in his belly. He feels like there's something he's forgetting, something he missed, but he ignores it when Kurt looks up and smiles at him with ketchup decorating the corner of his lip.

He thinks, maybe, he can be content with this, just friendship between him and Kurt. He can't say he was expecting things to progress like this when Tina left, as he always felt he was more Tina's friend and that Kurt merely put up with him because Tina liked him. That said, he's beyond thankful things didn't stop when Tina left. Because this, right here, teasing each other, enjoying burgers, having a good time; he doesn't ever want this to end

**

Blaine is sitting on the staircase, waiting for Kurt to pick him for their movie date ( _friend date_ Blaine tells himself over and over) when his phone rings. He sees Elliott's face on his screen with the name _Boyfriend_ underneath and swipes to answer.

“Hey, you,” he says, pulling his knees up to his chest, “What's up?”

“I was about to ask you the same thing,” Elliott says, “What are you doing right now? Kurt asked to borrow my car to go out, so I have the house to myself.”

Blaine chews on his bottom lip, “Actually, I'm waiting for Kurt to come get me. We're going to see a movie.” Silence greets his answer, and he momentarily wonders if the call has dropped. He can still hear Elliott breathing heavily on the other end of the line, though. “Hello? Elliott?”

“Yeah, sorry,” Elliott says, “It just seems like every time I call you to meet up you're already hanging out with Kurt.”

Blaine blushes, “That's not true. We had that study date at your house on Monday.”

“Yeah, with Kurt and Sam,” Elliott sighs, “I want to spend time just the two of us. Go out for dinner, maybe catch a movie. Have a sleepover...”

“I'm really sorry. I want that too, I do. But I promised Kurt-”

“It's okay, don't worry. It's been a long day, I'm sorry if I sound mad.”

“You don't,” Blaine whispers, “I could pack an overnight bag and bring it with me, if you want? I'll come back to yours with Kurt, we can have that sleepover.”

Elliott chuckles, “Yeah, that sounds good. We'll talk about making some room for me in that crazy schedule of yours later, alright?”

“Yeah,” Blaine replies, noticing a car parking in front of his house, “Sorry, but Kurt just got here. We'll talk later, okay?”

“Okay,” Elliott replies, “See you later, babe.”

Blaine smiles, “Bye,” he says quietly, then hangs up. He rushes to the front door and tells Kurt to give him a couple of minutes. Kurt shrugs from where he's sitting in Elliott's car and with that Blaine runs upstairs to pack a quick overnight bag, shouting at Cooper that he won't be home until the next afternoon, then rushing out of the house and into Kurt's car.

“Whoa there,” Kurt laughs, “We're just seeing a movie, not running away together.”

Blaine ducks his head and chuckles, “Yeah, I know. This is for after. Elliott asked me to stay over tonight.”

Kurt starts up the car, “Oh,” he says, laughter gone from his voice, “I guess I'll ask San if I can stay over with her and Rach.”

“You don't have to,” Blaine assures, “We won't – I'll tell Elliott we can't.”

Kurt snorts, “Seriously, Blaine? You're going to _not_ have sex with your boyfriend because you don't want to inconvenience me?” He shakes his head, “That's really sweet, but also really fucking stupid. I've kicked Elliott out a thousand times before, I don't mind him doing it to me.”

“Okay, I guess.” He groans, “Now I don't want to do stuff with Elliott though. Since I know you'll know. It'll be weird.”

Kurt rolls his eyes, “ _You're_ weird,” he says, shaking his head, then readily changes the subject. Blaine accepts the change in conversation topic and, for the time being, puts sleeping over with Elliott out of his mind.

**

It is weird. That night, as he bobs between Elliott's legs, he can't stop thinking about how Kurt _knows_. He knows Blaine is having sex right now, knows Blaine is having sex with Elliott, specifically. He wonders what Kurt must think. Is he grossed out? He is straight, after all. Isn't gay sex supposed to gross straight guys out?

“Hey,” Elliott murmurs, fingers combing through Blaine's curls, “You okay down there?”

Blaine pops off his cock, forcing a smile, “I’m perfect,” he assures before getting right back to it.

Maybe Kurt isn't thinking about them. He probably isn't. He's probably just lying on the couch in Santana and Rachel’s living room, thinking about school. Maybe doing some homework.

But if Kurt _is_ thinking about them. What is he thinking about? Is he thinking about what is actually happening? About Blaine blowing Elliott? Or, does he think it's happening the other way around? Maybe he doesn't think they're blowing each other at all; maybe he thinks they're fucking. Maybe he's thinking about Blaine on his hands and knees on the bed, Elliott fucking in and out of him roughly, maybe he's turned on by the thought, maybe he's touching himself-

“Shit,” Blaine hears Elliott gasp, “Shit, Blaine, yes. You're so good, baby. So good.”

Blaine increases the bobs of his head and brings a hand down to stroke himself. What if Kurt _is_ touching himself? Is he doing it in the bathroom at Santana's apartment, or is he so hard that he just pulled his cock out and started jacking off in the middle of her living room? Is he merely thinking about Blaine and Elliott fucking, or is he imagining himself in Elliott's place? Hovering over Blaine, cock thick and erect resting against Blaine's lips, Blaine on his stomach on the bed, ass raised as Kurt fingers him, gets him ready for him...

He comes, far too soon, stroking himself in time with the increased pace of the bobbing of his head. Elliott notices and clenches his fingers in Blaine's hair, “Fuck, baby,” he groans, holding Blaine in place as his hips stutter and come shoots down Blaine's throat. Blaine takes it, swallows all of it, the aftershocks of his orgasm already fading and the guilt creeping in.

Oh god. Oh _god_.

He just thought about Kurt while having sex with Elliott.

 _Oh god_.

“Hey,” Elliott cradles Blaine's jaw gently, slowly pulls him off his cock, “Come here.”

Blaine scrambles further up the bed, letting himself be kissed when Elliott kisses him. _Ohgodohgodohgod_.

“You're so good at that,” Elliott tells him, “I don't know what I did to deserve you.”

Blaine doesn't look at him, instead brings Elliott's arm around himself and shuffles until both of them are under the covers. It doesn't take long for Elliott to fall asleep, arm going slack around Blaine's middle and warm, even, breaths hitting the nape of his neck. Blaine can't sleep though; isn't sure if he'll be able to sleep at all all night.

All he can think, over and over again, as he stares into the darkness of Elliott's room, is _oh god_.

**

It's a bit strange, seeing Kurt in the morning. He looks so casual, already dressed and ready for the day, asking Blaine if he wants to accompany him on his walk to campus. Blaine can't think of a reason beyond _I thought of you while I was blowing my boyfriend_ to say no, so he agrees, picks up his bag and says goodbye to Elliott with a lingering kiss.

He feels awkward as they walk, unsure of what to say. The only thoughts occupying his mind are guilty ones, and for the first couple of blocks of their walk he can't hear a word Kurt says.

It isn't until Kurt waves a hand in front of his face that he finally snaps out of it, “Huh?” he asks.

“I was just asking where you're at,” Kurt raises an eyebrow at him, “It's like your head is in the clouds.” He smirks, “Is Elliott really that good in bed?”

Great. So Kurt _had_ been thinking about Blaine and Elliott.

“No. I mean, yes, I mean- never mind. Sorry. I'm sort of out of it.”

Kurt throws his head back and laughs that glorious laugh of his, “No shit, Sherlock,” he bumps their shoulders together, and its like lightning. “Don't worry, I won't tell Elliott you said he wasn't good in bed.”

Blaine's eyes widened, “I _didn't_ -”

Kurt winks at him and interrupts with, “So have you been to that sushi place down by the beach yet? Because if you haven't we have to go sometime this week. I've been craving sushi for _so_ long.”

Blaine goes with it, as always thankful for Kurt's natural ability to diffuse an awkward situation with nothing but a couple of words. He agrees to sushi sometime over the week, then veers into the subject of school work. The more they talk the less guilt Blaine feels over what happened the previous night, but it's still there, gnawing at his subconscious. It's there for the rest of the day, and is only made worse that night when Elliott texts him to say goodnight like the wonderful, perfect, doesn't think of other guys while blowing him, boyfriend that he is.

Blaine snorts to himself as he curls into his blanket. He can't believe Elliott thinks he doesn't deserve Blaine.

**

“I want to take you out.”

Blaine looks up from the play he's attempting to analyze, frowning at his boyfriend, “We are out,” he gestures to the cafe around them. Elliott shakes his head.

“I mean, like, actually out. To a fancy restaurant.”

“Oh,” Blaine closes his book, “Um. What kind of fancy are we talking about?”

“So fancy. Like, more fancy than you can even imagine. Ridiculously fancy. You'd have to buy a new suit, that's how fancy.”

Blaine smiles, “That's pretty fancy,” he laces their fingers together over the table, “And when will this fancy night be taking place? I have a very busy schedule, as you know.”

Elliott lifts his hand and presses a kiss to it, “I do know,” he says, “How about Saturday.”

Instantly, Blaine freezes, “Um. Saturday?”

Elliott drops his hand, “Don't tell me.”

“I'm sorry-”

“Really?”

“Well, I didn't know you'd want to take me out. Look, it's fine, I'll cancel. It's fine, okay?”

“Don't- Shit,” Elliott rubs his hands over his face, “I'm sorry. You don't have to cancel your plans with Kurt.”

“No, I do. My boyfriend's taking me out on a fancy dinner date. Kurt and I can hang out any time.”

“You don't have to-”

Blaine holds up a hand and pulls his phone out with the other, “Too late, I'm already texting him.”

Elliott chuckles, “Babe, come on.”

“I told you, it's fine. Now, are you going to help me shop for suits for this super fancy dinner, or what?”

Elliott smiles at him, eyes full of something Blaine is too scared to think about. He looks down at his books on the table, unable to bear the feeling of guilt and fear welling up inside him, and Elliott chuckles. “I may have overestimated the fanciness.”

“Oh, did you?”

“Just a little,” Elliott laughs again, then reaches across the table and takes Blaine's chin in his hand, “Hey, you okay?”

 _No_. “Why wouldn't I be?” he answers, forcing a smile. Elliott raises an eyebrow, looking suspicious, “Come on. Tell me more about this fancy dinner. You had me all excited, and now apparently I don't get a new suit? Weak.”

Elliott grins and starts to talk about some fake romantic evening that neither will be able to afford for years, all the while Blaine tries to curb the panic rising up inside him at that one singular thought that's buzzing around in his mind.

 _Don't let him be in love with me_.

**

“You've been quiet tonight,” Cooper mentions at dinner, “Busy day at school?”

Blaine shakes his head, “I need to break up with Elliott,” he replies, the words dull in his mouth.

Cooper snorts, “Yeah, I could have told you that a month ago.” Blaine looks up sharply, but Cooper just shrugs, “What? It's obvious you're still in love with Kurt. Anyone with eyes can see that.”

“Except Elliott and Kurt,” Blaine whispers. He shakes his head, “This was supposed to work. Being with Elliott was supposed to make me fall out of love with Kurt and fall in love with Elliott. Why isn't it working?”

Cooper shrugs, “You can't just turn feelings off, Squirt,” he reaches across the table to ruffle Blaine's hair, “Plus, what exactly were you expecting? You spend basically every day with Kurt. Even if you two weren't suddenly besties, he's Elliott's roommate. There's no room for separation.”

“Yeah,” Blaine groans, “God, I hate this. Why couldn't things just be as easy as they were in high school?”

“Right, easy. Blaine, I remember how you were in high school, and you were a mess.”

“Until Sebastian,” Blaine reminds him. Cooper rolls his eyes.

“Yeah, until Sebastian Asshat Smythe strolled in, stole your virginity, and pretended to love you for two years. So much better.”

Blaine could feel tears welling up in his eyes and he tried to blink them away, “Better than being in love with my boyfriend's straight roommate.”

“No, Blaine,” Cooper reached over to squeeze his hand, “It's really not.”

**

That night, he opens Sebastian's contact for the first time since they broke up. He stares at his name and number, the one he used to text every night, and thumbs open a new message.

_Did you ever love me?_

He stares at it, chewing on his bottom lip, then hits send before he can stop himself,

He waits. And waits. Waits and waits and waits, and eventually falls asleep waiting.

He never receives an answer and that, he thinks, is answer enough.

 


	12. Chapter 12

College student fancy ends up being Olive Garden, Elliott in a maroon button up shirt and slacks, Blaine in white button up, layered with a vest and a red tie and paired with black skinny jeans and his nicest pair of dress shoes. It feels oddly dressed up for a break up.

Things feel off from the beginning. Elliott keeps glancing at him awkwardly, like he knows something Blaine doesn't. Blaine's heart leaps at the idea that maybe, just maybe, Elliott's going to break up with him first. Maybe he realizes things aren't quite right between them and is planning on relieving Blaine of his duty.

Their waiter brings them their entrees just as Blaine's phone buzzes in his pocket. Elliott instantly stiffens as he watches Blaine pull the phone from his pocket, giving him an apologetic smile.

_ Did Sam hook up with someone last night? - T _

Blaine frowns at the text, wondering why Tina would text him about that.

“ Who's that?” Elliott's voice is calculated, cold. Blaine's frown deepens when he looks up.

“ What?”

“ The text. Is it from Kurt?” he practically spits out his roommate's name. Blaine narrows his eyes.

“ No... it's from Tina,” he cocks his head, “Would it be a problem if it were from Kurt?”

Elliott scowls, “No,” he says, though everything about him screams differently. Blaine puts his phone on the table and crosses his arms over his chest.

“ Okay, what's going on?”

Elliott glares at him without speaking, mouth pressed into a thin line. He looks... beyond angry. Far angrier than Blaine has ever seen him.

“ Nothing,” he says, looking away from Blaine.

“ Don't,” Blaine pleads, “Please, I came here tonight to talk, so let's-”

“ Oh my god,” Elliott's defensive stance dropped and he stared at Blaine, “To  _ talk _ . You came here to  _ talk _ .”

“ Um.” Blaine clears his throat, “Yeah. I came here to talk.”

Elliott stares at him, then says, “You mean break up.”

“ Elliott-”

“ I knew it,” he shakes his head, “I knew this was going to happen, this  _ always _ happens.”

“ What always happens?” Blaine asks, “I don't understand what's going on.”

“ Why do you want to break up?”

Blaine runs a hand over his face, “I never said I wanted to break up.”

“ But you do, don't you? I know you do. I can see it on your face. Just tell me why.”

Blaine sighs, thinks of the best way to say this without sounding like a complete dick, “I don't know what to say,” he finally admits, “I've never done this before.”

“ Broken up with someone?”

“ Yes,” Blaine groans, “I'm sorry, I'm doing this all wrong, and I'm sorry that you're angry, I'm just trying to understand if I did something that set you off.”

Elliott's hands go to his hair and he exhales deeply. “Please just tell me why you want to break up.”

Blaine looks down at his lap, “I don't love you,” he whispers.

He can feel Elliott staring at him, “You don't- Of course you don't love me, we've been dating for a  _ month _ . I don't love you yet either, but-”

“ Yet, see,” Blaine says, “That's the difference. You don't love me  _ yet _ . I don't think I'm ever going to love you. I can't... I can't keep dating you in good conscious knowing I won't ever love you.”

“ Blaine-”

“ No, listen. My ex broke up with me after two years by basically telling me he never loved me. I can't do that to you. I won't make you hurt like that.”

His confession is met with silence. He glances up to see Elliott staring away from him, jaw clenched, hands formed in fists on the table. “Is it because of Kurt?” he asks quietly.

“ Wh- What?”

“ I know you like him,” Elliott says, “I've always known. I just thought you'd get over it, you know? Fall for me instead.”

Blaine purses his lips together, “I did too,” he admits, voice soft. “I'm so sorry.” Elliott scoffs, “I  _ am _ . And I'm sorry for whatever I did before that made you so angry at me tonight. I'm sorry it all happened this way.”  _ I'm sorry it happened at all _ .

Elliott doesn't answer for a long time, just stares into the distance, thinking. Blaine watches him carefully, tries to read his mood, what might happen next.

“ You didn't do anything,” he finally admits, heaving a deep sigh and slumping his shoulders, “I just- Kurt told me something earlier that kind of pissed me off and it’s had me on edge.”

“ Do you... want to talk about it?” Blaine asks hesitantly, wincing as soon as he does. Elliott laughs, but he doesn't sound amused.

“ No offense, but not with you.”

Blaine nods, “I understand,” he whispers, “And... I know I'm not really in a position to ask this, but. Please don't tell Kurt? I don't want him acting weird around me. I value his friendship a lot.” He pauses and makes sure Elliott is looking him in the eye when he says, “Just like I value yours.”

Elliott rolls his eyes, “Blaine, you don't have to-”

“ It's the truth,” he says, shrugging, “You, Kurt, and Tina are really the best friends I've made since I came here. Tina's already gone. I don't want to lose you too.”

Elliott gives him a neutral stare, one that Blaine can't decipher. “You're a good friend too, Blaine,” he admits after a few minutes, “I hope you don't mind me taking some time off from our friendship though. I'm not like Kurt that way. I can't just break up with someone and then keep seeing them every day right after.”

“ I understand,” Blaine nods, “I think I need some time apart as well. Not just from you, but from Kurt as well.”

“ Yeah,” Elliott sighs. “So... I guess that's it. For us.”

“ As a couple, yes.” Blaine smiles hopefully, “But not as friends. Not forever, at least.”

“ Not forever,” Elliott says, and it sounds like a promise. “I think I'm going to... leave. I'll pay for our meals, don't worry.”

“ No, I'll pay,” Blaine says, pulling out his wallet, “I broke up with you, I should-”

“ I insist.”

Blaine smiles at his lap, “I didn't deserve you,” he whispers. “I never did. You always said you didn't deserve me, but that's not true. I've never deserved you.”

“ Oh, Blaine.”

“ No, Elliott, I'm a terrible person. I led you on instead of rejecting you outright, I strung you along for  _ months _ , stopped you from dating someone who could love you back. I'm so sorry I did that to you.”

Elliott doesn't answer immediately, instead looks down at his lap. He sighs, and says, “I don't know what to tell you, Blaine. We just broke up. Part of me wants to assure you that you're one of the best people I know, but another part of me wants to agree with you.”

Blaine laughs, feeling tears prick at his eyes. “I really am sorry.”

“ It's okay. Just give me time,” he catches Blaine's eye, “I think we can be friends again in time, Blaine. I promise.”

Blaine allows himself to smile, “Okay. If we can't-”

“ We don't need to talk about that now,” Elliott stands up, “Just give me some time. We'll talk eventually.”

“ Okay,” Blaine nods, looking down at his plate, “Please let me pay the bill though?”

Elliott laughs and nods, “Fine. Thanks.”

“ Don't thank me for paying for a meal after breaking up with you.”

“ Right.” Elliott sighs, hands going to his pockets, “How will you get home?”

“ Please stop treating me so nice,” Blaine says, “I'll catch the bus. Don't worry. Go home. Vent to Kurt about how horrible I am.”

“ Got it,” Elliott chuckles, “Sorry. I guess I'm not that good at breaking up.”

“ Me neither.” They share a bittersweet smile and then Elliott's gone, leaving Blaine to stare after him, a sense of relief he never imagined he'd feel after a breakup flooding through him.

He stays and eats his plate of pasta, then eats Elliott's too. He gets a couple of looks from other patrons, but he doesn't care much. He's paying for both these dinner's, and he just broke up with his boyfriend. He's allowed to gorge a little.

**

_ Sorry I didn't text you back earlier _ ,  _ was busy breaking up with Elliott. Don't know if Sam hooked up this weekend. Haven't seen him in a bit. - B _

Blaine holds his phone loosely in his hand as he rides the bus back to his house, wondering if he should text Kurt. He knows Elliott will have got home at this point, so Kurt must already know about the break up. He wants to text him, tell him himself, but it seems useless. Kurt's only been Blaine's close friend for about a month. Elliott and Kurt have been best friends for years.

_ Oh my god, are you okay?!?! What happened?!?! - T _

_ I'm okay. Just wasn't working. I promise we'll try and make things not awkward for when you get back though – B _

He should text Kurt anyway. Let him know he still wants to be his friend. Maybe tell him about the couple of weeks he wants to take to himself to think. Come to terms with the inevitable situation of being in love with his straight friend for the significant future.

_ omg don't worry about me lol worry about you!!!! I can't believe this!!!! I've been rooting for you guys all this time – T. _

Blaine sighs as he texts back a simple  _ Sorry _ .

He exits out of his conversation with Tina and glances at the conversation underneath it, with Kurt. He opens it to see the last text Kurt sent him –  _ Don't have too much fun tonight! _

Before he can talk himself out of it he starts to type a new message.  _ Elliott and I broke up. I'm sure you already know, but wanted to tell you myself – B _ .

He stares at it, wondering if there's any other, possibly less awkward way, to say it. He can't think of one, so he presses send and watches as the little text box turns blue. He then exits back to Tina's conversation, which has a new message in it.

_ Why are you sorry?!?! Are you sad?!?! Do you need to skype?!?! - T _

He smiles, and texts back  _ Good for now. Maybe tomorrow? Or, later today for you – B. _

It isn't until he's getting off at his stop, thanking the bus driver on his way out, that his phone buzzes again. Instead of a reply from Tina, which is what he's expecting, he sees Kurt's name on his screen.

_ Elliott told me. You okay? Need to meet up and talk? - K _

Blaine stares down at his phone screen in confusion. Shouldn't Kurt be saying he never wants to speak to him again for hurting his friend? He shakes his head. It doesn't matter anyway. He's already made his decision.

_ Maybe in a couple of weeks? I think I need some time to myself to figure things out. Sorry – B. _

His house is warmer than the night outside, and Cooper's waiting for him in the kitchen with a plate of cookies and a, “Did you do it?”

Blaine nods. “Yeah. He was... actually really great about it. He's such a good guy,” Blaine fell into a chair and buried his face in his hands, “Did I just make a horrible mistake by breaking up with him?”

“ Absolutely not,” Cooper assures, sitting down in the chair next to Blaine's and placing the cookies in front of him. “You did the right thing. Breaking up with someone is always rough, but trust me, you'll both be happier for it in the long run.”

Blaine sighs and takes a bite out of a cookie. He frowns, “Did you make this?”

“ Absolutely.”

He hums, “It's really good, Coop.”

“ Thanks! I've been getting ready for this audition for a role as a baker. Think I'll get the part?”

Blaine laughs and leans his head on his brother's shoulder, “If you bring a batch of these in with you? Most definitely.”

**

Right before he goes to bed, he receives a text from Kurt that makes his heart soar.

_ I understand. Just don't forget, you owe me a sushi date! - K. _

 


	13. Chapter 13

Despite his request for time, Kurt still texts him. A lot.

Every text starts the same :  _ So, I know you said you needed time, but _ .

But.

But he just saw a dog with big hazel eyes and it reminded him of Blaine.

But he passed by the sushi place and remembered he and Blaine are supposed to go there soon.

But Tina's been pestering him because Blaine isn't answering her texts.

But Sam's been over a lot and asking Kurt strange questions about the 'bro code'.

But Elliott went out the other night and didn't come home until the morning and Kurt is upset Blaine couldn't come over to keep him company.

But he saw him on campus and wanted to say hi, but he also wanted to respect his desire to take time to himself.

But even though they haven't been close for long, he really misses him.

Blaine doesn't answer any of them. Partially because he misses Kurt too, and he likes the reminder that Kurt can't seem to stop. Partially because he's worried that if he texts back,  _ he _ won't be able to stop.

Whenever he feels the urge to text back, he shoves his phone under his giant pile of textbooks and goes back to doing work. Not spending time with his friends has given him quite a bit of time to not only catch up on his studies, but to work ahead. The only times he gets distracted are when Kurt or Tina text him, Tina concerned, Kurt just cause.

He texts Tina back after about a week and a half, just to assure her that he's okay. Afterward, he turns off his phone so he can firmly concentrate on finishing up his essay for Modern Theater.

When he turns his phone on later at night, it's to find four texts from Tina and one from Kurt.

_ I know you said you need time, but I've been craving sushi and it made me think of you. Sorry to keep bothering you like this. I miss you – K. _

Blaine smiles to himself, plugs his phone into the charger, and goes to sleep.

**

He goes to the beach two weeks after his and Elliott's break up. It's chilly, which is to be expected given it's February, but there are still surfers in the water. Blaine sits down on a pier and watches them. This summer, he thinks, he might try it out. Maybe he'll ask Kurt and Elliott to teach him.

If Elliott is done hating him by then of course.

“ I'm sorry,” a voice says behind him and he turns around to see Kurt standing on the pier, hair wet, wet suit clinging to his body, “I know you said you needed time, but I saw you watching, and I just-” He shakes his head and a water droplet lands on Blaine's forehead. “Sorry. I'll leave. I'm sorry I've been texting you so much. And for apologizing so much. Sorry.”

Blaine stands up to stop him, even though Kurt has made no move to leave, “It's okay,” he says, smiling ruefully, “It's been two weeks. I think I've taken enough time.”

Kurt blows out a breath, “Thank god. I've been missing you like crazy.”

“I hadn't noticed,” Blaine can't help but tease, “You know, from all the texts you've sent me.”

Kurt rolls his eyes, then comes forward to hug him tight. He's cold and wet, but still so solid against Blaine. He makes him feel complete.

“I missed you too, by the way,” Blaine tells him quietly. Kurt squeezes him tighter.

**

It's another two weeks before he sees Elliott again. He's standing in front of Kurt and Elliott's apartment, hoping and praying that Elliott has already left for his... whatever he's doing tonight. He's not sure he wants the first time he sees Elliott since they broke up to be before he spends the entire evening with the guy he sort of broke up with Elliott for.

Of course, no such luck. Elliott opens the door after Blaine knocks and stares at him wide eyed for several seconds. Blaine feels frozen where he stands, staring up at his ex-boyfriend, mouth slightly parted.

“Elliott,” he breathes, “Hey.”

“Blaine,” Elliott nods, “I didn't realize you were coming over today.”

Blaine shrugs, “Pizza and a movie.”

“Sounds exciting.”

Blaine nods, “Yeah, I guess.”

Both continue to stare at each other for several moments, the tension palpable.

“Look-”

“Elliott, I'm-”

They both chuckle, and Elliott gestures to Blaine, “You go first.”

“I'm so sorry Elliott,” Blaine says, “For how things turned out. I know I said it a lot when we broke up, but I really am.”

Elliott smiles, “Thanks,” he scratches the back of his neck, “I'm sorry too. For the way I acted that day. It wasn't your fault, and I was just... yeah. I'm sorry.”

Blaine nods. “So. You're going out tonight.”

“Yeah,” Elliott takes a deep breath, “On a date.”

He knows he shouldn't, but Blaine can't stop himself from grinning, “Oh my god, Elliott, that's amazing! What's he like?”

“Whoa,” Elliott holds up his hands, “No boy talk yet. One step at a time.”

Blaine nods bashfully, “Right, sorry. I-”  _ forgot _ . What is wrong with him?

“Maybe... eventually?” Elliott says, “We can get there. Slowly?”

“I'd like that,” Blaine agrees.

“Will you two morons stop standing around and get your asses in here?” Kurt shouts from inside the apartment, “Blaine I hope you don't mind, I ordered you an entire pizza. I was going to do half and half, but I haven't eaten anything today.”

Blaine chuckles and walks into the apartment, smiling hesitantly at Elliott as he passes him by, “That sounds perfect.”

_ Well, maybe not perfect _ he thinks as Elliott smiles back, then makes his way to his room,  _ but it's getting there _ .

 


	14. Chapter 14

_I'm bored. Come entertain me – Kurt._

Blaine stares at the text message, lip worried between his teeth. He glances at his laptop, where his unfinished Stage to Film paper is open. It's not due until next week, but he prefers not to leave papers to the last minute.

 _Sorry. Doing homework – Blaine_.

It only takes a second for Kurt to respond.

 _Boo – Kurt_.

Blaine chuckles, stomach fluttering pleasantly.

 _Bring the homework with you. Please? I'm sosososososo bored – Kurt_.

Blaine sighs, chews on his bottom lip for a moment, then.

_Will Elliott be there? - Blaine._

He manages to write three more sentences of his paper in the time it takes Kurt to reply.

_No. Just you and me. Come over – Kurt._

How is he supposed to refuse?

**

“Oh my _god_ ,” Kurt practically throws the door to his apartment open, “Why do you live so far away?”

“Because Coop lets me stay with him rent free?”

Kurt barks out a laugh, “Yeah, touche. And, wow, you actually brought your homework with you.”

Blaine shrugs, placing his messenger bag on the dining room table, “You said I could.”

“Didn't think you actually would,” Kurt pouts. “Okay, well, if you're going to be studying I might as well get some work done too.”

Blaine narrows his eyes, “You invited me over even though you have homework to do?”

“I invited you over so I could avoid the homework I have to do. Obviously.”

Blaine chuckles, settling into the chair at the end of the table and pulling his laptop out of his bag, “Well, enough of that. Go get your stuff, let's get to work.”

“Yes, mother,” Kurt sticks his tongue out but does as he's told. Blaine watches him go, holding his breath to keep the love lorn sigh from escaping his lips.

**

They've been working for a good hour and half when Kurt slams his laptop lid shut and declares, “Okay, I'm done. No more. I'm ordering a pizza and we're going to be lazy for the rest of the night and there's nothing you can do about that.”

It's just as well, Blaine supposes; he's got enough done on his paper to justify a break. “Fine. But I get to pick the movie.”

“Deal,” Kurt grins, the skin around his eyes crinkling at the action, “Hawaiian, right?”

Blaine nods, packing his things away, “You know me so well.”

Kurt shrugs, looking far too pleased, “I try.”

**

They're halfway through The Avengers (much to Kurt's chagrin) when the pizza arrives. They pause the movie long enough to pay the guy and then settle back in the couch, both already munching on a slice.

They're nearing the end when Kurt shifts closer to Blaine, eyes not leaving the screen. Blaine glances at him, but Kurt doesn't look back, instead once again shifting a little bit closer.

 _He's probably just uncomfortable_ Blaine tells himself, trying to focus on the end of the movie _._ It's difficult though, with Kurt suddenly so close. He can barely concentrate on breathing properly, much less taking in what's happening on the screen in front of him.

“Hey,” Kurt whispers. Blaine turns to look at him, sure that Kurt must be able to hear his heart pounding through his chest, “You okay?”

Blaine nods, not sure he should be trusted with words at the moment. Kurt is so close, his eyes so bright, lips to pink, body so warm. Blaine wants. He wants so badly, and he hates that he can't have. Even with Tina not around he still can't have.

“You sure? You look a little flush,” Kurt puts a hand on his forehead, “You feel warm.”

Blaine shrugs, “I'm fine,” he squeaks out.

“Blaine,” Kurt moves even closer still, moving his body so he's facing Blaine, arm slinging over the back of the couch, “You'd tell me if something was wrong, right?”

“Of course,” Blaine says, breathing becoming labored. Kurt is everywhere, surrounding him, so close, so close, “I'm fine. Really.”

“Okay,” Kurt whispers, fingers teasing at Blaine's shoulder. He stares at Blaine for a few seconds then asks, “Why did you and Elliott break up?”

“Um,” is the only thing Blaine can manage. Kurt's fingers fully drop to Blaine's shoulder, rubbing gently, sending spikes of heat right through him.

“You don't have to tell me,” Kurt says, face moving, if anything, closer, “It just seemed sudden. You guys crushed on each other for months.”

 _Not really_ , “He didn't tell you?”

Kurt shakes his head, “He said it wasn't his place, or something.”

Right. Blaine keeps forgetting how Elliott is the best person on the face of the earth, “Well, um.” He clears his throat, “It just... wasn't working.”

“You and Elliott?”

Blaine shakes his head, “Me,” he says quietly, brain foggy, “I didn't really- I tried. It wasn't working.”

“Why not?” Kurt asks, leaning closer, closer, so close. Blaine holds his breath, “Blaine?”

He doesn't know what to say, what to do. This was never a situation he anticipated, he never thought he'd even be in this situation. “I-” he tries, but falls short. All he can see are Kurt's lips, soft and full, right there, right in front of him, he could just-

It's Kurt who closes the final gap, pressing those perfect lips against Blaine's. Everything inside him melts at the touch and all he can think is that he never wants this to stop, never wants Kurt to stop. He manages to raise a hand to hold the side of Kurt's face, keeping him there. Kurt's lips move softly, testing, sure. Blaine forces himself to respond, wants Kurt to know that he wants this, needs this. He's not sure how he ever lived without it.

“Is this okay?” Kurt whispers, pulling apart. Blaine whines in response and brings him back in, moving his other hand so both hands are framing Kurt's face. Their lips meet for the second time and it's even better than the first. Kurt's hand clutches his shoulder and opens his mouth, inviting Blaine in. He doesn't wait, licking into Kurt's mouth with vigor, tasting what he's wanted to taste for far too long.

Kurt's other hand finds Blaine's side, pulls him forward until Blaine is perched in Kurt's lap, lapping at the insides of Kurt's mouth. Kurt groans under him, holds him close, one hand firmly wrapped around Blaine's waist, the other dropping to his ass and resting there. Blaine pushes his ass into the hold, encouraging more. Kurt takes the hint and squeezes, tight and firm and perfect.

They keep kissing until they can't, separating to catch their breath. Blaine can't open his eyes, doesn't want to, afraid when he does he'll realize the man underneath him isn't Kurt, that the warm breath hitting his lips isn't escaping from Kurt's parted ones, that the hand resting possessively on his ass is someone else's.

“Hey,” Kurt whispers, it is Kurt, it's Kurt, everything is Kurt, Kurt holding him, Kurt touching him, Kurt's lips brushing his as he speaks, “Blaine. You with me?”

“Yeah,” Blaine replies, pushing forward to kiss him again, hands gripping Kurt's shoulders for leverage, licking back in. Kurt moans his appreciation and squeezes Blaine's ass tightly, his other hand falling to Blaine's left cheek and giving it a similar treatment. “”Is this real?” he can't help but ask, voice breathless. Kurt chuckles, pecks him on the lips.

“Of course,” he kisses Blaine again, “Why wouldn't it be?”

Blaine doesn't want to think about that, so he presses in closer and allows Kurt to kiss his worries away.

He's not sure how long they kiss, could be minutes or hours, but eventually Kurt pulls away and whispers, “We should cool down.”

“What?” Blaine shakes his head, nose brushing Kurt's as he does, “No, why would we stop?”

“Because,” Kurt's hips buck up. Blaine whimpers at the feel of Kurt's cock hard against the back of his thigh. He remembers so long ago, Tina talking about Kurt and his cock. How many times has he fantasized about seeing it? Having it for himself? He needs this.

“Please,” Blaine rolls his hips down to meet Kurt's. He's surprised he isn't fully hard yet, but he can feel himself hardening in his jeans when Kurt meets his thrust, their cocks brushing together through their jeans. “Don't stop.”

“Blaine-”

“I want to,” he promises, kissing Kurt as hard as he can, “Don't stop, okay?”

Kurt kisses him back, licks his lips gently, “You're sure?”

He feels all the breath knocked out of his body. Elliott asked him that not three months ago, and all Blaine could think was that he was sure he needed it to get over Kurt. Now here he was, in a similar position, but with Kurt beneath him instead. Kurt, who he'd spent as much time trying to get over as he had crushing on him. Kurt, who he's pretty sure is the love of his life.

“I've never been more sure of anything in my life.”

Kurt pulls him close, their cocks rubbing together through their jeans and sucks Blaine's bottom lip into his mouth, “We should move this to the bedroom.”

Blaine scrambles off his lap, grabs his hand and drags him down the hall. Kurt chuckles, speeding up and wrapping his arms around Blaine from behind. “There's no rush,” he promises, squeezing Blaine close to him and kissing him right behind the ear. Blaine shudders in his arms.

“I just really want you,” he whispers in reply, exposing his throat for Kurt to kiss down. He does, lips trailing down Blaine's throat sinfully, soft and wet and hot and everything Blaine has ever wanted.

“You have me,” Kurt brushes against his skin. Blaine whimpers again, something hot stinging at the back of his eyelids. He's not sure he'll ever get those words out of his head.

 _You don't have him_ he tries to tell himself as Kurt continues to kiss up and down his neck, _not forever. Just for tonight_.

Kurt's hand runs down his stomach until it reaches Blaine's cock, palming him softly. Blaine's hips buck forward at the touch. Tonight might be enough.

“Please,” he whines, Kurt's hand rubbing up and down his clothed erection. “Kurt, please.”

“Bedroom,” is all Kurt whispers, and Blaine wants to scream. He takes Kurt's hand and finally manages to drag him into Kurt's room.

They stare at each other after Kurt kicks the door shut, both breathing heavily. Kurt looks so beautiful like this, cheeks flushed, pupils blown, cock hard in his pants. Blaine rushes at him, pressing a hot kiss to his mouth as his hands immediately drop to Kurt's jeans. He can feel his own cock throbbing in his pants and promises himself that freeing his own erection will be his next move. For now, he works as hard as he can at popping the button on Kurt's jeans and lowering the zip. He needs to see Kurt's cock, needs to feel it in his hands.

“Slow down,” Kurt says, chuckling at Blaine's desperation, “I meant it when I said there was no rush.”

“I just really need you, okay?” Blaine tries to explain, pushing Kurt's jeans down and off his hips. Kurt wriggles out of them, leaving him standing in only his underwear, navy blue with a dark spot where the head of his cock rests. Blaine whines and lowers himself to his knees before he can stop himself, and rubs his face over Kurt.

“Shit,” Kurt groans, a hand coming down and cupping the back of Blaine's neck. Blaine can't take it any longer and pulls Kurt's underwear down, mouth watering when Kurt's cock is finally revealed.

Tina's right. He's big. Bigger than Elliott and definitely bigger than Sebastian. Thick and red, bobbing against his stomach, pre-come leaking from the slit of his head. Blaine places his hands on Kurt's hips, leans forward and laps at the head.

“Fuck, shit, Blaine,” Kurt whines, trying to thrust forward. Blaine smirks up at him and holds his hips tight. He presses a hot kiss to the head of Kurt's cock, drags his lips along the ridge, down the length. He's smooth as silk beneath him and hot, so hot. Blaine kisses his way back up, wanting to kiss everywhere on this marvelous cock, the cock he's dreamed of so often. How many times has he gotten off to the thought of this cock in his mouth, in his ass?

Unable to wait any longer he sucks the tip of Kurt's cock in his mouth, marveling at how thick it sits against his tongue. He takes him in a little deeper, clutching Kurt's hips tightly with one hand while the other dips down to his own pants. He unzips his jeans and pops the button, fishing his cock out of his pants and giving it a firm stroke. Kurt's cock throbs in his mouth. He licks around the ridge of the head, breathing heavily through his nose.

“Blaine,” Kurt hisses, hand clenching and unclenching at the nape of Blaine's neck, “Shit, Blaine.”

He bobs his head up and down, tongue flicking Kurt's slit as he does, squeezing his own cock tight in an effort not to come too soon. He takes Kurt deeper with every bob of his head, pleasure filling him as Kurt's hand tightens around his neck, pushing him further down. He can feel Kurt throbbing in his mouth and it's absolutely glorious.

“Blaine,” Kurt shouts, “Blaine, stop, gonna-” despite his words his hand keeps Blaine in place, “I'm gonna come.”

Blaine looks up at him from beneath his lashes and releases his cock with a wet _pop_. “Isn't that the point?” he asks, leaning forward to lick at the pre-come leaking from Kurt's cock.

“Shit,” Kurt's knees tremble, “I don't- not from this. Wanna fuck you.”

Blaine pulls his head back instantly, eyes wide and excited, “Fuck, yes,” he stands up, pushing his pants and underwear down as soon as he can, “Yes, fuck me, yes, please.”

Kurt laughs and pulls him in for a kiss, the motion bringing their cocks together. Kurt's is still wet with Blaine's spit and Blaine can feel it against his own, wants to rut against him until he comes but no, no, Kurt wants to fuck him, he needs Kurt to fuck him.

“Bed?” Kurt asks, nipping at Blaine's bottom lip. Blaine wonders if Kurt can taste himself on Blaine's tongue. He nods and lets Kurt back him onto the mattress, lets Kurt peel his shirt off, watches as Kurt pulls his own off just as quickly and then they're naked, kissing and it's so much but not enough, never enough.

They kiss and kiss and rock together forever and it feels so, so wonderful, but Blaine needs more. He's had a taste, after all this time, finally had a taste, and he needs more.

“Lube?” he asks, holding Kurt's face in his hands to make sure Kurt doesn't distract him with his beautiful kisses. Kurt nods and, unfortunately, gets off him in order to get the lube and a condom out of his night stand.

“Top or bottom?” Kurt asks, and Blaine stares for a few moments. He didn't realize topping was even an option, but applauds Kurt for his open mindedness. He doesn't know many (or, any, really) straight guy who would let a gay guy fuck him in the ass.

Still, he _has_ been dreaming of this moment forever, so despite the opportunity, “Bottom,” he says, flipping onto his stomach and pushing his ass up, “Fuck me, please.”

“Shit,” Kurt runs his hands over Blaine's ass cheeks, then leans down and bites the left one, “Has anyone ever told you that your ass is perfect?”

Blaine laughs, “Actually, yes,” he teases, then wiggles his butt in Kurt's face, “Please finger me now?”

“Yeah, shit. Yeah.” There's a click, a squelch, and then Kurt's cold finger is rubbing over his hole. Blaine hisses at the temperature. “Sorry,” Kurt whispers, leaning forward to press a kiss to Blaine's left ass cheek. Blaine shakes his head, it doesn't matter, all that matters is that Kurt stop rubbing at his rim like that and just stick his finger up his ass already.

He does, finally, and it's so wonderful. Blaine reaches down to palm his cock as Kurt's finger slides in and out, crooking ever so slightly so the pad of his finger drags along Blaine's inner walls. “Don't,” Kurt whispers against his ass, “Don't touch yourself. Want you to come with me in you.”

Blaine doesn't respond, only keens when Kurt's finger disappears and reappears moments later with another finger. “Fuck,” he groans, biting the blanket in front of him and arching his back so his ass sticks out further. Kurt's fingers are long and slim and it doesn't take long for them to find his prostate, stroking it softly several times before retreating. Blaine grabs the blanket in tight fists in order to stop himself from reaching down and stroking himself to completion. He wants to wait until Kurt is inside him, but shit is it getting hard.

“I can take three, three please,” he says, or at least he thinks he says. Kurt obliges and soon Blaine has three fingers pumping in and out of him quickly, fingertips brushing teasingly against his prostate on every thrust.

“Okay,” he says, reaching a hand back and taking Kurt's wrist in hand, extracting his fingers from Blaine's ass. He rolls over when they're gone and stares into Kurt's eyes, memorizes the desire written over his face, all of it for Blaine. He's waited so long for Kurt to look at him that way he barely knows what to do now that he is. “Fuck me, please,” is all he manages to say.

Kurt nods, enthusiastic as ever, rolls the condom on and slathers his cock with lube. Blaine tries not to notice how he doesn't use too much, nor does he use too little, both possibility's given Kurt's sexuality, but he doesn't dwell on it. It's hard to dwell on anything with Kurt's cock positioned at his hole, the head already pressing in.

“Tell me if I go too fast,” Kurt says, then leans forward to kiss Blaine far softer than Blaine thought he would at the same time that he presses in.

He'd known Kurt was big far before actually seeing his cock, but knowing it and seeing it are completely different from feeling it. There's a brief moment of _too much_ as Kurt presses in, but it passes as soon as Kurt bottoms out. Blaine can feel him throbbing inside of him and he wants him to move so bad but he doesn't, he just sits there.

Blaine takes matters into his own hands, shifting his hips off of Kurt's cock and then thrusting back in. Kurt holds himself up on top of Blaine and stares into his eyes, lips beestung, the blue of his eyes almost eliminated by the black of his pupils. Blaine raises an eyebrow in return and rolls his hips again. Kurt's entire face falls, his jaw drops and Blaine wants nothing more than to flip them over and ride Kurt into the mattress. He doesn't though, gives Kurt a chance to take control.

Take control he does. Kurt leans down and kisses Blaine for all he's worth while finally beginning to snap his hips back and forth, fucking Blaine hard and deep with every thrust. Blaine moans into Kurt's mouth, lifts his legs and wraps them around Kurt's waist to hold him closer. He wants to pull Kurt down, to cover himself with him. He wants to get lost in this moment, in this boy who he's loved for so long. He doesn't want this to ever end.

Kurt bites down on his bottom lip at the same time that his cock hits Blaine's prostate and Blaine has to hold back a scream. He pulls Kurt even closer, clutching his shoulder with his hands and keeps kissing him, open mouthed and panting. Their closer position causes Blaine's cock to rub against Kurt's stomach and he keens at the sensation, back arching. He can feel himself getting close but he doesn't want this to end. He's not ready for his one night with Kurt to be over, isn't sure he'll ever be ready for it to be over.

“Could he fuck you like this?” Kurt asks, voice low and rough, breath staccato.

Blaine doesn't have the muscle power to frown in confusion so instead he simply asks, “Who?”

“Elliott,” Kurt practically spits out the name, rubbing his cock against Blaine's prostate in the most delicious way, “Could he fuck you this deep? Was his cock even big enough to-” he wiggles his hips, barely a movement but enough for the head of his cock to press against Blaine's prostate absolutely perfectly. This time, he can't hold back the scream.

“Kurt,” Blaine shouts, fingernails digging into Kurt's back, “Please, fuck me, please.”

“Did he make you scream, Blaine?” Kurt asks, nipping at Blaine's lips. Blaine doesn't respond, too busy losing himself to the feeling of Kurt fucking in and out roughly, cock brushing his prostate with every thrust, “Tell me.”

“Kurt, fuck-”

“Tell me, Blaine. Did he make you beg? Beg to be fucked harder? Make you lose control, make you run your fingernails down his back in pleasure?”

Blaine gasps as Kurt's hand wraps around his cock.

“Come on, Blaine. Tell me. Did he make you feel like this? Make you feel this good?”

“No!” Blaine screams, “No, fuck, he didn't, shit Kurt, please. Let me come, I need to come, I'm so close.”

Kurt smirks down at him, rolls his hips at the perfect angle, makes Blaine throw his head back in pleasure, “Ask me again.”

“Please let me come, Kurt,” Blaine begs, Kurt's hand is torture on his cock, his hole fluttering around Kurt's dick pounding in and out of him without pause.

“Fuck,” Kurt swears, dropping a hard kiss that's more teeth than lip onto Blaine's mouth, “Say my name again, please.”

“ _Kurt_ ,” Blaine moans, eyes closing as pleasure coils in his belly, “Kurt, fuck me, Kurt, oh my god, _Kurt_.”

He comes, spills over Kurt's fist and his own stomach, comes with Kurt's cock buried deep inside him, Kurt's name on his lips like a prayer. He feels Kurt throb inside him and Kurt strokes him through it, eyes wide and focused on Blaine's face. Blaine wants to watch, wants to look at Kurt as he comes, but it becomes too much and his eyes shut of their own accord, letting him ride out the wave of his orgasm in blissful darkness.

As he lowers from his high he notices Kurt still hasn't come, is still shallowly fucking him. Blaine whines, oversensitivity already kicking in, but doesn't ask him to stop. Maybe Kurt will never come, maybe he'll just keep fucking him forever. It's a wonderful thought, albeit an unrealistic one.

It's not a long lived fantasy. Kurt comes several thrusts later, furiously fucking in and out of Blaine as he does, lips falling open and face slackening. Blaine will never forget this moment, right now, watching Kurt Hummel come into his ass. Even if he tried he's not sure he'd be able to.

“Fuck,” Kurt breathes out, collapsing on top of Blaine and knocking the wind out of him. Blaine inhales sharply in shock and Kurt mutters a quiet, “Sorry,” into his ear. Blaine sighs, shifts, tries to adjust to the weight of Kurt on him. “I'll move in a second,” Kurt promises, “Get a cloth to clean us up or something.”

Blaine lets his arms relax around Kurt, lets himself hold him, just this once. After all, he's not sure if he'll get the chance to do it again.

“Okay,” Kurt pushes himself off of Blaine, “I'll be right back, I promise.” He kisses Blaine softly before disappearing into the hallway, leaving Blaine alone. Blaine rolls over on his side, thinks about getting up and getting dressed, but decides to stay put. He doesn't have enough time to leave before Kurt comes back anyway.

He takes a deep breath and steels himself for Kurt's return, knowing what will come along with it. He's known since Kurt kissed him. He'll tell Kurt he's flattered that he chose him to experiment with and... well, that, he supposes, will be that.

“Here,” Kurt says, tossing the cloth at him. He's still naked, much to Blaine's surprise, and crawls right back onto the bed with him, smiling and leaning in close to peck him on the lips as soon as he can. “Do you want me to do it for you or something?” he teases, reaching out to take the cloth from Blaine and wiping his stomach with it, “Brat.”

“I-” Blaine doesn't know what to say, watching with disbelief as Kurt cleans up his mess, smirking to himself as he does. “I don't understand.”

Kurt looks up and frowns, “What?”

“I just – I thought you were going to kick me out.”

Kurt rolls over on to his side so he's no longer leaning over Blaine, “And miss out on all the cuddles?”

Blaine flushes at the mere idea of cuddling with Kurt. His arms, he already knows, fit so perfectly around him. “You want to cuddle with me?”

“Obviously. You're like the perfect cuddle size,” Kurt throws an arm over Blaine's stomach and leans in closer, lips curved downwards, “What's going on? I feel like I'm missing something.”

“I thought – You're – I'm really confused right now.”

“That makes two of us,” Kurt pulls him closer and it feels like heaven, “What's going on?”

“You're straight,” Blaine blurts, unable to take it anymore, “You're straight and this was just an experiment, right? You wanted to know what it'd be like to fuck a guy and fucking Elliott would be weird so you chose- why are you laughing at me?”

“Blaine,” Kurt says between laughs, right hand cupping Blaine's cheek like he's precious, “Until my first year in LA I identified as gay.”

It feels like a slap to the face, “Wait. What? But – Tina? Rachel?”

“Are my exes because when I came here I realized that I'm not as one hundred percent gay as I thought,” he smiles, eyes twinkling, “Haven't you ever heard of the term 'bisexuality'?”

“I don't – you – what? I thought-”

“Blaine,” Kurt pulls him closer, “You're not an experiment. I like guys, okay? A lot. My first time was with a guy.”

“But-”

“But I like girls too,” He shrugs, “And right now I like _you_.”

Blaine stares. He can't stop staring. This has to be a joke, some weird form of revenge plotted by Elliott to get back at him for stringing him along. “Bi?”

“Yes, Blaine. Bi. How the hell did you go this long without realizing? You were with me when I ran into Adam!”

“Adam?”

Kurt rolls his eyes, “You know, British, blond, biphobic as fuck? My ex?”

“He's your _ex_?!”

“Yeah, I dated him between Rachel and Tina. I thought you knew that. You said you knew that.”

Blaine flushes, memories of the day they ran into Adam running through his mind. That entire encounter made so much more sense now, “I'm just-” Blaine shakes his head, “I can't believe this is real,” he says, unthinking, “First you kiss me, then the sex, and now _this;_ I must be dreaming.”

Kurt pinches Blaine's side, giggling when he squeaks in surprise, “You're not,” he assures. “Look, I've been attracted to you for a while, but I felt weird acting on it because you and Tina have become so close.” Blaine's eyes widen at the mention of Tina, oh god, he just had sex with his best friends ex-boyfriend, shit, fuck, “Would you relax? She basically gave us her blessing when we broke up. She'd noticed I'd been watching you.”

“What?” Blaine asks for what must be the millionth time. “Wait, you guys were talking about _me_?”

Kurt frowns, “What do you mean?”

“Oh. Uh...” Blaine clears his throat, “The night Tina told everyone she was leaving I sort of... overheard you guys? You know, talking about someone you liked and how Tina wanted you to go for it.” He blushes, “I thought she meant some other girl.”

Kurt laughs, “No, no other girl. Just you,” he shakes his head, “Tina's been bugging me about going for it since you and Elliott broke up. She thinks we'd be cute together. I kind of agree,” he leans forward, pausing seconds before reaching Blaine's lips, “Do you?”

“Do I what?” Blaine asks, breathless.

“Think we'd be cute together?”

Blaine chuckles, “Kurt, I've sort of been crushing on you since we met.”

Kurt's eyes widen at that and he pulls away from him, “Wait, seriously?”

Blaine flushes, “I thought it was totally obvious,” he mumbles, “You couldn't tell?”

“Not at all,” Kurt grins then, “So if you have a crush on me that means you'll definitely say yes to going out for dinner with me next Friday?”

“On a date?”

Kurt pinches his side again, “No, on a rescue mission. Yes, dummy, on a date.”

Blaine feels as if he could float right out of his body, “I – Yeah. Yes, of course, I-” he pauses, thinks, “What about Elliott?”

Kurt pulls Blaine close once again, “I got his permission too,” he rubs their noses together, “He's known I like you for a while. Actually, I told him I liked you the day you guys broke up. He was so pissed at me.”

“Oh my god,” Blaine stares, “ _That's_ why he was so mad that day. God, why am I so clueless about everything?”

“You're not clueless,” Kurt leans forward to kiss his nose, “You're adorable.”

“Shut up,” Blaine says, still in disbelief this is happening, “So... you think Elliott will be okay with this? With us? It hasn't been that long since he and I-”

“He's been working through it,” Kurt interrupts, “But he gave me his blessing the other day. Said he knows there's something between us and he doesn't want to stand in the way of that anymore.”

Blaine smiles, “He's such a great guy,” he shakes his head. “He didn't tell you I liked you?”

“No,” Kurt smirks, “Just that he knew there was something between us. He knew?”

Blaine flushes, “Um. Yeah? He asked me about it when we broke up and I couldn't lie to him.”

Kurt pulls him closer, “So you guys broke up because of me?” He looks far too pleased with himself.

Blaine's blush darkens, “That was just a part of it.”

“Just a part of it? Well, now I'm just plain hurt. I thought you'd been crushing on me forever.”

“Oh my god,” Blaine pushes him away, “You're insufferable, I can't believe I like you!”

“But you do like me, don't you?” Kurt says, pulling him in.

“Yeah,” Blaine nods, “Yeah, I like you a lot.”

“Well hey, that works out just great because I happen to like you quite a lot too.”

He leans forward and kissing him softly. “I can't believe this is real,” Blaine admits, “Please tell me this is real.”

“Oh, honey,” Kurt squeezes his hips and nips his bottom lip, “It's real.”

 


	15. Epilogue

“ Are you sure it's okay for me to be here?” Blaine asks for the fifth time (not that he's been counting).

Santana rolls her eyes just as she has every other time she's asked, “For the bajillionth time, Anderson,  _ yes _ , it's okay for you to be here. She actually specifically asked that you be invited.”

“ But  _ why _ ?” Blaine throws his hands in the air, “I totally stole her boyfriend.”

“ Hey,” Kurt wraps his arm around his waist and pulls him in close, “I resent that. I came to you willingly.”

“ Plus, Kurt totally stole  _ my _ boyfriend and I see you guys like, every day,” Elliott teases, leaning against a railing with a smirk on his face, “I lived. She'll be fine.”

“ But are you  _ sure-” _

“ Jesus Christ, somebody shut him the hell up before I murder him.”

Rachel loops her arm through Santana and coos at her, “Calm down, babe,” she tries, “He's just trying to be thoughtful.”

“ He's not being thoughtful, he's being obnoxious,” Santana glares at Blaine, “Tina texts you literally every day, why the fuck wouldn't she want to see you first thing?”

Blaine shrugs, “It's different overseas,” he mumbles, “It's kind of hard to shove a relationship in her face when she's not even here.”

“ Excuse me,” Elliott speaks up again, “Where was all this thoughtfulness when I walked in on you going down on Kurt in my living room? I would have appreciated some of that back then.”

Blaine stares down at the floor in embarrassment, “You promised never to mention that again,” he mumbles. Kurt pulls him close and presses a kiss to his temple.

“ You two are sickening,” Santana says, scoffing, “And where the hell is Sam? He promised he'd meet us before her plane landed, which was twenty minutes ago.”

“ Probably got caught up with some girl,” Rachel rolls her eyes and leans against Santana, “You know how he is.”

“ We haven't seen Tina for like, seven months,” Santana replies, “This is sort of more important than him getting his cock sucked.”

“ I don't know about that,” comes Sam's voice, and the five of them turn to see him smiling widely at them, a suitcase rolling behind him and his arm slung over Tina's shoulder.

“ Oh my  _ god _ ,” Rachel rushes forward and throws herself at Tina, pushing Sam out of the way in the process. “You're back, oh my god, I missed you so much!”

“ Stop hogging her,” Santana says, peeling Rachel off of Tina and putting herself in her place, “If you ever repeat this I'll deny it, but I missed you Girl Chang.”

“ Oh, I missed you guys too,” Tina squealed, “It's so good to be back! I have so much to tell you guys,” she pulls away from Santana and her eyes land on Kurt and Blaine, still standing close together, Kurt's arm wrapped around Blaine's side, “And  _ you _ have so much to tell  _ me _ .”

Blaine winces, “Tina, I'm-”

“ So glad to see me?” she interrupts, “Me too. Get over here, give me a hug.”

He laughs and does, wrapping her up in his arms and holding her closed, “Missed you,” he whispers in her ear.

“ Missed you back, weirdo.”

“ Yeah, hi,” Elliott speaks up, “Am I the only one wondering why the hell Sam has a suitcase and airplane hair too?”

Blaine separates from Tina, glancing between her and Sam. He bites on his lower lip to conceal a smile.

“ Well,” Sam says, slinging his arm over Tina's shoulder again, “Since Tina's been gone we've been talking. A lot. And we realized-”

“ Sam and I are engaged!”

Everyone is silent for a moment before Santana bursts out, “ _ Excuse me? _ ”

“ Yeah, it happened last night in Paris. Sam flew out to spend the weekend before I came back with me and he took me to the Eiffel Tower and proposed!”

Elliott runs a hand through his hair, “Jesus Christ, as if this group couldn't get any more incestuous.”

Blaine glances between everyone, a laugh building up in his throat so powerful that he can't stop it from bubbling to the surface. “I'm sorry,” he says when everyone turns to him, “It's just- it's kind of true, oh my god.”

Rachel is the next to laugh, cuddling close to Santana who soon bursts into laughter as well. Within moments they're all doubled over, clutching each other, tears escaping some of their eyes. Blaine isn't quite sure he's ever felt happier.

“ Okay,” Tina wheezes, “Please,  _ please _ get me out of here. I need a shower stat, and then I want to hear about everything that went down while I was gone, okay? Especially when it comes to these two nerds,” she points at Kurt and Blaine, still chuckling as she speaks.

“ Oh, that's simple,” Kurt says, pulling Blaine back to him, “We fell in love.”

Blaine stares up at him, eyes wide and lips parted, heart speeding up in a way it hasn't for a long time. Tina scoffs and waves them away, calls them nerds again, picks up her suitcase and starts to walk towards the exit. Everyone follows them, chattering happily, still chuckling every now and then. All except for Kurt and Blaine who remain staring at each other in the middle of the airport like there's no one else around.

“ Do you mean it?” Blaine asks, unable to look away from Kurt's fond stare. Kurt shrugs.

“ Yeah,” he wraps his other arm around Blaine and brings their bodies together, “I love you. That okay?”

Blaine grins, “So,  _ so _ okay,” he leans up to kiss him, licking at his lips as soon as their lips connect, sighing when Kurt kisses back. “I love you too, by the way,” he whispers when they part, eyes opening to find Kurt's yet again. Kurt pulls him in for another kiss, this one longer than the last.

“ Thank god.”

“ Will you two dorks stop making out and get your asses over here?” Tina yells, “I was serious about that shower.”

Kurt and Blaine giggle, kiss each other one last time, then lace their fingers together and sprint towards the exit. Thank god indeed.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading :) I hope you enjoyed <3


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